For the phrase “not living in the real world” grinds my gears

[MrsMillhouse]

I see it a lot on threads when people are talking about people having different lifestyles to them. No idea why, it just irritates me. We all live in the real world, although our viewpoint is likely to be different, it doesn’t make it any less real.

I've never seen that on here. "Grinds my gears" on the other hand...

@FunTimes2020 I totally knew that was coming. Just surprised it was the first post

@FunTimes2020

I've never seen that on here. "Grinds my gears" on the other hand...

Agreed 👏🏼👏🏼

Sorry OP!

Enough of the bloody pile on for “grind my gears! I’m holding you personally responsible @FunTimes2020

'Grips my shit' is the worst

@Northernsoullover I’ve never heard that. But.... ugh... that’s really gross

What does grinds my gears even mean?

I have honestly never heard it uttered in person by anyone. Never seen it on any social media.

@CrouchEndTiger12 irritates me. In fairness, it’s not a phras I use in real life.

Grinds my gears means it gets on my nerves.

What the hell is "grips my shit" though?? Not heard that before.

Grinds my gears really irritates me as well! Sorry OP...

I agree OP. "Not living in the real world" is quite often used to close down people who are perceived to be "up themselves" because they have more money or have dared to think something in a different way or have done something brave.

If I see that phrase I tend to see is as flag for low intelligence tbh.

My mum says it a lot. She seems to think that her world is the only real one because she worked for the nhs. The rest of us live in cloud cuckoo land apparently, including me a social worker and my police officer sister.

It's a weird one. Along with real woman / normal women.

Sweaty betty has stepped away from their usual rail thin model quite some time ago. They now feature women of all shapes and sizes. Their clothes go up to an 18-20 now.

In a recent advert on Instagram depicting women of all shapes and sizes, many commented great to see normal ladies and real women.

What bloody women aren't real and normal?!

It's so weird. Unless you're in the matrix you're in the real world

Quite a lot of people don't live in the real world though. They have no idea about how bad poverty is in this country, you can tell by the 'suggestions' they make when burnout parents working ridiculous hours for financial reasons get told to just be a SAHP or 'take on ironing'.

@SmashingBlouson

Quite a lot of people don't live in the real world though. They have no idea about how bad poverty is in this country, you can tell by the 'suggestions' they make when burnout parents working ridiculous hours for financial reasons get told to just be a SAHP or 'take on ironing'.

I agree with this. It's when people who don't know what it's like to have very little money say things like 'book yourself into a hotel for the night'. That's just not an option for most people. Same as when I moved house & could only afford a man with a van for 2hrs. A friend said 'I don't understand why you're so stressed, just get the movers in and pay for them to do the packing! It's what everyone does!'

I'm not saying that they're not living in the real world, but their world is entirely different to mine, and they don't seem aware that my reality is MY real world.

I'll add in to that as well that people who think you get a council house just by saying you want one are also not living in the real world. So it is something at both ends of the scale...

Well if you want to be a literal pedant OP, then fine.

Just like “grind my gears”, it’s a turn of phrase. As I’m sure you really know.

But, an example, someone who’s has everything handed to them on a plate since birth is unlikely to know how most people live.

Although, most of us have common experiences and we are all human. Which many people forget - and see “other” people as somehow sub-human (Priti Patel and treatment of refugees for example).

I just find the phrase really irritating: as though someone who doesn’t think the same as you or have the same life experience is living in “lala land”. I should point out that I’m not wealthy: I’m not living in poverty either. But I can understand that people on both ends of the scale have equally valid lives that are both in “the real world”

@thepeopleversuswork. Yes exactly.

@thepeopleversuswork I think one of the reasons it annoys me is that I have a relative who says this type of thing: and makes out that I don’t know anything about “the real world” or “normal things” because I may mention things that they don’t understand (we are talking about things that might be common knowledge to many other people on here, such as who is the president of France, or the difference between furlough and WFH)

@SmashingBlouson

Quite a lot of people don't live in the real world though. They have no idea about how bad poverty is in this country, you can tell by the 'suggestions' they make when burnout parents working ridiculous hours for financial reasons get told to just be a SAHP or 'take on ironing'.

This x 100

@SmashingBlouson

Quite a lot of people don't live in the real world though. They have no idea about how bad poverty is in this country, you can tell by the 'suggestions' they make when burnout parents working ridiculous hours for financial reasons get told to just be a SAHP or 'take on ironing'.

But everyone lives in the "real world". Their "real world" just happens to be different from another's real world.

It's a fair point that a lot of people have no grasp of the extent of poverty in this country etc. You do see a lot of comments on here which are probably a bit tiresome to someone living on a very tight budget.

But you can be comfortably off and still have problems: having plenty of money doesn't insulate people from difficulties, pain, sickness or heartbreak. People with money or privilege are just as entitled to have ideas or make suggestions or seek advice as people who don't.

I just think sometimes people use this phrase as a kind of ultimate trump card because they want their misery to take precedence over others and the "not living in the real world" suggestion sort of implies people who don't have financial problems don't have a right to have a seat at the table. It's kind of lazy and a bit insulting.

[quote MrsMillhouse]@thepeopleversuswork I think one of the reasons it annoys me is that I have a relative who says this type of thing: and makes out that I don’t know anything about “the real world” or “normal things” because I may mention things that they don’t understand (we are talking about things that might be common knowledge to many other people on here, such as who is the president of France, or the difference between furlough and WFH)[/quote]
Yes I particularly hate it when its applied to people who have bothered to educate themselves or read up on things by people who haven't. As if only people with vast amounts of privilege have the time to find out who the President of France is. That's just stupidity.