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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Out of control dog disturbing baby in garden - help?!

602 replies

soirritating · 18/07/2021 14:37

I'll keep it as brief as possible. Basically I have a 3 month old baby and we are often out in the garden in the pram in the nice weather. Sometimes she falls asleep whilst out there (obviously I put her in the shade and stay with her just rocking her etc).

My issue is that next door have a small noisy dog which seems to have some sort of motion sensor on it. Literally every time there's any sort of movement, like me standing to rock her from sitting, the dog runs to the fence (I can see through the small slats) and starts yapping very loudly. And it's constant, continual yapping, until the neighbour eventually comes and retrieves it and what I would describe as half heartedly tells it off, eg. "stop it, come inside". Dog ignores her and continues. By this time my baby is wide awake and crying. This is every single time we are in the garden and make any sort of movement. Her "tellings off" are also few and far between - sometimes she just leaves the dog to yap at us through the fence.

As well as waking her sometimes when she's asleep it has also given her a shock and made her cry her on one occasion when we were out in the garden on her playmat - the best shaded area is right by my garden fence so that's where I was sitting with her lying on her mat. Next thing the dogs comes bounding over and is yapping inches from where we are. She startled and cried instantly. I was so upset on this occasion I just went back inside.

I know dogs bark. I get that. But i have owned a dog previously and if it was barking through the fence every single time a neighbour and her small baby were out there I'd be taking it inside. She doesn't seem to do that. So often we just end up back inside so baby isn't upset and can sleep, which I don't think is fair.

I don't expect silence in my garden by any means. But a dog constantly up at the fence, inches from where you know there's a small baby?? I just wouldn't let this continue. I'm starting to feel like I can't use my garden.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Original poster
soirritating · 18/07/2021 21:20

Would it be worth sticking your head over the fence and saying hello to the dog?

Honestly, I love dogs. I say hello to them all the time when out and about, ask owner's permission to stroke them etc. But when a dog is coming at you with persistent barking... it's hard to engage with it in a positive way. Also ... The fence is taller than I am 😬😂

OP posts:
Original poster
soirritating · 18/07/2021 21:25

My terriers bark. They stop once corrected but they still can’t resist it.

I think that might be the difference- you correct them and they respond to you. That's a well trained dog. The neighbour makes few attempts to correct her dog, when she does it's quite half hearted then she walks off, and the dog doesn't listen to her at all. So quite different ...

OP posts:
Drivingmeupthewall · 18/07/2021 21:28

@soirritating

My terriers bark. They stop once corrected but they still can’t resist it.

I think that might be the difference- you correct them and they respond to you. That's a well trained dog. The neighbour makes few attempts to correct her dog, when she does it's quite half hearted then she walks off, and the dog doesn't listen to her at all. So quite different ...

Yes it sounds like they could do more. I’m probably not a typical owner though. We compete so I work with my dogs a lot.

Anyway, even if they do train them to stop barking and respond to a command to correct the bark, if they’ve already let out an excited bark, the baby will have presumably already been disturbed.

I may have missed this in the thread, what breed is it?

DoubleTweenQueen · 18/07/2021 21:29

Dog owner can't be arsed to train their animal away from it's highly antisocial behaviour, but it's the OPs and her baby's fault for being too sensitive/intolerant?
Peak bs.

My dog has been desensitised to movement and noise from neighbours and their dogs, and no longer barks at all, but it takes the owner to be engaged and attentive to fix the problem - and it is a problem.
Stunned by the yappy mutt apologists here.

Original poster
soirritating · 18/07/2021 21:30

@Drivingmeupthewall

Some sort of terrier I think.

OP posts:
2bazookas · 18/07/2021 21:34

Screen your side of the fence so DD doesn't see the dog; and get one of those big waterpistols.

Wallpapering · 18/07/2021 21:34

Yes the shower curtains in the garden are a thing if u look at that group some have made some really fantastic scenery. Not something I’d want for my garden though.

Babies cry for a reason, a yappy dog like op neighbour is down to lazy arse neighbour.

Having constant yapping dogs done me that spent every opportunity staying at parents for 4yrs as it’s was relentless no escape as could hear them in every room of house and lazy bastards neighbours were in all day & night with 4barking dogs, they eventually got taken to court by environmental health it the owners who allowed anti social behaviour

Original poster
soirritating · 18/07/2021 21:34

@DoubleTweenQueen

Dog owner can't be arsed to train their animal away from it's highly antisocial behaviour, but it's the OPs and her baby's fault for being too sensitive/intolerant? Peak bs.

My dog has been desensitised to movement and noise from neighbours and their dogs, and no longer barks at all, but it takes the owner to be engaged and attentive to fix the problem - and it is a problem.
Stunned by the yappy mutt apologists here.

I think this is definitely what's missing - she's not attentive at all to what the dog is doing. It's often down at the fence end of the garden for a while yapping before she comes and addresses it. I can often see and hear her sat having a conversation at the table further up the garden just ignoring the dog's behaviour Confused

OP posts:
Original poster
soirritating · 18/07/2021 21:39

I did also mention with my diagram that it happens on the other fence too - the boundary with the street. Anyone walking past there gets ran at and yapped at. Like I said a few days ago a child walking past with parents started crying and ran, resulting in them falling over on the pavement. Neighbour nowhere to be seen. 🤷‍♀️

OP posts:
badacorn · 18/07/2021 21:44

You shouldn’t have mentioned the baby op. You should have just said my lazy neighbour is letting her bored dog relentlessly yap at me through the fence. The baby is a red herring here but people are jumping on it.

Original poster
soirritating · 18/07/2021 21:53

@badacorn

You shouldn’t have mentioned the baby op. You should have just said my lazy neighbour is letting her bored dog relentlessly yap at me through the fence. The baby is a red herring here but people are jumping on it.

I guess I mentioned the baby because it's the only reason I've become so bothered by the dog. Like I say, pre baby I'd just stick my headphones in and get on with sunbathing and ignore. I thought that might make me less unreasonable, in a way, since I'm not just complaining for the sake of complaining, or because I'm annoyed by the noise. I'm complaining because it disturbs my baby and I find that upsetting.

OP posts:
Original poster
soirritating · 18/07/2021 21:55

Anyway this has discussion has been going on for 8 hours now 😬 so I'm off to get some sleep before baby wakes again.

Thanks everyone for engaging and for the helpful suggestions. Smile

OP posts:
badacorn · 18/07/2021 22:04

Yes it would upset me too (I also have a 3 month old so I know exactly what you are saying). I hope that family take the dog for a walk instead of letting it bark at people Angry

Uramaki · 18/07/2021 22:15

I'm pleased you can see from my (pretty rubbish) diagram that there's only really so far from the fence I can get before I'm back inside my house yes, it's a good diagram!

Jenasaurus · 19/07/2021 01:01

[quote Blue4YOU]@Jenasaurus - little things like robotic hoovers…[/quote]
Wow, I had no idea, is it self regulating or has the odd toe been lost I wonder?

Dogvmarmot · 19/07/2021 01:20

@soirritating

I feel sorry for you neighbour I really do.

Eh?!

I know this place can be brutal but..... eh?!

I've literally never once interacted with the woman. Why do you feel sorry for her exactly?

as many posters have said everyone can do what they like in their garden and it would be unreasonable to ask them to modify their behaviour to create a pleasant garden environment for others. Is the dog smallish? I would keep your baby indoors for the next while but get a pet coyote and let it run free in the garden especially at night. When the dog missing posters go up, maybe get rid of the coyote.
Ratalie · 19/07/2021 02:28

@Dogvmarmot

No, people cannot do whatever they like on their own garden. Excessive dog barking may be unlawful (in the UK at least).

OP should try and deal with the neighbour directly first but she can always make a noise complaint to the council.

Dogvmarmot · 19/07/2021 03:10

[quote Ratalie]@Dogvmarmot

No, people cannot do whatever they like on their own garden. Excessive dog barking may be unlawful (in the UK at least).

OP should try and deal with the neighbour directly first but she can always make a noise complaint to the council.[/quote]
I was being slightly sarcastic.

Ratalie · 19/07/2021 03:41

Well I did figure the cayote stuff was probably not sincere at least Grin

Original poster
soirritating · 19/07/2021 03:57

@Ratalie

Thank you for sharing that link, v helpful! Especially this part which I didn't know ..

"In law, a barking dog can be a 'statutory noise nuisance'. Under the Environmental Protection Act 1990 you (as the owner) could be taken to court if you do nothing to stop the nuisance. This could lead to a fine of up to £5,000."

Interesting.

OP posts:
Original poster
soirritating · 19/07/2021 04:09

Well. This is interesting. This is screenshot from my local council's website regarding reporting noise nuisance.

For those who suggested she might have to hear my baby crying too so I should "suck it up" or similar - as well as this being highly unlikely for reasons already mentioned, it would seem my local council agree that it's also not comparable to a barking dog in any case. They will investigate barking dog noise but not "reasonable noise coming from homes such as a baby crying".

I'm pleased my local council (and probably many other councils) agrees that to compare my baby crying and a dog barking excessively is ridiculous. Should have just looked this up to begin with to assess whether or not I was being unreasonable! Smile

Out of control dog disturbing baby in garden - help?!
OP posts:
Original poster
soirritating · 19/07/2021 04:10

Thanks @Ratalie you may have just saved my sanity Wink

OP posts:
Original poster
soirritating · 19/07/2021 04:16

Also. To the pp who suggested I may not be "coping well" at the moment and therefore am directing my frustrations towards the barking dog (or words to that effect) - I was originally willing to consider this as a potential explanation when you said it.

But the fact that excessive barking dogs are reportable under the Environmental Protection Act would suggest that this isn't an issue unique to me - it's likely to bother many people, "coping well" with new baby or otherwise.

OP posts:
FootballisgoingtoRome · 19/07/2021 04:21

You sound like a joy OP you are out for a fight with your neighbours especially the way you get all superior when you talk about them. Lots of things are going to wake your precious baby up. God forbid what you will be like when someone cuts the grass and it’s your baby’s nap time. Entitlement .