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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU disabled DC and school trip

333 replies

Manic20201 · 11/07/2021 00:10

My DC class is going on a school trip at the end of term. They school are refusing to take them due to disability ( tube fed )
We have had medical clearance from health team and she has a trained 1–1.
AIBU to believe ( this is now nearly 4 years of never attending a school trip ) that it’s getting ridiculous. She is so sad about it and waited a long time to go.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 11/07/2021 00:11

What are the school's reasons?

SisterMonicaJoansHabit · 11/07/2021 00:13

That's appalling. She's being excluded from something which is really important to kids.

Hellocatshome · 11/07/2021 00:13

Surely they can't do that? Is it a day trip or residential? Is the 1 to 1 going on the trip? If its a problem with the 1 to 1 being available could you offer to go?

Original poster
Manic20201 · 11/07/2021 00:14

There wasn’t really any reasons as such
Just for “ medical reasons “ she is not tube fed etc at school.

OP posts:
NoSquirrels · 11/07/2021 00:15

That’s awful. They should be planning with your DC in mind from the start.

Original poster
Manic20201 · 11/07/2021 00:15

The 1– 1 is attending the trip, everytime its the same thing if I don’t go then she can’t go and the 1-1 then attends in numbers.
The one I did attend the 1-1 was needed for numbers.
I can’t attend the trip this time though.

OP posts:
lakesummer · 11/07/2021 00:15

Can you go with her to assist?

I understand that isn't great for dc but at least she would get to go.

WorraLiberty · 11/07/2021 00:16

Ok, well you need them to clarify exactly why in an email.

Then you can fight your child's corner and if they still persist, take it further as without a good reason, it's discrimination.

NoSquirrels · 11/07/2021 00:16

@Manic20201

There wasn’t really any reasons as such Just for “ medical reasons “ she is not tube fed etc at school.
Escalate the complaint.

You have to be your child’s advocate here.

Cherrysoup · 11/07/2021 00:17

Kick up a HUGE fuss. I took 2 wheelchair users, one who has a stoma/catheter which needs manually emptying but his 1:1 came, so it wasn’t an issue.

Original poster
Manic20201 · 11/07/2021 00:17

I would if I could but I really can’t and I also think this sets them up for always relying on me when I’m not sure they are allowed to refuse based on parent not being able to attend.

OP posts:
NoSquirrels · 11/07/2021 00:17

@Manic20201

The 1– 1 is attending the trip, everytime its the same thing if I don’t go then she can’t go and the 1-1 then attends in numbers. The one I did attend the 1-1 was needed for numbers. I can’t attend the trip this time though.
The 1-1 is there to be 1-1 with your child, not to count for the others. They can get other parent helpers for the children who don’t need specialist attention.
WorraLiberty · 11/07/2021 00:18

@Manic20201

The 1– 1 is attending the trip, everytime its the same thing if I don’t go then she can’t go and the 1-1 then attends in numbers. The one I did attend the 1-1 was needed for numbers. I can’t attend the trip this time though.
I can’t attend the trip this time though.

And not for the last 4 years either?

converseandjeans · 11/07/2021 00:18

What is the trip? It seems unfair that the 1-1 allocated to your daughter - presumably funded for her - is being used to help out and make up numbers. What do they expect you to do with your daughter for the day?

WorraLiberty · 11/07/2021 00:19

Sorry, I don't know where the rest of my post went.

If you're never able to attend the trips and there is no medical reason why the 1-1 shouldn't take care of your child, you need them to explain in writing.

Then take it further.

Original poster
Manic20201 · 11/07/2021 00:19

For example of previous trips she couldn’t attend

A local visit to a local business which was on the same road as the school.

End of school year trip to the park

Etc you get the point

OP posts:
Original poster
Manic20201 · 11/07/2021 00:20

I have explained to the school and sent a signed hospital letter from hospital specially stating there is no medical reason she can’t attend.

OP posts:
NoSquirrels · 11/07/2021 00:20

@Manic20201

For example of previous trips she couldn’t attend

A local visit to a local business which was on the same road as the school.

End of school year trip to the park

Etc you get the point

Head, then Governors.

And consider looking for a new school.

WorraLiberty · 11/07/2021 00:20

@Manic20201

For example of previous trips she couldn’t attend

A local visit to a local business which was on the same road as the school.

End of school year trip to the park

Etc you get the point

And on those occasions what were the reasons given?
DeathByWalkies · 11/07/2021 00:21

YANBU

Can you contact IPSEA for some advice?

Original poster
Manic20201 · 11/07/2021 00:21

Worra it can be difficult for me to attend trips I have done but I work etc have medical supply deliveries which can’t be missed.
I attended in the past.

OP posts:
Original poster
Manic20201 · 11/07/2021 00:22

The excuses tend to be

“ health and safety “ “ medical reasons “
“ safe guarding “ or similar.

OP posts:
RubyGoat · 11/07/2021 00:23

If your DD doesn't go, presumably her 1-1 won't be able to go. So they will still need to get other adults to help with the numbers, logically? Push them to clarify exactly why your DD can't attend, what aspect of her disability presents a problem.

PRabbit · 11/07/2021 00:25

You need to find out the reason. Maybe insurance won’t cover your DC. Or they aren’t willing to take take liability for what could happen. You can’t argue unless you know the reason.

NoSquirrels · 11/07/2021 00:26

@Manic20201

The excuses tend to be

“ health and safety “ “ medical reasons “
“ safe guarding “ or similar.

They need to spell out very clearly exactly what they mean by this in detail. Step by step. Exactly what the potential issues are. So that then you can offer them solutions or force them to reassess.