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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should the GP not have been able to do this?

206 replies

ohthatbloodycat · 09/07/2021 20:35

This strikes me as a bit ridiculous, but do correct me if you feel I'm in the wrong.
My 15 year old got her ears pierced as a birthday treat a week ago. I think the earring on one side had been fitted a bit too tightly; it had always been tender, but got sore last night. My plan had been to go to the piercing place in the morning to ask their advice.
This morning when my daughter woke up, the stud part at the front had completely embedded itself in her lobe. All you could see was the butterfly sticking out the back. Her ear became swollen and very painful, unsurprisingly enough. I should add that she cleaned them each day religiously, and the other ear was fine.
Because the skin had closed over it in the night, I wasn't able to pull it out myself. I phoned our GP surgery for some advice. The receptionist checked and then came back to say that the GP wouldn't do it, and the practice nurse was busy all day. I then had the faff of phoning 111 (on GP's advice) and they eventually sorted me out an appointment at the A&E hospital miles away. There was no time to take the bus (I don't have a car currently), so I spent £20 on a taxi there. And then the bus on the way home. My daughter wasn't numbed up, or anything like that. The nurse warned her that it would be painful, as he pulled the stud through the skin of her ear. And it was, but over quickly thankfully!
This seemed like a palaver for a simple procedure, that surely the GP could have carried out. Rather than leave the paediatric A&E department to sort it out, particularly as Covid cases have risen in my city. Confused
Even the NHS phone operator sounded surprised that they had refused to do it.
AIBU?

OP posts:
misskick · 09/07/2021 22:14

My daughter also had to go to a@e to have her earring out. Not all piercing place will do it once embedded.

Original poster
ohthatbloodycat · 09/07/2021 22:14

Have you even read the thread? If I'd been able to do it myself, I would have done. I'm not a squeamish person at all, but didn't know what I was doing and didn't want to cause my daughter more pain.

OP posts:
BungleandGeorge · 09/07/2021 22:15

Just out of interest what type of earrings are meant to go in childrens’ newly pierced ears?

Zilla1 · 09/07/2021 22:15

Able to, yes as would any practice nurse/NP, minor injuries unit, A and E and many parents though I realise that might have been scary. Should they? They are probably not contracted to do this. Back in the day, they might have done it anyway and some would though if in England, they are probably under lots of time pressure and won't have appointments available instantly. Many GPs have been stretched delivering vaccinations until the government screwed them over and some have pulled out. Many in England are now planning for September booster and 'flu programmes. Glad it's sorted for your DC, OP.

Glad its sorted.

Zilla1 · 09/07/2021 22:17

@BungleandGeorge IME plain studs but the key thing is that they are made out of surgical steel or solid precious metal but be careful that the butterfly/clip isn't an allergenic metal as this often causes problems hence the reaction presents initially at the back of the ear.

NoLeafClover · 09/07/2021 22:18

RosesAndHellebores, in fairness, your GP should have declined to pierce your ears. I highly doubt that any GP would have the correct equipment just lying around. If you ended up with infected piercings, either the Doctor's cleanliness was sub-par, or your aftercare was.

I'm glad going to Claire's worked out for your DD. However I'd still urge anyone reading this, with a mind to having their child's ears pierced in Claire's to seriously reconsider. A friend worked there at 17. The training was being shown a printout of an ear on a piece of cardboard, and how to aim the piercing gun and pull the trigger. Then a day of practicing doing the same. The 'piercing station' was never properly cleaned, the gun was wiped down with alcohol wipes (as couldn't be autoclaved). She once had to physically hold down a crying toddler after their first ear had been pierced, whilst her colleague pierced the second one. She objected, but her manager insisted, as the parent wanted both ears done, regardless of the toddler's crying. She quit after that.

Doghead · 09/07/2021 22:18

Another OP who posts on here and then gets stroppy when people don't agree with her. sigh

EarringsandLipstick · 09/07/2021 22:18

@ohthatbloodycat

Thanks. It has been a shit day all in, and I regret posting on here, and some of the replies have got me down. I don't think I understand Mumsnet very well at times. Ah well, at least her ear is now sorted, which is the main thing. Talk about a birthday treat gone wrong!
Ah I'm sorry OP. MN is a weird place at times.

I thought you were clear, followed the right steps & A&E was the right call.

I also don't subscribe to the hysteria around ear piercing that goes on here. No, it's not child abuse, yes, make sure the DC is old enough to to manage, and I disagree that all chains are terrible as implied.

I hope you can rest now & that you & DD feel much better now everything is sorted!

Original poster
ohthatbloodycat · 09/07/2021 22:18

Good question! I'm clearly no expert, but I do suspect that the studs my daughter was given were too small for 'starter' earrings. Even the nurse we saw suggested putting a bigger stud in straightaway! Hmm However we've decided to cut our losses with this one, and leave piercing for another day in the distant! future Smile

OP posts:
Zilla1 · 09/07/2021 22:18

I realise many parents would have been worried about doing permanent damage as well as causing the child pain, OP.

Diverseopinions · 09/07/2021 22:19

I think you are right. A very inflamed ear could need treatment. You could have pushed it in further, by mistake, and made it worse or severed something: as far as you know, perhaps because, like me, you are not knowing a lot about medical matters/anatomy. Also, if DD was cleaning it, and you know she was, you have added reason to think there could be more to it, and something more going on than just normal soreness, such as bacteria in there from the piercing.

A GP sounds right to me, between a pharmacist and an A and E doctor. It is a shame we can't see these at the surgery, or a nurse. I guess the A and E staff will be gaining experience of different conditions, if more people are going there , now that we are being advised to go . If 111 tell you to go there, don't stress yourself and just go.

FlyingBattie · 09/07/2021 22:19

@BungleandGeorge

Just out of interest what type of earrings are meant to go in childrens’ newly pierced ears?
My piercer said he only ever uses hoop earrings- recommended to change them to whatever you like after 6-8 weeks. The hoops are better for swelling and draining fluid from the wound.
AnyOldPrion · 09/07/2021 22:19

It has been a shit day all in, and I regret posting on here, and some of the replies have got me down. I don't think I understand Mumsnet very well at times.

Mumsnet can be brutal, even in the areas where it’s meant to be kind anc helpful… which is not the case in AIBU.

Hope tomorrow is a better day for you.

Original poster
ohthatbloodycat · 09/07/2021 22:19

@Doghead

Another OP who posts on here and then gets stroppy when people don't agree with her. sigh
Not at all. Just frustrated when people make daft accusations and don't read the full thread.
OP posts:
SofiaMichelle · 09/07/2021 22:20

I don't think I understand Mumsnet very well at times.

It's simple enough - if you're wrong you'll be told you're wrong rather than getting a load of "awww hun" replies.

EarringsandLipstick · 09/07/2021 22:20

@Doghead

Another OP who posts on here and then gets stroppy when people don't agree with her. sigh
Stop it.

OP has not got stroppy. She's had some arsey OTT replies, unnecessarily picking apart her story.

It's possible to tell someone they ABU (if that's what you think) without being nasty or overly dramatic about it, as some posters have been.

Sweettea1 · 09/07/2021 22:21

You never said in original post you tried the piecer you say you was going to go but then this happened 🤔 an no it doesn't sound like a GPS job I wouldn't of even thought about gp I would of went straight a an e.

Katy4321 · 09/07/2021 22:21

I had this happen to one of my ears, pierced at Claire's accessories (no internet in those days and friends at the time had used them without problem). I was extremely careful cleaning it, but ear seriously swelled up. No chance of getting it out myself. I went to a, and e, waited maybe 4 hours which was fine, as not urgent and when they had a couple of minutes they whipped it out (so used minimal time).
I was studying biomedical science at the time and a lot about serious infections, and something like a highly infected ear with a foreign object in it removed by force could potentially release bacteria into the blood system. So think think what OP did was perfectly reasonable and they got medical advice. Hope the ear is ok, sorry it happened

Original poster
ohthatbloodycat · 09/07/2021 22:22

@FlyingBattie

That's really interesting. My daughter would have liked hoops, but Superdrug said they don't use them as they can get caught on things more easily.

OP posts:
NumberTheory · 09/07/2021 22:22

I think YABU, not because you should have gone to the piercer or jumped through whatever other hoop random MNers who treat AIBU as sport have thought up, but because I think your expectations for GPs are probably a bit out of date. Even though they are "General" Practitioners, GPs clinic seemed to have specialised roles a lot more in recent decades by bringing in non-Dr qualified HCPs to do a significant range of procedures that are often better when done with the sort of skill that comes from repeated practice. And when you have other people doing those tasks for you, you become much less good at them yourself because you don't get any practice. The GP may have feared they'd be as clumsy as you feared you be.

So if the person at the surgery who has those skills, the practice nurse in this case, had no availability then sending you elsewhere makes sense. It wasn't that the clinic wasn't able to deal with that type of issue, it was that they didn't have the capacity when you needed it.

Zilla1 · 09/07/2021 22:22

FWIW, OP, are you sure it's the size of the earring or could it have been a reaction to the metal if it went sore before closing over the earring? If it's not too late and there is still some semblance of a piercing left there, I'd try with some surgical steel earrings and salt baths if she'd rather not repeat the piercing and healing process in the future. If she's 15, she'll have healed before the return to school in September or August if Scottish?

EarringsandLipstick · 09/07/2021 22:23

@SofiaMichelle

I don't think I understand Mumsnet very well at times.

It's simple enough - if you're wrong you'll be told you're wrong rather than getting a load of "awww hun" replies.

Yeah. That's fine.

But actually OP got jumped on by some claiming her story was invented, and repeatedly yelled at for going to Claire's, even after she said, a few times, that it was Superdrug.

That's lazy posters who CBA to read OP's posts.

FlyingBattie · 09/07/2021 22:23

@SofiaMichelle

I don't think I understand Mumsnet very well at times.

It's simple enough - if you're wrong you'll be told you're wrong rather than getting a load of "awww hun" replies.

Not at all. There is a very vocal "Never go to A+E unless you are almost dead" narrative on here. It's dangerous. A+Es should have methods for dealing with time wasters, but random people shouldn't be telling people if they are sick enough to need A+E or not.
EarringsandLipstick · 09/07/2021 22:24

@Sweettea1

You never said in original post you tried the piecer you say you was going to go but then this happened 🤔 an no it doesn't sound like a GPS job I wouldn't of even thought about gp I would of went straight a an e.
She said she went to the piercer in her third post. It was hardly a drip-feed.
RickiTarr · 09/07/2021 22:24

Not at all. Just frustrated when people make daft accusations and don't read the full thread.

You have to put every tiny detail in your OP or we eat you alive. Wink Thems the rules. We’re vipers. 🐍

We’ve all done it OP. I started an epic bun fight about Kate Middleton without even trying once. Grin