AIBU to not want to buy presents for staff?

[Pigtailsandall]

I manage a small team of 8 people in a public sector organisation, and I'm the most junior of managers so I don't have a huge salary (for the level of work I do). For Christmas, everyone got a card and a bottle of bubbly. It set me back around £90 which was ok at the time. However since that, DH has taken a pay cut and moved to a start-up which he loves, but the salary is crappy. Money is a bit tight, and in the next 4 weeks 3 of the staff have birthdays. Most managers get something for each staff as a birthday gift and I'm reluctant as money's tight. AIBU to just get a nice card with a thoughtful message? I'm almost certain one person will be miffed and complain, but I can't really get a present for one person and not the others.

I think it's quite difficult to go against precedent, but if you are sure you don't want to do gifts, then I think you need to explain to everybody in your team

Or make them a cake?

If you not going to do it for these 3 your best stopping all together tbh.

Box of chocolates and earlier finish time would be fab.

pigtailsandall I think you should view it as a positive thing that you're the one dealing with this slightly odd and definitely unreasonable tradition. As a leader in your business if you make a stand here and change the practice those coming after you will thank you! This sort of nonsense only perpetuates because nobody has the balls to say no.

Nevermind the cash, I could absolutely not afford the time or bandwidth to remember and buy things, it's extra complication that nobody needs.

Do they ever get you anything?

This is bonkers, just don’t do it. I’m always baffled by stuff like this happening.

I wouldn’t give an early finish either, it will create more problems than it solves once word gets round other teams or worse still your seniors get annoyed. Regardless of what they think they aren’t entitled to anything for their birthday from you or the business!

One Head of Dept ( school) suggested we went for a Christmas meal out, we each paid for ourselves. At the end he said he had something for us…. One chocolate each. One. No card.

Card with a lottery ticket/scratchcard in it?

Not one of my colleagues has ever acknowledged my birthday, let alone any managers. I wouldn't expect anything, I didn't know this was a thing! So I don't think it's unreasonable to not buy anything.

Could you bake cupcakes?

@PeggyArmstrong

Card with a lottery ticket/scratchcard in it?

I did this at Xmas. The staff loved it, it created a bit of excitement & a couple of them even had a small win ☺️

I think in this situation staff often vaguely think it's not the manager's own money, it's a sort of petty cash / expenses thing. So you maybe need to make it known that you're a bit skint at the moment so it's cards only from now on. Don't for heaven's sake start baking cakes for them as that's a huge faff for you. Leaving early or coming in late is a great idea!

I worked public sector for my whole career and never received a bean from a manager. A card with a thoughtful message would have been really lovely.

Thanks all for the ideas, baking is definitely off the cards as I hate it and I'm terrible at it. All the staff know there's no money in the organisation for this sort if thing - can you imagine if people found out that their tax money was used to get Judy at Human resources some birthday flowers? - but I am thinking that people can finish at 1pm on the Friday of their birthday week. I'm wary of agreeing to their actual birthday date as a rule as it might be a busy day, but Fridays are generally the quietest days.
Maybe we'll do a pot luck lunch gathering or similar- I'll see if they're keen on that sort of thing.
And yes, the rule will obviously change for everyone so it'll be equal

God I hate this expectation on managers to do something for birthday and Christmas. Get them a card and if you can facilitate an early finish that’s enough.
Don’t get anything else as it may not be appreciated and then you’ve wasted your money on nothing. And if anyone queries it make sure they know there is no source of slush fund for this. You don’t have to disclose any personal details like saying you’re broke though.

That sounds great! I personally would never expect a present from my manager and would be mortified if they had to go short to get me something. I'd 100% rather an early finish on a Friday than a bottle of wine or some chocolates xx

As a manager I would never expect to have to spend my own money on a birthday present for a staff member. That's ridiculous. Likewise, if I was a team member I'd feel considerably embarrassed if I knew my manager was buying me a gift from their own pocket. It's completely unnecessary. A half day's holiday or flexibility in my working hours for the day would be appreciated, but no more.

Public sector here too, yes I buy my team chocolates but when it was a bigger team more like £5 or £6 ones unless it's a birthday ending in zero.

The early finish I could imagine in my former office being reported to HR by others whose managers wouldn't do the same and it would be seen as giving away company time and probably get the manager into trouble. (I may be quiet flexible with my team!)
We used to be given half an hour towards team lunches and the rest had to come out of flexi, or people going to the Christmas lunch could count the time as work but if you didn't want to go you couldn't finish early instead.

I think most people would love a half day off.

If you really want to get a gift then just spend £3-4 on some flowers or small box of chocs.

I think the half day off might be better. I think asking people in general to spend money on gifts for staff is not good at any time, but even more so when many are in families who may have someone who has lost their job.

Be aware that a half day off has a monetary value to the business and it’s not just as easy as saying off your trot on the Friday. Don’t do it without checking with seniors (who will say no because it’s bonkers) - you’re basically creating a birthday privilege half day and that could have lasting implications for the business. Imagine person moves to another team and demands their birthday half day off. You might find yourself on a disciplinary quite quickly - public sector tends to be quite hot on these things.

Well I’ve worked in the public sector for 40 years and always got a small present from my manager and did the same for my staff when I was a manager. So it’s clearly not an unknown thing.
However having worked in HR do not give them time off, you will get in trouble for setting such a precedent.
Sorry but this is how the public sector differs from the private sector.

@NeverDropYourMoonCup

How much do your staff earn compared to you?

If they're on next to bugger all as AAs, an EO or HEO saying they're too skint for a birthday box of chocolates is quite insulting.

(I realise grades/titles may well have changed in the last few decades, but the principle is the same when you're a grade 7 saying you're too skint to get something for a grade 2)

It's not up to OP to spend her own money regardless of what staff earn

I cannot believe that any member of staff would expect you to know their bloody birthday, let alone pay for a present out of your own money. That is absurd. Knock it on the head. If anyone whinges (pathetic brats if they do) then just tell them it's no longer practice in your department.