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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder what more she wants?

40 replies

LemonSherbetFancies · 07/07/2021 17:38

I accidentally messed a friend around yesterday changing plans a good few times. I could tell she was pissed off by her short response to my text. I know she isn't herself lately as she has had some bad news regarding her health.
When I saw her at the school today I apologised but she changed the subject. I then kept asking her if she was OK to try and get her to admit that she did have an issue with me. She snapped at me telling me that she was fine, shook her head and walked off. Aibu to ask what more she wants when I have given an apology?

OP posts:

Notapheasantplucker · 07/07/2021 19:17

YABU. What a dick.

MotionActivatedDog · 07/07/2021 19:17

What she wants is you not to dick her about when you’ve made plans.

Why did you need her to tell You why she was pissed of? You knew why. Did you expect her just to be suddenly fine with you because you said sorry? That’s not what sorry is for.

BlueSurfer · 07/07/2021 19:19

If this is genuine, I’d be surprised if she still considers you a friend.

grapewine · 07/07/2021 19:21

First you change "a few times", and then you keep going on about it, pushing her when she changed the subject. You even know she has health issues.

You're being so incredibly unreasonable. I'd have left too. Annoying as fuck. If this is a reverse, you're still annoying for posting that way.

ApolloandDaphne · 07/07/2021 19:24

I call reverse too.

iolaus · 07/07/2021 19:26

You have apologised - she doesn't need to accept that apology

As to what she wants - it's for you to stop bugging her and pretending to care - you don't accidentally change arrangements a 'good few times'

Cocomarine · 07/07/2021 19:31

Fucking hell, leave her ALONE!
Your post makes ME want to snap at.

How can you “accidentally” mess someone around, anyway?

CuriousOrangee · 07/07/2021 19:32

What do you mean that you messed her around and changed plans a few times?

I'd be pissed off too. She doesn't have to let it go immediately.

LowlandLucky · 07/07/2021 19:40

Sorry but you sound like hard work. What did you want her to do ? Did you want her to snap at you so you could feel better by blaming her for being snappy ?

BrilliantBetty · 07/07/2021 19:43

Why do you think an apology makes up for messing a friend around repeatedly changing plans, completely wasting her time.
And then to bug her in to a reaction was completely ridiculous.

FourTeaFallOut · 07/07/2021 19:47

If she has the good grace to operate on 'least said soonest mended' to move past your crappy behaviour then you should have the good grace to keep your mouth shut about it.

LtDansleg · 07/07/2021 19:49

Reverse

Ninkanink · 07/07/2021 19:49

It’s a reverse.

FourTeaFallOut · 07/07/2021 19:53

Oh I hate reverse threads. Why insult the people who you are seeking advice from?

MadMadMadamMim · 07/07/2021 19:57

How do you accidentally mess a friend around by changing plans a good few times?

I mean, that's being a total twat, isn't it? Nothing fucking accidental about it. You decided your needs were greater than hers.

Shitty thing to do to a friend anyway, never mind someone you know has had bad news about their health.

She was pretty gracious not to tell you to fuck right off when you said sorry at the school gates. You don't get to say sorry and then demand someone accepts it, if they are still pissed off. You kept asking if she was ok to try and force her to pretend everything was fine.

It wasn't and she walked away from you.

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