Gosh not sure where to begin, except I am 55, single, live in Dorset and have a good job, which I have had for 14 years. My mother is elderly and lives in Wales. Yes, she has some memory problems but keeps her house and herself spotless cooks healthy food and walks about 3 miles a day. Yes, my mother panics over the slightest thing, she has always been like that. I visit as much as I can, pay her phone bills and organize online shopping for her when needed, I do jobs around her house, or organise other people to do it when needed. I have offered to help her move closer to me and help her manage her finances, all of which she refuses. She assures me she has a doctor's advice that she does not have dementia. The trouble is I have been bullied by a friend of hers, basically saying that I must give up my job and take care of her; this is not the first time this has happened; it is so very upsetting and stressful, I have ADHD and have been advised by my doctor to take care, my panic attacks get bad sometimes. AIBU in not wanting to give up my job, it is a good one and there are no comparable ones in the area of Wales that she lives in, I have been looking for three years - I just do not know what to do and am panicked over the bullying.