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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not understand the appeal of dogs as pets?

371 replies

Gardentiger · 06/07/2021 13:31

I just don't get it and would love to understand! As much as I like certain dogs I meet and think they are cute, the list of downsides is massive

  • they smell and make your house and car and clothes smell bad
-they can't be left alone for a length of a working day -behavioural problems and agression -if you get a barky one it can ruin your relationship with neighbours -the amount of time you have to spend training them -some seem to need constant supervision -chewing things and generally wrecking the housr -having to pick up warm freshly baked turds

I walked a friend of mines dog the other day and it was awful! He pulled on the lead the entire way, and kept trying to pee on people's doorsteps / flowerpots.

So what is the appeal!? I say this as an animal lover who has had pet rabbits, cats and hamsters in the past.

OP posts:
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6
kettlechips123 · 06/07/2021 14:09

@BarkingUpTheWrongRoseBush

i feel similarly about children...
Ha ha, same
Blossomtoes · 06/07/2021 14:11

They don't love unconditionally- they are nice to the person/people who keep them safe and fed

My dog’s favourite person is my son, who she sees about once a month and who has never fed her.

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 06/07/2021 14:11

@CharlieWorkCharlieSad
I can’t abide the smell they leave.
Some dogs also leave a waxy residue.

ForeverAintEnough3 · 06/07/2021 14:12

@DeloresPickleRick

Well dog owners will be along to tell you that their house doesn't smell, isn't flea infested and isn't covered in dog hair.

Since I started WFH I no longer have problems with asthma and a constant stuffy nose. I'm convinced it's because I'm no longer working with people covered in pet hair anymore.

I’d wager my house is far cleaner than yours @DeloresPickleRick and yes it has no hairs as my dog is non shedding and it has no fleas as dogs who are regularly given a flea treatment don’t have them.

I am very house proud and have a cleaner who comes x2 a week to clean and mop all floors and clean surfaces and polish and deep clean bathrooms. I also quarterly get professional carpet cleaners in to do all carpets and upholstery in the house and quarterly I pay for a deep clean of the house with skirting boards, light fittings, skylights etc all done. I have a robot hoover and mop which hoover and mops the main kitchen/dining/living areas twice daily and this is the only area the dog goes and he is not allowed on any furniture. I also clean the house myself once a week. That’s

I’m amazed you attribute your relief from asthma from pet hair on colleagues clothes ignoring the actual known causes of asthma such as traffic pollution, air conditioning units, pollen and so on.

Have you a confirmed result via blood tests that your asthma results directly from dog allergens or is that something you made up same as all houses with dogs apparently being covered with fleas? Confused

Chickenexpert · 06/07/2021 14:12

I wouldn't have any pets but I like most animals so I can see why people have them, they obviously don't see/don't care about the negatives like I do and they have a desire there that I don't. Same with children, sports and pickled eggs… Grin

Salanda · 06/07/2021 14:13

I think you’ve listed some of the worst traits that dogs could possibly have @Gardentigerdogs Many dogs won’t have all or any of those traits. It also depends on your lifestyle - not being able to leave a dog alone for a working day isn’t a problem if you don’t work, don’t work full time, work from home etc. And if you’re generally an outdoors person then going out to walk your dog isn’t a chore.

I have a dog. She’s not barky, she’s friendly to other dogs, she sleeps most of the day (doesn’t need lots of exercise), she’s very short haired so doesn’t smell (we also have wooden floors not carpets so easier to keep clean IMO). I worked from home part of the week even pre-pandemic and DH works shifts so it’s much easier for us too. She’s so far from the nightmare dog you describe in your post OP.

What I get out of it? Having a dog encourages me to go out for a walk every day (which was great when I was WFH pre-pandemic and most people were in the office, and then it was great again during lockdown). Getting out of the house and a bit of exercise is good for my mental and physical health. She also goes running with me.

Having a dog is really sociable - I live next to a big city park and have made lots of friends from dog walking. Even if I don’t bump into people I know when I’m out, I will more often that not have a bit of a chat with other people. People in eg shops/the pub also often start up a conversation when they see you have a dog with you.

Having a dog is a constant companion, one that is always in a good mood - many dogs are just super happy creatures. She’s happy to see me even if I just take the bins out. It’s hard to be in a bad mood when you’re hanging out with a happy wavy dog. She’s very affectionate too, she’ll sit with her head on my lap when I’m watching tv etc.

Having a dog as a child also massively reduces your risk of asthma and allergies. It gets kids out and about in the outdoors. Having pets including dogs are proven to help reduce stress.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 06/07/2021 14:13

People with dogs who say their houses don't smell are lies or nose blind. There's very little you can do to manage dog smell. Especially when it's been wet

Tanfastic · 06/07/2021 14:13

I lost my 15 year old dog a couple of weeks ago and I miss him so much. House is just not the same. He did wonders for my mental health.

WhenISnappedAndFarted · 06/07/2021 14:14

My DM suffers from severe depression. She has two dogs and they're her best friends. They are a reason for her to get out and get out of bed and do things. I'd be really concerned about her if she didn't have them.

Yes they smell, there's dog fur everywhere but my DM's mental health is so much better and that far outweighs everything else.

SmashingBlouson · 06/07/2021 14:14

me seeing as every other dog I see in the park seems to want to clatter my kids over (I swear DS has some sort of dog radar as they always run up to him and get in his face) and bothers us all as some fuckwit owner shouts from 100m away "it's ok, he's friendly".

Oh God I hate that. My eldest son got jumped on a couple of times by dog when he was really little and has been cautious ever since. To him they were bigger than him and certainly not being "friendly". If it was my son doing that to another child I would have got a filthy look, but dogs (or their owners) seem to get away with that. Likewise if I just let my son shit in the street or make loads of noise, I would get shouted at by members of the public, but it's perfectly ok for dogs to do that! There seems to be plenty of bad parents, but no bad dog owners.

Sloaneslone · 06/07/2021 14:15

@FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop

People with dogs who say their houses don't smell are lies or nose blind. There's very little you can do to manage dog smell. Especially when it's been wet
Fortunately I have some very good friends and family, who would have no hesitation in telling me if my house smelled of dog

Especially, my mother. Its her pet hate and she wouldn't even come round if there was dog hair everywhere or it smelled of dogs.

Blossomtoes · 06/07/2021 14:15

So sorry @Tanfastic. They leave such a huge hole in your life when you lose them. 💐

CharlieWorkCharlieSad · 06/07/2021 14:16

@FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop

People with dogs who say their houses don't smell are lies or nose blind. There's very little you can do to manage dog smell. Especially when it's been wet
My house probably stinks! But it's worth it in my eyes!

And @AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken. That's completely fair enough! My dog is super fluffy so no wax to contend with. Lots of hair though!

No ones refused to visit my house yet 😬

Chickpea22 · 06/07/2021 14:17

Our dog saved me. She is all the things that you listed but I adore her and that outweighs the negatives. I totally understand why you don’t see the appeal though.

CharlieWorkCharlieSad · 06/07/2021 14:17

@Tanfastic

I lost my 15 year old dog a couple of weeks ago and I miss him so much. House is just not the same. He did wonders for my mental health.
Oh I'm so sorry @Tanfastic.Flowers
HumphreyCobblers · 06/07/2021 14:18

I got a dog just before the first lockdown, mainly because I thought it would be good for my youngest child who is non verbal.

I really love the dog! She is the best thing that ever happened to our family. It came as a complete surprise to me exactly how nice it would be to have a dog that is so cute and funny and soft and excited to see me after a ten minute absence!

She does smell a bit but is small enough to easily bath if the whiff gets too much, but she doesn’t shed at all.

Basically all the hassle (and there are lots of slightly annoying things) are worth it due to the positives.

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 06/07/2021 14:18

@Sloaneslone my friend got a dog and made me promise to tell her if her house started to smell and I just can't bring myself to say it 😬 crap I know but she never asks and I don't like saying "sorry you're house just STINKS" 🤣

AlternativePerspective · 06/07/2021 14:19

These threads always turn nasty and there’s really no need.

If you don’t like dogs then fine, don’t go on to dog threads to read about them, and don’t go out and buy a puppy. It ain’t that hard.

Invariably badly trained dogs are the fault of the owner, and as a general rule dogs do not savagely attack unprovoked, usually there is a reason why, even if we don’t know it. Keeping dogs and children apart shouldn’t just be about protecting the children from the dogs, it is about protecting the dogs from the children.

I have 2 dogs. One is a retired guide dog, and the other one is a dog who will be officially qualified as a guide dog next week, who I have spent the past nearly 6 weeks in training with. And before anyone says “ah but that’s a guide dog, that’s different,” err no it isn’t. Granted someone else did the destructive puppy phase and the training, but at the end of the day it’s still a dog. It still sheds hair and shits, I still have to pick up after it, actually I don’t, because guide dog owners are exempt by law, but I still do anyway, and I do have to pick up after them in my garden.

And they’re not just my dogs, and they’re not just my mobility aids. If they were just there for my mobility then I wouldn’t have kept every single one of my dogs when they retired, I would have sent them off to live somewhere else where they were no longer my responsibility.

And if I didn’t like dogs I could have just stuck with a cane. Many blind people do just that. But after nearly 5 years, some with serious illness, then lockdown and waiting for a dog, I have finally got my life back. And I couldn’t have done it without my dogs.

Oh and, if they’d told me I couldn’t keep my retired dog when I got the new one I would have waited.

PS: was going to put up a picture of the new dog but he’s not qualified yet so it wouldn’t necessarily be appropriate ATM.

Cavalierqueen · 06/07/2021 14:21

I disagree although 3, yes 3 pairs of Gucci shoes have suffered

ForeverAintEnough3 · 06/07/2021 14:21

And the prize for trotting out that old ‘why are you on mumsnet then’ goes to the snarky nasty @FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop

The clearly a parenting site is the place for you 🤣

BINGO the thread is now complete

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 06/07/2021 14:21

@SmashingBlouson

me seeing as every other dog I see in the park seems to want to clatter my kids over (I swear DS has some sort of dog radar as they always run up to him and get in his face) and bothers us all as some fuckwit owner shouts from 100m away "it's ok, he's friendly".

Oh God I hate that. My eldest son got jumped on a couple of times by dog when he was really little and has been cautious ever since. To him they were bigger than him and certainly not being "friendly". If it was my son doing that to another child I would have got a filthy look, but dogs (or their owners) seem to get away with that. Likewise if I just let my son shit in the street or make loads of noise, I would get shouted at by members of the public, but it's perfectly ok for dogs to do that! There seems to be plenty of bad parents, but no bad dog owners.

There MUST be something about certain people that attracts dogs. It's not just the odd dog but the vast majority are all over my son and he's only 5. Sometimes they stick their nose on his crotch and it scares the bejesus out of him.

I always physically get them away now if the owner isn't close, and as soon as I can, even if they're just approaching him which has resulted in a few comments from pissed off owners but frankly I don't care. He's terrified of dogs as a result Sad

Salanda · 06/07/2021 14:22

@FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop

People with dogs who say their houses don't smell are lies or nose blind. There's very little you can do to manage dog smell. Especially when it's been wet
It really does depend on the dog. A long haired dog that goes swimming in ponds and rolls in mud will be very different to a short coated dog that doesn’t like to get wet. Depends on other things like dental health as well (bad breath or completely non-smelly) and digestive health and diet (farty or not!). It also depends on the house and the rules (carpets or wooden floors, where the dog is allowed to go etc).
FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 06/07/2021 14:22

@ForeverAintEnough3

And the prize for trotting out that old ‘why are you on mumsnet then’ goes to the snarky nasty *@FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop*

The clearly a parenting site is the place for you 🤣

BINGO the thread is now complete

Oh come off it it would be like me going into a site called Dogsnet and saying "I can't stand dogs".

Nasty lady I am 🤣🤣

PandorasMailbox · 06/07/2021 14:23

They're still preferable to most men.

Goldenfan · 06/07/2021 14:23

Most owners do know there hpuse smells etc its just on mumsnet that this is denied.

I have a 27kg golden retriever so yes my house smells and I have tumble weeds of fur everywhere. I don't care about that much. My house is clean and tidy enough and life is too short for me to worry about it.