To ask how to boost sex drive?

[Usernam15679086]

I'm 33 with DS3 and DD2. Since having kids, my sex drive has been very very low. My OH has always has a high sex drive and pre-kids, that was great. Probably having sex 4 or 5 times a week. Now it's once a week at best.

My OH does try to initiate sex but if I'm not feeling it mentally, it's just not the same. He can tell when I'm not that into it and so it tends not to go any further.

I don't really know the cause. TMI but things are a little different 'down there' since having kids and I am very conscious about that. I am also just a bit knackered all the time. I spend all day running around after the kids and all that entails.

Does anyone have any suggestions on how to get my sex drive back to how it was pre-kids? Is that even realistic or will it come back once the kids are less demanding?

Mine came back when the kids stopped being as demanding, I went back to work full time and didn't spend all day looking like shite and my DH tool steps to sort out permanent contraception to avoid ever having another child.

Are you using hormonal birth control? Low libido is a common side effect.

The kids are likely a factor too.

I'm definitely in the same boat and would love to know the answer.

Read erotica that appeals to your own particular fantasies or kinks.
Maca powder helps a lot of people also.
Make sure you do things that make you feel sexy. Whether that's a manicure or a special body scent.

A lot of women need to switch their brains into sex mode. Erotica to turn your mind on and then added things like scents, feeling good about yourself etc to really get you in the zone.

Also, unpopular opinion, your libido is a muscle. If you don't use it, you can lose it. Sometimes just doing it and making it a regular thing helps also.

I feel the same too, it's hard to see myself as a "sexual being" after being mom all day

I felt the same for a long time after having dc. Even when they were preschool age, they were still there, needing love and attention and when they'd gone to bed I felt like I had nothing left to give.

My dc are 8 and 10 now and my libido is only just beginning to come back just in time for the menopause! Hooray!

Me
Too - can’t think about it. Bad.