To not want to constantly give end of year donations to teachers?

[Bobbiebigbum]

I have 6 requests for donations for end of year donations for teachers and allied staff. This would come to about £30 which I kind of need. I don't get a big present every year for doing my paid job.. Am I just being a mardy cow for resenting the barrage of requests for money?

That is totally aside from all the constant PTA requests for money!

Just get your child to write a nice card. That’s literally all that’s needed, if anything.

YANBU at all. I am totally baffled by the teacher present thing for the same reasons.

This has been discussed at length on here and most teachers aren’t expecting anything at all. I hate that it’s sometimes seen as a ‘greedy teacher’ thing.

Why 6 requests?!

I nanny for children in a private school and it’s insane how competitive the giving gets. Yes its true these people are well off but the Whattsap one-upmamship of donations makes me cringe. If someone donates £50 the next has to do £100, or a £200 space NK voucher, a bottle of expensive champagne turns into a crate from someone else etc…

I still always get the kids to write a lovely card as it least it’s come from them and I’d not just about showing off.

I bet the teachers could do without some of the tat cluttering their homes.

In my dds we do a collection. Someone volunteers to coordinate and everyone gives a fiver/tenner and comments “thanks for organising and saving me the bother” and then most of the parents still buy chocs/flowers anyway!

I don’t need (or remember) the presents. But I have treasured every card from every student and when I am having a bad day, I reread them.

My favourites are the ones that reference a particular memory from that class (being pestered into chaperoning a trip organised by the students) or allude to an inside joke with the class (my love of red velvet cake) or just a sincere thank you (for believing in my student and pushing her to succeed - she did much better than others had predicted and was able to change her academic (and later career) plans as a result).

If you can make me feel like I have had a positive effect on someone’s life, I’ll cry and always remember them.

Genuinely the teachers are not behind this and do not need presents. A thank you note from the child is appreciated but not even necessary. Don't bother paying it .

As DS2 has 5 teachers, I'm just giving a box of biscuits to the staffroom. Also, do they still do this in secondary? DD's in year 8, and we were in lockdown at the end of year 7.

I agree with you and have done every year for the past 12 years as I've handed over my 1x then 2x then 3x now 4x £20 notes (private school - tenner not acceptable!). I don't mind a gesture/bottle of wine but I think it's got a bit out of hand.

Looking forward to reigning this in a bit as they age out into 6th form/uni (please don't tell me we do this for university lecturers as well now!!)

It's been said many a time - don't do it if you don't want to. In general, do you only give to receive? If no, then it's not relevant that you don't get a gift for your job. I happily contribute because unlike many peoples jobs, teachers are setting our children up for life. They spend an awful lot of time with my DC, caring for, nurturing and teaching them. The impact of a good teacher can't be underestimated, so I am incredibly grateful for them and like to show my appreciation.

Also, do they still do this in secondary?

I am a secondary teacher and can confirm that I very rarely get anything at all

@TheLovelinessOfDemons you will be pleased to hear that there is usually no collection for teachers in secondary school! In secondary, the children have a different teacher for every subject, and the relationship between teachers and parents is much less close than in primary school, so it doesn't seem to happen.

The head at my daughters primary school put in a request from the year 6 parents anticipating the collection.Won't say what it was at it will out me but it cost £200!Another member of staff asked for JL vouchers not a present.Rich area...they are used to getting huge collections.I was asked to contribute £30 when my daughter left by the parent collecting and got a raised eyebrow when I gave £10.Madness.

Thank you so much for the comments. That solves it then. I will get the children to write some thoughtful cards and get a box of chocolates for each.

Also I work I university and confirm we get nothing there either @Sonarl

I usually contribute to the class present, £5 each this year and my sons teacher is into the environment and gardening, so the parent involved got her gardening stuff all practical and she’ll use them with the kids in the school gardens. Not sure what my older son teacher got as his dad sorted that. I think contributing to a voucher is fine £5 if you can afford it but I used to take some flowers from the garden and a card.

Just a card is all you need. It is not necessary to give donations, and fret about gifts etc.

When I was teaching I was told we had to refuse all monetary gifts/anything that was bought and not obviously handmade or cards. Even cards that had cash in them we had to refuse the money and give it back.

Never have and never will. But then I rarely contribute to leaving gifts either unless I knew the person on a personal level. I do give to charity and I do help others. But I don't blindly contribute to collections.

A card with a little note in it is more than enough. The thought will be very much appreciated I promise.