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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

'Don't worry, he's friendly'

467 replies

PraiseBee · 04/07/2021 07:50

Too flippin friendly. Yet again, another dog running up to my four year old DC with a chunk of a branch in its mouth, firmly ignoring it's owners recall whilst they yell at me 'don't worry, Fluffyballs is friendly'. My DC loves dogs but hates dogs rushing up to him and is obviously scared. Large dogs are the same height as him and can easily knock him over. Imagine as an adult being rushed up to by a horse with a bit of tree trunk in its mouth trying to lick your face. I think most adults would be perturbed by this. It seems to be happening more often. Are dogs getting less well trained? I think the thing that makes my blood boil over is that the dog owners seem to think their dog is the most amazing thing ever so of course me and my DC want to bowled over by Fluffyballs. No we really don't and no, I give a shit what your dog is called. AIBU to be so annoyed by this happening every time we go to a children's park?!

OP posts:
Original poster
PraiseBee · 04/07/2021 11:14

@Lweji

I read many posts here as almost suggesting we should keep children on leads, should they approach their unleashed dogs. Grin
Ugh, fur babiesHmm
OP posts:
Original poster
PraiseBee · 04/07/2021 11:16

@vivainsomnia

And children top dogs, yes If a child was to hurt my dog, because he approached her and acted negligent whilst their parent did nothing, I can assure you that their kid wouldn't top my dog' need. I would push them if I had to.
I do not agree at all with this. You should not push a toddler. If your dog is as small as you say it is scoop it up. It's not the toddlers fault it isn't being helped to avoid the dog or approach carefully
OP posts:
GeistohneGrenzen · 04/07/2021 11:20

It's not just small children who are affected. This happened to me a few years ago after I'd not long had a hip replacement and was coming back from my first very cautious walk outside. Of necessity I was still on elbow crutches. I had to go over a narrow footbridge but could see a woman with two large dogs on extending leads coming across, so waited several yards away for them to clear the bridge and hopefully either draw her leads in or move well to the side. She did neither. She stopped as soon as she was on the footpath and the dogs were prancing around and when I asked her to move them aside I also got the 'o they won't hurt you, they only want to be friendly'. How dense can you be?

VeganVeal · 04/07/2021 11:22

In fairness they did say it was friendly, much worse when they shout dont touch him or look into his eyes, he'll rip your face off

Ref the sloppy kiss, oh yes please

rantymcrantface66 · 04/07/2021 11:22

I do not agree at all with this. You should not push a toddler. If your dog is as small as you say it is scoop it up. It's not the toddlers fault it isn't being helped to avoid the dog or approach carefully

I agree with this too, if my dog is under control I can easily protect it (and the child) from a toddler or child. I see it as my responsibility as a dog owner.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 04/07/2021 11:23

@Lweji

I read many posts here as almost suggesting we should keep children on leads, should they approach their unleashed dogs. Grin
Both should be on leash😂
ladybee28 · 04/07/2021 11:24

My dog's off-leash until I spot another person, then he's straight on to the leash until appropriate to let him off again.

Unfortunately I live in a country where they're even less dog-savvy than many owners in the UK and we CONSTANTLY have dogs bombing up to us, jumping all over us, making my poor old boy get tangled in his leash trying to get away, and sometimes even growling at us and behaving aggressively.

I've started carrying a can of pressurised air and they get a good blow in the face now - usually sends most of them off. I think people are starting to know me as 'that woman' now and IDGAF.

DontJumpInTheFountain · 04/07/2021 11:24

We live next to a big park and I spent many happy hours there with toddler DS until one day a 'friendly' dog bounded up to him, knocked him over and then stood over him. Yes, the dog wasn't being aggressive, but my son was terrified. After that he didn't want to go back to the park. It took a lot of work to get him over it, and I was so angry that something we enjoyed doing had turned into a stressful experience for all of us. He eventually stopped crying every time I said we were going for a walk but his fear of dogs has persisted for years. He is still incredibly wary and hates it when dogs run up to us. I can't believe people dismiss this problem - the repercussions of one seemingly small incident can have a real impact on a child for a long time.

vivainsomnia · 04/07/2021 11:24

But these threads always turn into whataboutery with some kids running up to dogs. Yes but that’s not what we are talking about is it
The reason why I brought it up is because these threads are always one directional. I'm not even sure why new posters bother, they just need to do a search and they will find dozen of similar themed ones in the last month.

I'm tired of reading dog owners being demonised, insuring that most are clueless, unrespectful, selfish, inconsiderate yet the moment one brings up the issue about their children causing similar harm to the dogs, this is understated and almost ridiculed.

It's perfect valid to bring it up here rather than make a separate thread to highlight that everyone has are responsible to ensure that they and the children and animal in their care don't hurt and upset others.

Original poster
PraiseBee · 04/07/2021 11:26

@rantymcrantface66

I do not agree at all with this. You should not push a toddler. If your dog is as small as you say it is scoop it up. It's not the toddlers fault it isn't being helped to avoid the dog or approach carefully

I agree with this too, if my dog is under control I can easily protect it (and the child) from a toddler or child. I see it as my responsibility as a dog owner.

Agree totally
OP posts:
Abhannmor · 04/07/2021 11:29

When our twins were about 6 months old we were enjoying a stroll on a tow path when a young guy came towards us accompanied by a pit bull. We turned the buggy sideways on so it was facing the metal fence by the canal. ' He's alright ' said the man . ' Well yes , but I don't know that ' I replied . This enraged the dog owner. ' You do cos I just told ya' he snapped . You might be able to distract a dog with a treat. But what can you do with its owner?

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 04/07/2021 11:30

Imho there are a lot of poorly trained dogs out there, and the wave of Covid puppies has exacerbated that.

It's such a shame, as occasionally I come across experienced dog owners with well trained animals, and while I'm not a dog lover, I can see that these well trained pets are an asset to their families and zero inconvenience to those around them.

However that's a small fraction of the dogs I come across (living in an area with a lot of dog ownership).

vivainsomnia · 04/07/2021 11:30

I do not agree at all with this. You should not push a toddler. If your dog is as small as you say it is scoop it up. It's not the toddlers fault it isn't being helped to avoid the dog or approach carefully
The double standards are staggering. It's ok to kick a dog but pushing even gently a toddler isn't. My dog welfare means as much to me as your kid does to you. I know hard to comprehend for many but nevertheless a fact.

I never said I would purposely harm the child, but if your toddler came running after my dog with a stick trying to strike my dog, I would do anything to stop them. If that means they fall in the process of me picking up my dog, it would be the irresponsible parent's fault, not mine.

Ijustknowitstimetogo · 04/07/2021 11:31

I don’t know where you’re all meeting these friendly dogs. I’d love it if a friendly dog came up to me to say hello. But they never do.

Dogs don’t seem as friendly as they did years ago.

Jellybabiesforbreakfast · 04/07/2021 11:33

The level of harm that an out-of-control, rogue dog can cause to a small child is usually much greater than the harm to the dog which can be caused by an out-of-control, rogue small child. Dogs move faster, are often bigger and have teeth and claws.

rantymcrantface66 · 04/07/2021 11:33

Of course it's not ok to push a toddler fgs 😆. Is that not assault? It's not double standards as a toddler is unlikely to rip in to your dogs flesh and scar him for life. That's why people might, in certain situations, kick a dog - to prevent themselves or their child from being badly injured or killed.

Jellybabiesforbreakfast · 04/07/2021 11:34

Sorry should say sharp teeth. Most children will have teeth, hopefully Grin.

vivainsomnia · 04/07/2021 11:34

I agree with this too, if my dog is under control I can easily protect it (and the child) from a toddler or child. I see it as my responsibility as a dog owner
My dog is under control when running free, bothering noone in an area where dogs are lowed to do so. I refuse to keep my dog on a lead, right next to me taking away her freedom to run because some stupid and irresponsible parents are letting their toddlers or older kids misbehave or are too busy to pay attention to what they are doing.

What kind of person would blame a dog owner for their own kid trying to hit the dog up with a stick! Only on MM!

rantymcrantface66 · 04/07/2021 11:35

*I don’t know where you’re all meeting these friendly dogs. I’d love it if a friendly dog came up to me to say hello. But they never do.
*
I think it's because most dogs find most adults boring - they run up to other dogs because it's instinct and small children because of the way the move all fast and unpredictable is exciting.

BorderlineHappy · 04/07/2021 11:36

I'm tired of reading dog owners being demonised
@vivainsomnia I'm sure you threatening to push a small child over is doing wonders for their image.

And as a side note,you push my DC over and it's the last thing you do.

rantymcrantface66 · 04/07/2021 11:37

But if your dog is fully under control and the environment is safe enough to be off the lead then just call your dog away. Dogs are faster than children

youshallnotpass9 · 04/07/2021 11:37

Its really bad at the moment

I have a dog aggressive dog and we were coming on so well, he was able to be within a 6ft of a dog, we now can't take him out during the day at all because of the amount of dogs that want to say hello, despite the fuck off lead, the fuck off coat and the fuck off muzzle. I still have the its ok they are friendly, bully for you but my fucking dog wants to rip yours apart that is why we have so many fucking signs on him to tell you not to come near us, you fucking womblecunt

vivainsomnia · 04/07/2021 11:37

It's not double standards as a toddler is unlikely to rip in to your dogs flesh and scar him for life
Your kid is much more likely to do damage to my dog then my small dog is to your kid.

But it would be ok to kick my dog if she ever got a bit close to your child, but not ok for me to gently push your kid away from my dog if they tried to hurt it.

Not all dogs are aggressive and dangerous. Not all kid are gentle and harmless.

Cherrysoup · 04/07/2021 11:38

@burritofan no, you won’t, because most owners on here seem to be responsible.

My two have been taught not to run at people, it’s scary, even tho they’re a known ‘soppy’ breed. I don’t want them scaring anyone or being kicked.

There is definitely an increase of lockdown puppy owners who don’t seem to have a clue. I have to avoid a particular place now, previously a favourite, because there’s a group of new owners who have all acquired puppies and don’t train them, they just let them run round like feral creatures. So frustrating.

vivainsomnia · 04/07/2021 11:39

But if your dog is fully under control and the environment is safe enough to be off the lead then just call your dog away
No because my dog will scared stiff and just freeze. You know, as some kids do too when they are scared?

Incredible the length some people will go to accuse others of being irresponsible whilst desperately defending their right to be.

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