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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

'Don't worry, he's friendly'

467 replies

PraiseBee · 04/07/2021 07:50

Too flippin friendly. Yet again, another dog running up to my four year old DC with a chunk of a branch in its mouth, firmly ignoring it's owners recall whilst they yell at me 'don't worry, Fluffyballs is friendly'. My DC loves dogs but hates dogs rushing up to him and is obviously scared. Large dogs are the same height as him and can easily knock him over. Imagine as an adult being rushed up to by a horse with a bit of tree trunk in its mouth trying to lick your face. I think most adults would be perturbed by this. It seems to be happening more often. Are dogs getting less well trained? I think the thing that makes my blood boil over is that the dog owners seem to think their dog is the most amazing thing ever so of course me and my DC want to bowled over by Fluffyballs. No we really don't and no, I give a shit what your dog is called. AIBU to be so annoyed by this happening every time we go to a children's park?!

OP posts:
Sloaneslone · 05/07/2021 17:22

@Flaxmeadow

Otherwise why aren't dog owners routinely riddled with illness?

Maybe many are but love fur baby so much that they are willing to overlook it.

Im sure some dog owners are responsible and take measures to protect others, but increasingly there are bonkers people out there that for exmaple, when a dog kills a child, they actually want the dog/or dogs, to be saved and rehabilitated. You see this madness in social media news post comments. At one time it would have been totally unacceptable to even say it in private, never mind say it in public but they actually feel sorry for the dog. This is the insanity of where we're at now, it's becoming like a cult of dog worship for some, as if a dog has the same rights as humans, and it's dangerous.

People feel for the dog, because the dog is going to die, because of the owners.

In every case where a dog has killed a child there are multiple failures on the part of the dog owner and/or parents . Chances are, if the dog had, had a different owner it wouldn't have killed a child or be facing death itself.

Its really not hard to have compassion for animal, that's been killed for doing what it has been trained to do.

You can hate and be horrified by what an animal has done. But also have compassion for the dog.

I would love to know when it's been unacceptable to say that. Because its not my living memory and my mum is in her 60s and feels the same. And my grandfather would say the same before he died at 90.

Having no compassion for animals, is not a positive character trait.

Dog owners are no more routinely ill than dog owners, it's a ridiculous thing to say.

You may think there's a cult of dog lovers. But there also seems to a rise in the anti dog cult who are convinced dogs will be the end of humanity.

EineReiseDurchDieZeit · 05/07/2021 17:22

I am very late to this party but its my number one pet peeve and it makes me absolutely murderous, and nearly every dog owner does it. He is your dog not mine, off you fuck, utterly selfish.

Sloaneslone · 05/07/2021 17:25

I wonder if some areas are worse than others. And if so, why that is. I would say this happens to me once a year. Maybe twice.

My dogs don't do it, ever. And we rarely get an uncontrolled dog approaching us.

But, its happening to alot of people on a regular basis and it's really not ok.

LST · 05/07/2021 17:26

@lucie82

My daughter will run into traffic to avoid dogs, she's terrified of them, so it doesn't matter how friendly the dog is, keep it on a lead please
A dog does not need to be on a lead to be under control. My dog is allowed off lead where he is allowed to be.
waitingpatientlyforspring · 05/07/2021 17:27

My 13 is so scared of dogs, it spoils so many days out.

On top of the lack of control (which is what he is scared of most), telling a child not to worry, the dog is friendly also tells a child that not all dogs are friendly and they are right to be scared of them.

AuroraSophia · 05/07/2021 17:28

I have a dog and a 4 year old and massively agree. My son is still weary of big dogs that come bounding up to him and he’s use to dogs!! But like you say it’s like a horse stampeding towards an adult!! I have specifically trained my dog to avoid children and adults as you never know who may be cautious.
It seems to be older dog owners who don’t have young children that seem to assume everyone loves their dog like they do.
Absolutely dog lover here but yeah there definitely seems to be an issue!

BackBoiler · 05/07/2021 17:30

When my 9yo was around 1yo a labrador on a long lead hovered over him in his pushchair. He is finally not scared of dogs anymore!

Supergirl1958 · 05/07/2021 17:32

Sorry but yabu. Dogs can’t tell wether dc are scared of them or not.

LST · 05/07/2021 17:33

@Supergirl1958

Sorry but yabu. Dogs can’t tell wether dc are scared of them or not.
Dogs should never get close enough to a child it doesn't know for that to bloody matter!?
PopcornAndWine · 05/07/2021 17:45

@Supergirl1958

Sorry but yabu. Dogs can’t tell wether dc are scared of them or not.
Hmm

There's always one!

Twizbe · 05/07/2021 17:52

@Supergirl1958

Sorry but yabu. Dogs can’t tell wether dc are scared of them or not.
Dogs shouldn't get close enough to an unfamiliar child to find out.

My SiL's dog knocked over my 2 year old the other day. She landed on a hard floor. SiL's response? Oh that's what dogs do!!!

Daineseturbo · 05/07/2021 17:52

Dog owners are too often oblivious - my girls are not keen on dogs, and they actively move away when they see a big-ish one. But then the dogs bound up to them anyway. So, dog owners, keep them on a lead. Lazy fuckers.

nocturnalcatfreetogoodhome · 05/07/2021 17:53

I adore dogs - I detest dog owners.

We have one on our local park 'Tilly'. Tilly is completely out of control and her Mum is an arsehole, constantly on her phone completely oblivious to what her little darling is doing.

Tilly went for our 13 year old girl as she went on her twilight constitutional. Our dog gave her a warning bark but when Tilly wouldn't fuck off, she pinned her to the floor (not biting) as Tilly writhed barked and frothed furiously. Tilly's Mum suddenly starts screaming and sprinting from opposite side of the park absolutely hysterical, Tilly was still trying to get at our dog as she was carried away.

Fucking madness these owners.

eeyore228 · 05/07/2021 17:56

I took my 2yr DD to the park, despite the fact dogs were supposed to be on leads in that area a dog had been let off. They were very excitable and large and ran at DD, knocked her down and started licking her face. She was screaming and trying to get up. I pulled the dog away but the damage was done. The owner wasn't bothered. DD is now 9, it has taken many year's to get her to a stage where she doesn't have a complete meltdown when a dog walks by. I know that lots of. dogs are excitable but owners need to try as best they can to at least adhere to basic rules. We had gone somewhere dogs were required to be on a less and it was ignored. It's a real.shame.

Chuck2015 · 05/07/2021 18:02

I have a rescue dog and a 6 year and I hear you on both counts. Something has gone really wrong in the world of basic dog etiquette. When I grew up in 70's/80's people just kept their dogs under control in a public place and an on lead dog meant keep yours away. Only yesterday I had a Labrador owner yell at me because I didn't want her dog running up to mine (bearing in mind he was 3 times bigger than mine and mine is injured) Her attitude was entitled, smug and frankly based on shaming me for not wanting her precious dog to run up. I am lucky that my daughter is tall for her age and very confident among dogs but that's not the point, she's been nipped out of the blue several times for doing nothing, and with kids and animals I'm always one for preventative rather than reactive action. For the record by law an out of control dog (even if 'friendly') in a public place is illegal so you could remind them of that next time, take down their entitlement!

CineworldYorN · 05/07/2021 18:03

I agree, my daughter is allergic to dogs and I have to carry an epipen, it's really irresponsible of the owners. No matter how friendly a dog is, if one licks my daughter she can go in anaphylaxis.

Kteeb1 · 05/07/2021 18:04

What's just as annoying as a dog owner is the amount of people who come straight up to your dog who is on a lead and doesn't ask if they can pet them first. Adults and children do this all the time and the amount of people who get offended when I say no she's nervous is ridiculous. I have a lead for her that says please don't approach but it's hard to see. She won't wear the coat. No adult or child should approach a strange dog without checking with the owner first.

Jellybabiesforbreakfast · 05/07/2021 18:06

Dogs can't tell wether dc are scared of them or not

In which case the sensible thing to do is to err on the side of caution and keep your dog away from unfamiliar children. Just like most sensible parents keep their children away from unfamiliar dogs.

Mumloveswine · 05/07/2021 18:06

This happened to me the other day too in the park! Thought I was loosing my mind. A dog ran at my 8 year old and was jumping up trying to play. She had a dress on so kept being scratched. The dog owners just watched and smiled! I said “your dog is playing but it’s scratching my daughter” they just watched. So I walked away and the owners called their dog away. Next thing it’s bolting at my daughter where I ran to place myself between the dog and my daughter and pretty much booted it. They still did nothing! I was fuming!! It may not have been attacking my daughter but was harming her.
Next time I’ll go scratch them playfully and see how they like it. Rude.

TheJade · 05/07/2021 18:08

I voted yabu but by accident! 🤣

You are not being unreasonable- I hate it too x

Sloaneslone · 05/07/2021 18:11

@Supergirl1958

Sorry but yabu. Dogs can’t tell wether dc are scared of them or not.
That's such a poor attitude. Dogs shouldn't be approaching people uninvited and should always return to their owners when called.

If your dog only comes back sometimes, it's not under control.

mynameisbrian · 05/07/2021 18:12

Kteeb1 this thread is about dogs with no recall and shit owners. Start your own thread about kids as your comment is irrelevant

Ouch44 · 05/07/2021 18:14

Am a dog owner and constantly pissed off by this too. It has definitely got worse since my last dog died 5 years ago and now we have a puppy.
My dog never goes off her lead as she is mental and is anxious (she just behaves like an idiot nothing terrible). I'm trying to teach her to be calm on walks but pretty much every single time we go to the park an off lead dog is allowed to approach her. 2 did today and she ended up a jittery mess.
My last dog was lovely but was pretty big and loved kids as ours were small at the time so could be over enthusiastic if she saw one in the park in which case we always put her on her lead.

BoredZelda · 05/07/2021 18:19

Definitely not ok to think it's ok, but hands up I am partly guilty of doing this.

No, you are FULLY responsible for doing this.

Keep your dog on a lead whenever there are others around and won’t become a problem for other people.

user1472151176 · 05/07/2021 18:22

Yup. Completely agree. Same problem here. My kids are scared of dogs because of dogs running at them and jumping on them. I love dogs and grew up with dogs but this annoys me so much.

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