Just a bit of background...I’m an expat living abroad in Asia. Met my DP out here and we’ve been together now for just over two years. I’m mid 20s and he’s mid 30s if that’s relevant. We have been offered teaching jobs in a very lucrative international school. It’s one of those international schools where you’re pretty much in a compound and do everything on site.
The only thing that is making me doubt my decision is the fact that my DP’s best friend and his new girlfriend (they’ve been dating for under 1 year) have also been offered jobs at the same school. DP and his best friend have known each other for many years and they are almost like brothers. DP’s best friend and I had developed a good friendship until he met his current GF out here. I personally think she is extremely controlling. For example, she will give me really dirty looks every time I speak to her boyfriend. She often starts scrolling down her phone every time I speak in a group setting. I have asked her “ how are you” and I’ll get a one worded answer. He has also changed since meeting her and I often feel is he is listening to her opinions about me. As a result, I hardly see them anymore as I decided to keep a distance. She is a native of the country we live in. I understand that cultures can be different, but this is just plain rude behaviour. None of her behaviour has been called out on because she’s still new to the group.
How do I work with these people? We will be in different departments but I will see them on a social level far more regularly. I’m sick of putting on a front and pretending this behaviour doesn’t bother me.
My DP thinks I should just ignore it, be the bigger person and her true colours might show eventually in the new school. He thinks that either of us confronting them will just cause added issues and it is best to just ignore her behaviour.
I have thought about confronting them but this is going to make things so awkward in the new school. I’m not sure if maybe I should just ask DP best friend if I have done something to upset her? But then this has been going on since September and he might just say why didn’t you say anything before and turn it on me? Expats often live in a bubble and I just don’t want to cause an awkward drama.
How would you deal this? I feel really lost and it’s starting to affect my mental health. I’m really not sure whether to even take this job because I am dreading seeing these people every day.
Thanks for reading. Sorry it is so long!!