To think this is more than anxiety?

[oneheckofayear]

I literally can't talk to anyone I don't know and feel comfortable with without becoming acutely aware of every feeling/twitch/pain in my body, feeling as if I'm about to collapse, sweating, my mind going blank, my eyes watering, hearing ringing in my ears and my body shaking.

I've been that way for about 4 years now, and it's really exhausting. Today I went in to a car dealership to see about buying a car and the salesman took me into his office, I was fine before going into the office just standing talking, it seems to not be as bad when I am busy, for instance, walking or even standing where I can move about. Anyway in his office, there was literally nothing to be worried about, I wasn't making the purchase there and then or committing to anything, the guy was friendly but I felt awful. I became acutely aware of a pain in the top of my head that I hadn't noticed until then and I was sure I was going to have an aneurysm. I kept rushing him along so I could get out of there.

I get this loads, for instance with uni lectures, doctors, anywhere I need to sit down face to face and talk. Weirdly in interview settings I do better as I feel I am hyper focused.

It's actually ruining my life to be honest and I have been to the doctors for anxiety, they gave me beta blockers which does help with presentations etc but I can't pop them all day every day and that's when I am getting these symptoms.

I don't feel like these are normal anxiety symptoms either, it's sometimes like an out of body experience. Even when I feel completely calm it still happens to me, no matter how much self reassurance I give myself.

I'm going into a career which requires lots of one on one meetings and needs me to be quite social which I was up until 4 years ago. I don't know what happened or what's causing it but it's becoming quite debilitating and I feel like I can't talk to my mum or family about it as she will really worry.

Does this sound like more than anxiety? I can't take beta blockers, I am already overweight and on anti depressants and I've heard beta blockers cause weight gain.

It sounds like a panic disorder.

I just dont know how to get a handle on it. There's literally nothing to panic about, I deal with and have dealt with much more stressful situations in life yet I can't handle a sit down with someone. I went out to lunch with my friend the other day and it happened again and afterwards I realised it was because I didn't feel very comfortable with her, she wasn't making much conversation so I felt it was all on me. However, still no reason to 'panic'. I live in dread of it next happening.

It really is quite a common disorder.

People talk a lot about thoughts leading to feelings because CBT is so popular.

But often there are no thoughts leading to feelings of panic. The panic just comes on.

There are things you can do for it - ssri and similar medication, grounding exercises, therapy. You can have diazepam for a couple of weeks to get a break from it if it gets really extreme.

You can get better from it. I used to have it for the first half of every day but haven’t had an incident of it in six months following grounding techniques and counselling.

You might want to consider a panic issue caused by hormonal imbalance. Being overweight makes that even more of a possibility.

@LibertyMole yes I think that is where my frustration comes from, it doesn't seem to be caused by any thoughts or any real worries, seems to just pop up out of nowhere. Thank you for all your suggestions, I will have a look into them all! I'm glad your feeling better with your panic disorder!

@Aquamarine1029 I do have PCOS and type 2 diabetes. I never actually considered that could be a contributing factor. Could it? I am on 2000 mg of metformin and start the 'skinny jabs' in November (sorry to call it that but I'm not sure what the medication is called exactly).

I probably don’t think of it as being a panic disorder, but as being really extreme anxiety, but if you describe it as anxiety people assume you mean worrying all the time.

I would see it as similar to if you were standing on the tracks and the train was rushing towards you. You don’t spend ages worrying about all the eventualities; you just experience immediate terror.

Counselling can explore why you are reacting with terror to a car showroom, without making the assumption that you spend a lot of time ruminating on things.

Yes, definitely look at hormones! I didn’t know about the weight issue and will look into that too for future wellbeing.

Get your iron levels checked too. I have similar when I'm very anemic. It causes physical symptoms that are similar to anxiety attacks.

I do have PCOS and type 2 diabetes. I never actually considered that could be a contributing factor. Could it?

It absolutely could be, and it's a shame none of your doctors ever mentioned this to you. Just Google 'obesity and anxiety disorders' and you will have more than you can handle to read about. Obesity wreaks havoc on your hormone levels, and just like in peri-menopause, it can lead to horrible issues with anxiety and panic disorders.

www.nhs.uk/conditions/iron-deficiency-anaemia/

Take a look at the less common symptoms - headaches (which for me are really intense and painful), tinnitus (ears ringing) - I'm also much more anxious in general when my level is low.

That out of body experience is depersonalisation. It’s all part of anxiety.