Parents with Rhumatoid/Psoriotic Arthritis.. do you worry about passing it to your kids?

[Mumincloud]

My H has PA.. P since 8yrs and PA since 32... he is now 44 and has ups and downs. Downs are happeneing more than ups thou.

I have 2 kids and I suspect I have anxiety but I worry about them getting it ( Like Juvinile version) ALL THE TIME 😥.

My daughter (now 7) had a sprain 5 months ago on the trampoline and her knee got swollen and pain. The first thing in my mind is JIA. It git better in a week with rubbing Voltaren and elivation. Now the pain is back after 5 months in the same knee and was there was 4 days and now gone ( on its own). I again dread its JIA. I literally shiver :(. I am so sorry to be this drama queen even when nothing is diagnosed but the fear of kids getting diagnosed is consuming me :(. Last week she had hayfever eyes and the firat thought is Uveitis that has come from undiagnosed JIA :(.

Parents with these conditions that can be passed on... please put some sense into me.. I am sure not everyone is as negative as me:(.

We have asked for an xray and bloods... I am writing with misty eyes as I fear she will have something showing in her bloods...

I dont know what to do and how to not fear constantly about it. I am hopeless in mindful ness.

I have RA and I do worry about my DC. I just keep a close eye on them. Hope your DD is ok, I think it’s natural to worry about something like this.

Yes I do but there is nothing we can do.

Never heard of PA before we had DC, one of them developed P at the age of 2 so you can imagine how I felt when he developed PA.

It sounds like your anxiety is extreme and perhaps you need to help to deal with that?

I've made the personal decision not to have children, mostly due to my own health rather than any increased of inheritance. Although I have thought about it. I'm concerned if I have children I may have a flare up and not be able to care for them, especially if I end up a single parent (I have limited support network). Having a family member with R.A increases the risk of developing it but the inheritance risk is still low. The disease is more than genetics, there are environmental factors too.

Have you spoken to a health professional about any of your concerns and questions? It's not healthy to be in constant fear of it and you could pass your health fears onto your children. I found it reassuring to learn about my disease.

Thank you for easing me.

@RandomMess and @firealarmhell... yes I think I am due some anxiety therapy.. its such hell being in constant anxiety and linking even common cold to RA/PA :(. Someone adviced me to read 'The Secret' few months ago ( the book I was nit keen on actually).. but the idea it gives that 'what you think will happen' has sent me spiral into the anxiety. For me; it was faaaar from self help and adversely affected my anxiety.

Anyway thanks again all :)

I have two genetic mutations related to my pancreas and I've had serious issues in my life and my son was tested two and half years ago and he carries one of them-talk about guilt city! I feel awful but I can't do anything about it just monitor and try to modify the factors that I can. Best of luck

I have RA but only developed after my first child was born (and I then developed celiac after my second - I will not be having any more children!!). I do feel guilty that I may pass things on but there's nothing you can do about it. You will at least know what to look for so it's likely to be diagnosed promptly. Try to be kind to yourself.

what you think will happen

Yeah, that's magical thinking bullshit. Your DH/his parents didn't think him into PsA, did he? Because that would make it his/their fault for not thinking positively enough when he was a child, which is clearly bollocks. He no more thought himself into immune system dysfunction that a person with cancer can think themselves into remission or a parent of a child with Down's Syndrome can think them into not having a trisomy.

If, worst case scenario, either of your DC do turn out at some point to have something autoimmune, the treatments available now and the treatment protocols are completely different to when your DH was diagnosed - with greater success when started early. And any issues are less likely to be written off as growing pains for years before diagnosis/any damage is done. Which means their experiences will not be the same as his.

One of mine did. She got treated early and is well looked after my her Rheumatology Team because I knew the signs and could ask the right questions. One of mine didn't. But she inherited something from her apparently completely healthy father instead. Neither of DP's children have anything at all.

What I would say is that your DH might benefit from a review if what treatment he has now isn't working - I went through tons of things before hitting on the right biologic and, along with support from Podiatry, physio, exercise, occasional steroid pulses and a load of potions from the GP, I'm better now than I have been for years. DP (yep, I somehow managed to meet somebody who had Psoriasis before I had any obvious skin involvement, as I got the PsA first - he was the one who suggested I went to the GP and showed them what my skin was doing, which then led to the PsA diagnosis and the right treatment for both).

In short, it's not going to happen because you're worried about it, if it does happen, their experience is going to be different because it's another 20+ years on in developments in medical science and there's a very good chance that you're worrying about something they don't and won't have in any case.

@EKGEMS thankyou for your reply, this is why I came here, to get help in thinking straight
@Redstorm2807... figers tightly crossed both of us!
@NeverDropYourMoonCup... Thankyou for your kind and assuring post

My dad has horrendous RA, I worry about it passing down to me, or worse skipping a generation and my children having it. Worry won’t change it, but you can’t always stop the worry.

I was diagnosed with RA when DS was 5 months old. DM has it too. I worry a bit about DS having it but there’s nothing I can do, and I don’t blame DM for potentially passing it on either. It’s just one of those things.

I would say it’s stopped me having more children, because my health isn’t good enough to have another child.

I had JIA as a child and RA now as an adult. I don’t really have any advice except that if one of your children develops RA, they will be fine OP. I’ve had it almost all my life (over 30 years) and due to the incredible medication available these days I live a perfectly normal life, exercise, chase after my kids, and generally feel normal. RA has given me so much - resilience, strength, compassion - it’s not a hoot when it flares up obviously but I haven’t had a flare in ages.

It’s not a life sentence and it’s perfectly possible to live a full, happy, “normal” life with RA. Good luck to you all x

@Freddiefox... sigh.. just hoping for the best!
@Twilightstarbright.. it does affect your decissions dosnt it?.. only fair...

@Elletine.. your post is refreshing!.. some one who had Jia and then posting a positive story in adulthood has given me a much needed releif.
Thankyou for the wishes and thankyou for your post

I have RA and definitely do worry about passing it to my children. However, after over 20 years of treatment I feel that if either of my children did develop it I would have a good understanding of all the treatments available to them.
Treatment for RA is really good now.

I have PsA. No-one else in my extended family has PsA or even psoriasis, I'm literally the only one so no family link in my case. I think an individual's risk raises slightly if a close relative has the condition but is still low - it's very likely none of your DC will ever develop P or PsA.

Lots of people inherit conditions from a parent so if it does happen, don't beat yourselves up. I inherited EB Simplex from my Dad, and he from his mother. I don't resent him - it's just one of those things. It's a dominant gene so there's a 50% chance of each DC I have inheriting it. Dad and I manage well and treatment has come on loads - I even have anti blistering bandages for hot weather which weren't around when my Dad and Grandmother were young. I know if I do pass it on that my DC will be fine.

I agree with PP that in the unlikely event that one of your DC did develop JIA/PsA etc. there are so many excellent treatments out there now that can take effect before any damage is done. It may help to speak to your husband's Rheumy about your worries? Be kind to yourself.

I have PsA - new diagnosis and after having children. In fact, I suspect the trauma of birth was a trigger for the psoriasis. Do I worry? Sometimes, especially as one has eczema. But the odds of passing it on are low, and medical advances are moving along so fast that, if they do get it, their experience will be very different to mine. I refuse to feel too much worry or guilt over something that might not happen.

I have psoriatic and ra as well as psoriasis. It never entered my head that they could be passed down.
My kids are adults and have got worse which was passed from their father. ( He was not aware he had it until onr child was diagnosed)

Better to be born but have iffy genes than not have any genes at all.

I also only got RA following pregnancy. I don't especially worry about my DS having the same as he won't ever be pregnant....
I do realise that I may well have passed on some kind of predisposition to autoimmune problems, but I am hoping that being male will shield him to some extent as they are more common in women. The main risk to him for a triggering event would probably be some kind of post-viral fatigue syndrome....that didn't really bother me before 2020.

I have RA, as do many in my family, but as for passing it on to my children, I don't worry about things I can't control.

I had psoriasis for years, as did my dad and his dad, and I had no idea of the existence of PsA, it was always just a fairly mild skin annoyance to me (and it went away totally in pregnancy which was great). But about a year after I had my baby, PsA developed. It got very bad very quickly which was fortunate in a way as it was quickly identified and I got on biologics straight away, and a couple of years later it's gone into remission and my life is pretty much normal.

I do feel guilt that I may have passed this onto my son and thought psoriasis was no big deal, and I'm now hypervigilant if I spot anything odd on his skin, but when I realize how many advances have been made in recent years, the chances are if he does ever develop PsA it'll be very treatable and I'm sure we'll catch it early on. I daresay if I wasn't living in the era of biologics I may have a different opinion, but right now I'm at peace with the thought that no one has a perfect set of genes

I have severe P and PsA. My mum has RA. I do worry about them getting it. My whole family have P though and all developed it at the age of 19 with the stress of leaving home. Although I don't want them to get it at all, I want them to be warned as I wasn't so I had a horrible time until I got embarrassed enough to mention it to someone. Ten years later it is well managed and okay during pregnancy. I'm not looking forward to the flare after birth though. Hopefully they won't get it. My DH's side all have dyslexia and poor vision so there are other things I don't want them to inherit either - just crossing our fingers but at least we can be prepared and support them like we weren't.

Hi All,
Thankyou so much!.. I am so glad I posted my worry here:).
@Georgieporgie29 and @MrsPepperpot79 and @NailedIt1 true, the treatment part is one thing positive about it!
@EpidermolysisBullosa.. your approach is very mature and composed unlike mine
@Cryalot2.. oh!.. sorry for being naive but how did they know that fact ,when your DH himself wasnt aware?
@Saz12..agree but sometimes iffy gene is too naughty and you wish it wont show up
@BestZebbie.. 2020 is an eye opener isnt it, nit just in one way
@Aquamarine1029.. I wish I was like you!
@Dany165.. some genes are just more pain than others. I am a short person, while other people would want their children to be tall, I am ok with my kids being short, like you ,I am crossing fingers on the health determining genes.🥂