I'm feeling terrible for only just piecing this together now but hear me out.
My DS has always been what you would call shy, I was the same as a child so I think I've seen the way he is and just assumed he was like me and will improve as an adult. He's always chatted away to me normally and often excessively when he was younger.
At primary school his reports have always come back saying he is very quiet and participates much better on a 1-2-1 than a group etc but there have never been any issues at school because of this. He would come home from school and speak to me non stop all evening.
I suppose for the last 2 years I've noticed he has been alot quieter, put that down to being a teenager/hormones etc but a few things have made me think there might be something more.
My DS never speaks to my current partner, not at all and when my DP is in the room my DS won't speak, he wont answer me if I ask a question and if its something I need an answer on he will nod or shrug his shoulders. He doesnt speak at family functions, will whisper a reply if someone is asking a direct question but that is it and he always looks uncomfortable and awkward when being spoken to.
There was an issue at school the other week where my DS was hurt and the teacher called me to say he wouldn't answer her questions and was being very quiet so she couldn't judge if he was seriously hurt or not.
My DP gets annoyed when my ds won't answer me and says he is being rude but aibu to think there could be more to this?
He speaks to a group of friends on facetime/headset everyday to the point where I have to ask him to be quiet as they'll be chatting late into the night on weekends so he's more than capable of speaking.
I've looked into selective mutism and some of the symptoms match up but I dont know if I'm barking up the wrong tree.
Is he just a shy teenager?