Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be ridiculously tearful after a holiday?

102 replies

IHTC · 23/06/2021 11:54

We were away last week and returned on Saturday just gone. I have felt so so sad since we've been back, I could burst into tears and have to distract myself to prevent it actually happening.

Everytime we have a holiday I end up going through this for weeks and I wonder if for some people, a holiday just isn't healthy? I get so caught up in all the fun and love being around all of my family. Then we get back, reality hits and I feel so low.

Is this a thing that nobody talks about? Or am I just being ridiculous as let's be honest, we're very lucky to have had a holiday in the first place!

OP posts:
LunaLula83 · 23/06/2021 14:38

You muppet!

notanothertakeaway · 23/06/2021 14:40

I get so caught up in all the fun and love being around all of my family

I suggest you try to find ways to have fun and love at home, not just living for the holidays

NarcissaMalfoysManicure · 23/06/2021 14:41

@LunaLula83

You muppet!
A little rude, no?
ThanksIGotItInMorrisons · 23/06/2021 14:44

I get the post holiday blues too. Sometimes I think I could cry. But it does pass.

Lolamambam · 23/06/2021 14:45

Poor you, I understand. I had this 2 years ago when I came home from a 3 week jolly round various parts of America. Had such a great time. Came home and felt so low I ended up being signed off. Crazy, but I get it. I did hate my job going back made me so anxious after my lovely, fun filled holiday. Lots of love xx

Lolamambam · 23/06/2021 14:46

@LunaLula83

You muppet!
OP, ignore this dickhead
Cam2020 · 23/06/2021 14:49

I get this! Even though I do want to come home really and I like my life. I think it's partly a type of stress reaction. We spend ages looking forward to and preparing for our holiday, then when we come back, there's shopping and washing to be done, hundreds of work emails. Although enhoyable and totally worth it, I actually think it's quite a sfressful process.

museumum · 23/06/2021 14:51

Being a bit sad at the end is the sign of a good holiday, but feeling tearful for weeks is not right. Are you isolated at home during the week (you say you're on mat leave)? Do you spend too much time alone? Or do you not see enough of your husband? You should think about ways to feel more happy at home.

earthyfire · 23/06/2021 14:52

Hmm never had this really, I'm usually ready to get back home by the end of my holiday. I do usually start looking for my next holiday once I am back but don't always book anything, just nice to look. Grin

jsp5642 · 23/06/2021 14:54

I always notice that our house is a mess when I get home. Holiday houses are always so much tidier because they have no clutter in them and have professional cleaners.

It definitely makes a difference if we go away to a nice house though. Once we went to a really cramped dark house that was full of huge ornaments and I was really glad to come home that time.

I'm not sure if I am sad to come home, but the mess really is a bit of a let-down. I don't notice it at all at other times of the year.

hamsterchump · 23/06/2021 14:56

This is why I love living in Cornwall, I see people enjoying their holidays and it reminds me how lucky I am to live here all the time. We walked some of the South West Coast Path yesterday and found a beautiful, empty beach to swim at and I was thinking how great it is to be able to have an amazing day out for free (well we did buy 3 ciders for £5) in basically paradise. Of course there are downsides, lack of amenities and choice of some kinds of entertainment, poor transport links and crowded places in the season but none of that would make me move away. Maybe you should consider moving OP.

SpeakingFranglais · 23/06/2021 15:16

@DinosaurDiana

No, I’m always glad to get home to my bed and my things.
Me too Grin

Nothing better than getting in, unpacking straight away, putting the cases in the loft, bunging a load of washing in and ordering a takeaway!

dorothygaleandtoto · 23/06/2021 15:16

I don't really feel overwhelmingly sad when I return from a holiday, just grateful for the memories. We've had to cancel our last 4 holidays due to deaths and ill health in the extended family, and I did feel guilty at the time for grieving for the lost holiday as well as the lost / fading family member.

ancientgran · 23/06/2021 15:17

I once had a 4 week holiday abroad. It was lovely, I missed a miserable March in England and had 4 really pleasant weeks in a warm country and it was a great time to go for me as high summer would have been too hot for me.

I felt suicidal for months afterwards. Never been so depressed in my life and I sword I would never, ever, ever go away for longer than 2 weeks and ideally only for a week. The misery wasn't worth it.

I feel for you.

ancientgran · 23/06/2021 15:18

I swore, no need for a sword.

ancientgran · 23/06/2021 15:19

@hamsterchump

This is why I love living in Cornwall, I see people enjoying their holidays and it reminds me how lucky I am to live here all the time. We walked some of the South West Coast Path yesterday and found a beautiful, empty beach to swim at and I was thinking how great it is to be able to have an amazing day out for free (well we did buy 3 ciders for £5) in basically paradise. Of course there are downsides, lack of amenities and choice of some kinds of entertainment, poor transport links and crowded places in the season but none of that would make me move away. Maybe you should consider moving OP.
I live in South Devon, I go to big cities for my holidays as I miss the things they have to offer. Trying really hard to get DH to move.
OrangeBlossomMacaron · 23/06/2021 15:24

@FrownedUpon

I used to get this when returning home to London as everything seemed so grey, dirty and busy compared to the holiday. However, now I’ve moved to lovely countryside I don’t get this feeling anymore as I love where I live.
Same with me. Returning to somewhere as urban as London when I lived there really heightened the dichotomy between my holiday destination and the greyness of London (despite still loving some parts of the city). Now I look forward to coming home to the countryside where it's just as peaceful, bucolic, and relaxing.. its made a world of difference to the 'holiday blues'.
Puttheneedleontheraquet · 23/06/2021 15:33

As a previous poster said, I always used to have this, so moved abroad! I love and miss England and love to visit, but often felt depressed there. Haven’t felt in all these years living in other countries

Itgetsthehoseagain · 23/06/2021 15:33

I like coming home. I find holidays stressful - I think it's knowing the cost and so trying to ensure that everything is perfect in order to justify the cost. If anyone is remotely distant personality-wise during a holiday, I enter a fury of overthinking and start planning divorces, career-changes and house-sales. I am, to all intents and purposes, a vile person when on holiday, and I wouldn't wish myself on my worst enemy.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 23/06/2021 15:48

I often get the post holiday blues but it’s often on the night before I leave, rather than after we get back.

Northernlass99 · 23/06/2021 15:48

Post holiday blues. I get this. Always have some nice things in the fridge for when you get home and plan some nice things to do in the following weeks.

NellWilsonsWhiteHair · 23/06/2021 15:59

I've had this a handful of times -

  • once post-Disney, partly because with a small child it was kind of magical to see his wonder (and because the Disney machine is built around enabling the adults to suspend adulthood and join in that wonder, too, so coming back to life and responsibilities felt a bit keener than usual!) and probably partly because it's a knackering holiday so I would have been tired-tearful! I was glad to get home really.
  • once after a holiday with slightly-extended family (me, my kids, plus my mother). Again it was a really pleasant easy holiday and it was also when my relationship with my mother had been steadily and significantly improving and whilst really I am glad to not live with her it was SO nice spending all that week together.
  • and increasingly when returning home from somewhere we visited often and i grew to like better than home (Bournemouth, as it happens!) which is definitely about wanting to relocate, and I hope to do so.

In general i tend to feel sorry that a lovely holiday is over but also looking forward to getting home, as others have said - all my own comforts, peace and quiet in the evenings etc.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 23/06/2021 16:07

Always have some nice things in the fridge for when you get home and plan some nice things to do in the following weeks

I like this suggestion! There’s always that nagging voice telling you that you need to be really austere in the time immediately after a holiday, but even if you don’t have a huge budget you can do nice inexpensive things.

MsTSwift · 23/06/2021 16:11

I actually cried as we drove away from an Italian beach resort last summer. I was right to though this year will be a shit holiday in comparison. My life at home is good but not as good as lolling about sunbathing all day and drinking cocktails.

BiddyPop · 23/06/2021 16:12

I was very very wobbly yesterday.

Boss was in tears (not at me - when we were just finished dealing with something on my side, I asked if all was ok due to something else and it flooded out - senior management bullying on top of too much to do).

Dh was upset as a very good friend and colleague got fired - unexpectedly but negotiated a good deal, but on top of someone else close last year...he was off balance by it.

Dd issues rearing their head again (teen, SNs, COVID restrictions and general teen sh*t).

Extended family gripes on about 5/6 different fronts (illness, isolation, bullying, pressure to visit despite other commitments, expectations to fall in with other plans, ...actually, lots more than 5/6 when I think about it, on both sides).

My own work is also too much to do and serious pressure.

Menopause, lack of sleep, brain fog, etc.

Cub camp this weekend and organising that (as a Leader).

My car NCT (equivalent to MOT) this weekend also.

And I actually got to a point where I closed the pc and drank wine ignoring the world last night. Back on a relatively even-keel today after a reasonable sleep and lots of coffee.