Wanting the impossible...

[FairyAtTheBottomOfTheGarden]

Having been in 2 long relationships in the last 30 years, one which ended with him having an affair and one which just fizzled out to friendship, I'm happily single for the time being.
But I know that at some point, probably when the cold winter nights start drawing in, I'll be thinking it would be nice to be in a loving relationship with someone who wants to wrap their arms around me and treats me right.
I can't be bothered with the dating game though, I just want to find 'the one' without having my heart broken and getting my hopes dashed when things don't work out. I'm hoping to meet someone just by being out and about rather than online dating, I'm too old and cynical for that game.
So AIBU to decide that I want to either be single or be with Mr Right and not bother with anything in between? I know I can't have that, but it would be so nice if I could!

YANBU. Just going through a divorce and I want the same as you. I wonder whether I'm being realistic. My STBXH is a good 'un in many many ways but the constant broken promises and relying on me to do the wirework for most of our marriage (he improved considerably the last few years but I'd stopped loving him by then) broke me. Now I'm wondering whether I'm actually expecting perfection or whether any flaw in a partner will become so irritating to me in the long run that I will start hating them too. In other words maybe it's me and not them. I have (too) many requirements and it's not easy to meet anyone atm. Plus I'm over 40. Things seemed easier in my 20s. I hope I'll have sex again one day with someone I love and who loves me but I just don't know if it'll happen.

Sorry no advice and maybe I sound a bit gloomy - I might think differently in a few years time

*wifework, I'm not an electrician lol

Of course yanbu.

It should be the absolute norm that you're either with mr/Mrs right or single.

OK, so we've established I'm NBU, that's a relief

Next question - how on earth do I go about finding Mr Right?! I'll let you know if I ever find out

Well there's no such thing as 'the one' or 'Mr right'. Just people that are varying degrees of a good fit. You are very disparaging about dating sites but I met my partner on one, as did my sister and many other people I know who were single after their 20s. It can be quite fun along the way so long as you take care, follow some basic rules and take things carefully.

HugeAckmansWife I met my last bloke on Plenty of Fish and was with him for 5 years so I know they do work, I just also know how many awful men there are out there on OLD... I might give it a go again at some point but would prefer to meet someone organically, preferably through a friend.
I'm 30 years after my 20s, so forgive me if I come across as cynical