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Original poster

Grandson Gift

32 replies

JS43 · 22/06/2021 11:32

My grandson wants a gaming pc. I bought second hand one for his birthday but neither his mum or dad (my son) will have it in their homes saying they don't have the space. He won't get the use out of it in mine. They do have the space and I feel they are just being spiteful. Grandson is going to miss out on something he really wants! I now also have to buy something else for his birthday on top of having already bought this. So angry!

OP posts:
LadyDanburysHat · 22/06/2021 11:34

I think it depends on the age of the child, if he is young then you should always check with parents first. If he's a teenager then I think the parents are being a bit much.

There is also the issue of some parents not wanting DC gaming because it can be addictive.

2ndtimemum2 · 22/06/2021 11:35

Is it big op? I'm guessing it's big and needs alot of space...did you discuss it with wither of the parents before buying it? Are you sure one of the parents weren't buying him one for his birthday?

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 22/06/2021 11:35

You really should have checked with the parents before buying that kind of a gift tbh.

Original poster
JS43 · 22/06/2021 11:37

He's a teen and its standard pc size and yes they knew but both probably assumed it was going in the others house.

OP posts:
Ohmygoshandfolly · 22/06/2021 11:37

Gaming PC’s are bulky. We have one and it’s a lot bigger than a regular PC, you also obviously need to have the room for a desk and chair somewhere so maybe they mean that? I’d have run it past them first personally.

Tangled22 · 22/06/2021 11:37

How old is he?

Did you speak to his parents before buying the gift? That is common courtesy, they may have got him a similar gift or have valid reasons for not wanting him to have his own PC yet.

LIZS · 22/06/2021 11:37

Maybe they want to limit his gaming time. Agree you should have asked them first.

Tangled22 · 22/06/2021 11:37

Sorry cross-posted with you. That’s very unfair of them, then! Can’t it just fit in his bedroom at one of their houses? They don’t even have to look at it.

Holly60 · 22/06/2021 11:38

I would definitely have checked with the parents before buying this.

Original poster
JS43 · 22/06/2021 11:41

He lives in 3 bed house with his mum and his dad lives in 3 bed house with his partner and 2 siblings. Neither said don't get it when I mentioned it.

OP posts:
Stompythedinosaur · 22/06/2021 11:46

I suppose it depends on whether they really don't have space or whether they don't want him to have it (both are reasonable) or whether there is another reason.

Original poster
JS43 · 22/06/2021 12:07

I think it's unfair on him. He's a good kid and doesn't ask for much. He told me he wanted one but they are too expensive so can't get one.

OP posts:
LIZS · 22/06/2021 12:29

Maybe the parents felt undermined if they could not afford it themselves.

RedHelenB · 22/06/2021 12:31

Have it at yours.

khakiandcoral · 22/06/2021 12:39

just because a child wants something, doesn't mean he should have it!!

You sound very nice, but why should you buy another gift? Nothing wrong with limiting game time to a grand parent house.

We have no space issue, but I would not allow any screen of any kind in a bedroom, for several reasons. They might reasonably not have that much space in the communal rooms, and if there are siblings around, it would be a pain to reserve the PC to one child.

PurpleyBlue · 22/06/2021 12:52

@JS43

He lives in 3 bed house with his mum and his dad lives in 3 bed house with his partner and 2 siblings. Neither said don't get it when I mentioned it.
Did you ask which house it should stay at? Presumably it would be the house of your child.
Florin · 22/06/2021 13:06

Did you ask if they had a desk and a chair or are you buying that too?

Bootskates · 22/06/2021 13:09

Just keep it at yours they arent saying he can't have it just that neither have the space

PollyBlue6 · 22/06/2021 13:30

What about a gaming laptop?
My husband is a gamer but we also live in a 3 bed and have zero room for a gaming computer, they are huge and usually have 2 screens, then the chair...

He has a laptop and fold away table.

suspiria777 · 22/06/2021 14:40

hmm, OP are you sure you even got something worth having? I don't mean that in an ungrateful way, but I definitely remember really wanting something for my birthday and ending up with a cheap knock off or second hand outdated version which was worse than just not having the thing I want. Imagine, for instance, really wanting an N64 but being given a second hand megadrive. Or really wanting an iphone but being given a windows phone. Or really wanting adidas trousers and being given dodgy two stripes.
When I was a kid, that would have been both mortifying and worse than nothing, because the parental/grandparental expectation that i should be happy and grateful created an additional emotional burden.

EverdeRose · 22/06/2021 17:31

Its a huge gift both in cost and size and really there should have been a consultation about where will it live, is it okay to buy such a huge present.
I'd feel undermined as a parent if a grandparent bought such a high value gift. I'd also be thinking 'god loads of screen time' and not want the fall out from that

EverdeRose · 22/06/2021 17:33

Have you also bought the desk and computer chair that will be needed for it.
Do they have fast enough Internet to run these games.

I'm just curious if what you've actually bought is going to end up being a present from you but have monetary effects on the parents.

sparkleshines · 22/06/2021 17:35

Maybe he could sell it and get a gaming laptop, like Alienware.

LynetteScavo · 22/06/2021 17:59

Why would his parents be spiteful towards you? Do you not have a good relationship with them?

Can you give a link to the computer you've bought for him?

Are you going to get the steering wheel, chair and also pay for the games?

Watchingyou2sleezes · 22/06/2021 19:28

Be prepared for a shock, there's a massive shortage of higher spec graphics cards at the moment, so a good quality gaming pc to see him through say 5 years or so may cost a LOT more than you're expecting.
One of my lot wanted me to buy him a graphics card last week off of eBay with a buy it now of £2300 (because it was a "bargain" that you can't get anywhere at the moment).

Foxtrot Oscar young man was my reply