HATE responses to complaints which just brush you off

[IBBaby]

It JUST boils my blood.

I write a complaint (in this case to a school regarding their admissions process - private school and not in UK so less transparency), specify exactly what my complaint is and why I'm making it, ask for an explanation to understand what happened (if I'm given a reasonable explanation I would withdraw complaint).
First made informal complaint to staff and then formal complaint to head, but getting brushed off with soundbites, generalized references to processes which are meaningless and irrelevant, explanations of decisions that I'm not even contesting, various platitudes and completely ignoring the specific questions I've asked.

I'll be escalating to parent company (as part of a UK based chain) but it just frustates me so mcuh!!! Just bloody be open Having a vent....

It can be frustrating, but yes there IS a process they legally have to follow when a complaint is made. Escalating to whoever won't make a blind bit of difference to that fact

Maybe your complaint is unfounded or ridiculous?

Every 'complainer' believes they have grounds for the complaint, many complaint 'receivers' feel the complaint isn't warranted. Reality, is probably 50/50 justified and non justified complaints!

Maybe your complaint is being given the attention it deserves 😆

Maybe, just maybe, there’s nothing more they can say. As a PP said, not every complaint is justified and that saying ‘the customer is always right…’ is actually rubbish, they’re not.

I would actually LOVE my complaint to be unfounded in this case. I would really love to be wrong on this.

All they have to do is provide an explanation to my questions, it's really not hard to do. If they can't answer them for whatever reason, say so and say why. Don't just ignore and smokescreen.

@Youarestillintherunning

It can be frustrating, but yes there IS a process they legally have to follow when a complaint is made. Escalating to whoever won't make a blind bit of difference to that fact

Perhaps in the UK. Not here. No legal requirement whatsoever.

I completely disagree with both pp's.

I don't agree that there's nothing they can say. Why don't try just answer op's specific questions then. Instead of providing info she didn't ask for?

'Unfounded or ridiculous' ? Then that too should be very very easy to answer, shouldn't it?

I'm going to infer you didn't get into the school you wanted for your kid, think you should have and are asking why they didn't? If they've given you an explanation at several levels- even if it's one you don't like, you probably need to stop. If this isn't a school that is going to be educating your child- and as a private school they can make that choice however they want, then you need to deal with your frustration and move on. They don't 'owe' you anything.

I want to ask about point A?

Let me tell you all about point B.

Err, I don't Want to know about point B. I didn't ask about point B. I asked about point A. Please just answer my specific question - i.e. can you not read? (Is what you really want to say!)

@maddiemookins16mum

Maybe, just maybe, there’s nothing more they can say. As a PP said, not every complaint is justified and that saying ‘the customer is always right…’ is actually rubbish, they’re not.

Not in this case. As an example of part of complaint. Th school made a decision regarding a course with an outside provider (at our cost) that my daughter couldn't do when a student in a similar situation had been allowed to do so while my daughter has a disability which means this would be a reasonable acommodation (in my view). There would be zero cost to the school, they'd only need to be flexible Of course I'm a reasonable person, I understand that there are variables in this decision that perhaps I'm not aware of. But I've only asked why this is the case? I am not complaining about the decision, I just want an explanation as to why. No one has explained the reason for this decision and why they won't make an accommodation for my daughter's disability when they did make an accommodation for a student previously. Again, I don't have a problem with being told no but I think they should tell me why. It's a reasonable request from a school, no? In my complaint I've only asked for an explanation. And in the responses I've not been provided either with an explanation or told why they can't give me one. I've just been brushed off. It's frustrating and creates a feeling that they are being intentionally evasive.

@Oblomov21

I want to ask about point A?

Let me tell you all about point B.

Err, I don't Want to know about point B. I didn't ask about point B. I asked about point A. Please just answer my specific question - i.e. can you not read? (Is what you really want to say!)

Yes!!! Exactly this!!!

They might feel that they have dealt with it adequately and have other bigger priorities to deal with now.

@SD1978

I'm going to infer you didn't get into the school you wanted for your kid, think you should have and are asking why they didn't? If they've given you an explanation at several levels- even if it's one you don't like, you probably need to stop. If this isn't a school that is going to be educating your child- and as a private school they can make that choice however they want, then you need to deal with your frustration and move on. They don't 'owe' you anything.

It's more complicated than that. My daughter has learning disabilities and is vulnerable. We were given misinformation from the start (documented) which led us continuing the process when if we would have been given correct information we wouldn't have done so. The whole thing was along the lines of me presenting my daughter and all her issues and challenges and asking if she can take x,y,z courses and if it's too much, can she do x,y courses. School saying 'of course, no problem, she can x,yz, or she can do x,y - we support everyone', inviting her for visits etc. And then the school turning around and saying 'Oh, we can't take her beause she wants to do x,y,z and we think she can only do x,y but we only take kids who we think can do x,y,z from the start' Even their published literature says that kids can do x,yz, or can do x,y from the start. So I'm asking the school, wait, what's your actual policy on this. Is it that kids have to do x,y,z from the start? In which case why did you tell my daughter that she didn't (on multiple ocassions) and why does your literature say the same? And if it's that kids can do x,y as you said, why have you told me that that's the reason you can't accept her?

And they won't answer this question!!!
(there is more to the complaint, this is just part)

I disagree that they don't owe me anything.
They have a duty of care to a vulnerable teenager to be open and transparent and mislead her.
And I have a reasonable expectation of honest and open communication - i wasted a ton of time and effort on this and had to pick up the pieces of my daughter who believed what they told her. I'm contesting the decision, as a mother of a child with SEN I'm well aware not every school can meet her needs, I'm contesting the process.

@bigfloweryblouse

They might feel that they have dealt with it adequately and have other bigger priorities to deal with now.

Possibly. I don't see how if they are acting in good faith though.

Should have said i'm NOT contesting the decision. It's the process and just explaining to me what happened and why we were misled (among others)

Having spent most of my working life dealing with financial services complaints, I share your frustration. It doesn't take much to provide a detailed explanation and/or accept failings. A PP suggested the complaint could be unfounded or ridiculous - this frustrates me! Most complaints arise from poor service delivery or poor understanding of the situation. All complainants should be treated the same and be provided with a detailed explanation. If someone feels strongly enough to go to the effort to complain then they deserve a full and detailed response.

@Devastatedyetagain

Having spent most of my working life dealing with financial services complaints, I share your frustration. It doesn't take much to provide a detailed explanation and/or accept failings. A PP suggested the complaint could be unfounded or ridiculous - this frustrates me! Most complaints arise from poor service delivery or poor understanding of the situation. All complainants should be treated the same and be provided with a detailed explanation. If someone feels strongly enough to go to the effort to complain then they deserve a full and detailed response.

Exactly. If I'm being ridiculous or my complaint is unfounded, then tell me (nicely ideally) and tell me why. Being evasive just makes me think the worst. That my complaint IS justified and they are trying to brush me off.

If questions are not being answered, write back and ask for the answers.

@newnortherner111

If questions are not being answered, write back and ask for the answers.

I have done. Not holding my breath though. I was very clear in my complaint as to what my questions were and I repeated them again. I'll give the school a chance though before escalating. Pleased that the parent company of the chain is UK-based as they may have a more robust complaints procedure.

I suspect you've got a very good case indeed.
They so want you to go away.
If they just had the grace and dignity to offer a feeble excuse of 'could've been dealt with / handled better' it would placate you.

But schools rarely do. I took my school complaint all the way, even further than the schools complaint procedure, to the Government.

It riled me when they stated that they're policy was 'to never apologise'.

You're in the wrong section. AIBU is not best. Get thread moved to SN section, the legal subsection. Many SN mums know all the law and are lawyers themselves. They know how to fight.

Yep it happens all the time and it pisses me off big time! If you listen to our current Government in UK (especially the prime minister) they are experts in this!

@MissyB1

Yep it happens all the time and it pisses me off big time! If you listen to our current Government in UK (especially the prime minister) they are experts in this!

Indeed!!! No accountability.

@Oblomov21

I suspect you've got a very good case indeed. They so want you to go away. If they just had the grace and dignity to offer a feeble excuse of 'could've been dealt with / handled better' it would placate you.

But schools rarely do. I took my school complaint all the way, even further than the schools complaint procedure, to the Government.

It riled me when they stated that they're policy was 'to never apologise'.

Thanks. I'm just venting my annoyance.

In the end, DD's has been accepted to lovely school, which will allow her to start x,y,z, take the externally provided course and move to x,y in the event she can't manage x,y,z. Very understanding and accommodating of her special needs and helping to set her up to succeed as much as we can. So it has worked out in the end.

Still pissed off though at behaviour of original school and may as well see the complaint through. i just need to be zen about it , whatever the eventual outcome.