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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be worried about DD?

5 replies

pudd0 · 21/06/2021 15:52

First post here but I've been lurking for a while

My daughter is almost 17, she gave birth last year. When she told me she was pregnant I wasn't happy and wanted her to have an abortion (I told her I wouldn't force her though) due to her being young and her boyfriend not being very mature and he didn't seem like a nice person. That caused a lot of arguments including her boyfriend swearing at me and saying it wasn't up to me. DD then went to stay with him and his mum for a bit and he seemed to just turn her against me during that time. Not long after DD came back home, she broke up with him as he was cheating and also got involved in drug dealing, DD wanted him to stop but he refused and DD was scared of him.

DD blocked him on everything until about a month before she gave birth. They became friends and then DD gave birth and he used to come and visit etc. A few months ago they got back together and DD started going to his.

A few weeks ago DD and my grandson moved in with him and his mum and since then she's been ignoring my messages or she's telling me to stop trying to interfere (which I'm not).

I'm just so worried about DD and my grandson because he doesn't seem very nice, he seems manipulative and controlling etc.

Any advice will be appreciated

OP posts:
pudd0 · 21/06/2021 16:28

Bump

OP posts:
Thevoiceofreason2021 · 21/06/2021 16:37

Can you arrange to see them once a week or babysit? Anything to keep in touch. She’ll come to her senses in time - unfortunately you can’t force it. Just tell her you want to see your grandchild and she can do what she likes.

Tal45 · 21/06/2021 16:37

I don't think you can really do anything apart from let her know your door is always open and you are always there for her and love her. The more you try to make her see sense the more she will rebel against it. I think you need to take a step back and just tell her you will be there when she needs you and wait for her to reach out to you.

pudd0 · 14/07/2021 15:43

DD and him broke up about 2 weeks ago. DD said it was for no reason in particular and that they're friends, although hes only seen my grandson once since.

OP posts:
30degreesandmeltinghere · 14/07/2021 15:49

Ime never mention the ex.... Or give parenting advice!!
Be supportive of dd's decisions however small. Give her the confidence to be a great dm.
I left home at 17 after a mc and went on to have a dd at 17..My dm's attitude ruined our relationship forever more... Be kind to dd. She needs it.
And congratulations on becoming a dgm!!

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