Double barrelled surname

[3LittleDucksQuack]

A friend has a dc with a double barrelled surname so
Child Name 1 name 2. Name (1 being her surname. Name 2 being her exh surname.)

The dc often writes it as name.. Then just the Initial of Name 1 and then name 2,
Eg Bobby R Turner rather than Bobby Robinson Turner. His dad also does the same. It's not hyphoned just down as 2 names.

My friend goes nuts over this, scribbles it out and writes Bobby Robinson Turner!

I can see why she finds it frustrating however I also think it's not thay big of a deal. She can't bear it looking like the dc has just the fathers surname now they've split up.

I couldn't get worked up over something like this my ds has his df surname. It's never massively bothered me that he doesn't have my name. We chose his df name as we were together at the time. And planned a life till things changed. That's who my son is.

Yanbu = it's silly to scribble it out and re write
Yabu = you'd prob do the same.

@Willyoujustbequiet

I agree with her

My dc have double barrelled no hyphen but have dropped my ex name as he is absent. I knew from a very early age that my children would share my name. I despise the misogyny behind the patriarchal tradition which is thankfully dying out.

Just because you dont get her feelings about it doesn't make her wrong.

Err no, the tradition is most certainly NOT dying out!

I despise the pretense behind nouveau double-barrelled surnames, they manage to be both grandiose and low class all at the same time. Terribly ignoble.

@OllyBJolly

Children should have their mother's name*. I know a lot see double barrelling as a compromise but it really isn't. I don't know any children who have retained the double barrelled name past babyhood, despite knowing many families who intended to have double barrelled names. One of the names - almost exclusively the mothers' - will drop off before school.

*and women shouldn't lose their name on marriage!

This is rubbish. My children are 11 and 7 and continue to use their double-barrelled, hyphenated surname.

I despise the pretense behind nouveau double-barrelled surnames, they manage to be both grandiose and low class all at the same time. Terribly ignoble. maybe stop judging people by their names.

@HowToBringABlushToTheSnow

I despise the pretense behind nouveau double-barrelled surnames, they manage to be both grandiose and low class all at the same time. Terribly ignoble.

Whereas not knowing how to spell or punctuate or the meanings of words you use is noble, I suppose.

The dds and both dh and I have double barrelled surnames without a hyphen. Dh mainly uses his old surname. Dd and me tend to use mine. But on official papers we make sure to use it correctly

I think it's fair enough she wants his name written correctly. Ex obviously is happy to go along with it because it's not his name being cut out, but it doesn't make him right.