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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be absolutely fed up and to tell her so?

58 replies

Babycarrottt · 20/06/2021 09:12

I honestly don't know whether I'm being unreasonable or not. My partner and I are landlords of a flat and a shop. This morning I received an email from our remaining tenant (there were three but two have moved out) complaining about some building rubble that has been left in the yard. We are currently having work completed on the shop and some rubble bags have been left in the yard in order for someone to take them away for us.

The tenant has sent me an email complaining about the building waste as she isn't due to leave the property until the 30th and she wants to have friends around and these few rubble bags is causing her an inconvenience.

I know about the building waste because it was my partner who put it there.

The yard is shared usage between the flat and shop but because the shop has been empty they've had sole usage.

The bags are in a corner out of her way and does not stop her using the yard.

I'm angry because we consider ourselves to be good landlords. Examples of such include allowing them to move in a week early without charge at the start of the their tenancy. To help them source furniture, we reduced the deposit amount so they could afford furniture.

As soon as she signed, she started with the complaints and ridiculous demands. I mentioned in passing that the flat was being decorated prior to her moving in. She then sent me links to various "artwork" (posters) that she had as she wanted us to choose complimentary colours (we painted everywhere white). In October, she complained that the house was cold when the heating wasn't on. She also complained that the drain was blocked (she'd blocked it with food waste), she complained that we'd painted incorrectly and that we'd left the paint "upset) so she had paint all over her expensive coat (it wasn't paint, it was dust). When there were mice in the shop and we put down traps (they could hear them in the flat), she complained that when we said that we would not be pulling up floorboards to get rid of any decaying mice. She complained about the boiler not working (she hadn't switched it on). When the boiler did break down, we had a new one installed within three days. She complained because again it was not switched on and she wanted the gas engineer to press the power button.

There have been so many ridiculous complaints but we were looking forward to the end of this month as they are all moving out. I received an email from her on Wednesday along with a picture of the door to the utility cupboard which the tenants have somehow managed to snap in half. The door is about 3/4 of an inch for reference.

I am currently in hospital with pancreatitis and gallstones. I'm really not well, I'm missing my seven week old and things are just generally stressful.

The email from her has really struck a nerve because I can't believe how unaware she is of her poor behaviour. I've emailed her back and told her that it's shared usage so we can put rubble bags in there. She did the same type of thing last year when we had a builder out. She claimed that he had piled rubble outside of the front door of the flat so she was struggling to get in. I called our builder and asked if he'd remove any rubbish that was in her way. He facetimed me and showed me the entrance. The closest rubble was about 8 ft away and there was no obstruction.

I also said that I'm stunned that she would send such an email considering the damage she has caused to the property. I said that I've done my best to accommodate her despite her sometimes ridiculous requests but that I don't want her to contact me again unless it's an absolute emergency.

The email is professional but I'm not sure if I was unreasonable for responding in the way I did.

I know that landlords get slated on here and it's the right call in a lot of cases but as a rule before our tenants move in, I even send a link to Shelter's page on landlord's responsibilities and I send our tenants a link to the local tenant's union so they know who to go to should we treat them badly.

I know this is long but I'm just so angry with her. It's particularly frustrating as she can be really snotty with me but when she sees my partner she's very "girly", twirls her hair etc. and tells him I exaggerate the problems or that there isn't a problem at all.

Rant over.

OP posts:
lobsterkiller · 20/06/2021 09:19

No, the email is fine. You have not been unreasonable at all. She sounds a nightmare and roll on the end of the month for you. She's in for a shock if she's moving into another rented property.

Hope you're better soon.

KarlUrbansWife · 20/06/2021 09:21

Ugh, what a nightmare she is. You have been so much more than reasonable throughout her tenancy. Only 10 days to go....Just make sure you're watertight if you need to keep any of her deposit.
Hope you're better soon x

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 20/06/2021 09:39

That does sound really annoying. Can you let dp deal with it.

UmamiMammy · 20/06/2021 09:55

You are not being unreasonable to be upset by the email.
The warning signs were there before they moved in, next time you will be more cautious.
Letting someone move in early was a very risky thing to do!!!!

Crepescular · 20/06/2021 09:56

Such a nightmare having a tenant who actually has opinions about where she lives!

It must've been so hard taking all that money off her for rent when she kept complaining...

Cheeseandlobster · 20/06/2021 10:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Cherrysoup · 20/06/2021 10:02

@Crepescular come on! Demanding artwork, snapping a door in half, moaning that there are rubbish bags and wanting to pay less deposit so she can get furniture? None of these are normal demands.

I think the OP should have realised she was a trauma before she moved on. I would not negativity tenants re reducing deposit, that’s a huge red flag. Not charging for moving in a week early is also above and beyond. Be firmer with your next tenants, OP, of course they’ll take the piss if they don’t get told no.

WorraLiberty · 20/06/2021 10:04

@Crepescular

Such a nightmare having a tenant who actually has opinions about where she lives!

It must've been so hard taking all that money off her for rent when she kept complaining...

Have you actually read the OP? 🙄
Cheeseandlobster · 20/06/2021 10:10

@Crepescular

Such a nightmare having a tenant who actually has opinions about where she lives!

It must've been so hard taking all that money off her for rent when she kept complaining...

I love how my post is deleted for pointing out the utter unreasonable tone of this post.

You obviously have not read the op. What a horrible snarky post

billy1966 · 20/06/2021 10:10

OP,
You have probably been too accommodating.

I rent many flats over a period of a decade and we never contacted a landlord once with a complaint.

Is she going to be looking for a reference?

If so, you can note that in it.

I hope you feel better soon.

Remind her via email that she had better leave the flat in perfect order.

DaphneMoonsSeattle · 20/06/2021 10:10

No I get it what Crepescular is trying to say. It's so unfair to have to have over some money for the tiny, insignificant, trivial little thing of having a roof over your head! Maybe OP should actually pay the tenant for the warmth of their company.

Cheeseandlobster · 20/06/2021 10:13

@DaphneMoonsSeattle

No I get it what Crepescular is trying to say. It's so unfair to have to have over some money for the tiny, insignificant, trivial little thing of having a roof over your head! Maybe OP should actually pay the tenant for the warmth of their company.
Don't be ridiculous. The obvious solution is to just give the tenant the property. The op obviously doesn't need it Wink
ScaredOfDinosaurs · 20/06/2021 10:17

She's a ridiculous person and you have been more than patient.

Bluntness100 · 20/06/2021 10:21

Honestly? Yes she’s a pita but you should just have forwarded it to hour partner to deal with it. Sometimes there is no point in engaging with some people, it just escalates it, you’re not well, you should have just let him sort it.

And congrats on your baby, I hope you get better soon 💐

Thingstodotoday · 20/06/2021 10:22

@Crepescular what a lame comment! Could you manage to make yourself sound any more bitter? Grin

Babycarrottt · 20/06/2021 10:24

Thanks for the (mostly) supportive messages.

The warning signs only really started after they'd signed the contract but I thought she'd calm down after she was settled in. Another such instance was her complaining that she'd had a council tax bill. As a responsible landlord, I pass all of the new tenant's details on to the relevant organisations. She was unhappy about this as she said that she was a full time student and therefore I shouldn't have given her details across to them. Only thing is that she hadn't actually told me that she was a student and I'd gone off the information that she'd given to the reference checking service. In that, she states that she works full time. She also complained about the shower head as she "didn't like the look of it" and wanted us to replace it.

She also complained when the boiler stopped working that her and her flatmate were at risk of legionnaires disease. Whilst this can happen where there is standing water, the water at the flat is directly from the mains with no water tanks. I saw them on the Wednesday and saw that the boiler was beyond repair. They had a new working boiler by 3pm on the Friday. Another incident was just before Christmas. Their fridge, bought from the previous tenants, stopped working. They claimed that it was freezing up and that they couldn't fit food in. Despite it not being our fridge or our problem. We were going to give them £50 towards a second hand fridge. My partner went to look at it and magically "fixed" it. The problem came down to them not closing the freezer door properly.

We let them move in early as the property was finished and I didn't see the point in it just being empty so when she asked if she could leave her things in the flat, I agreed.
I'm fully aware that being a landlord is a privilege, to claim otherwise would be nothing short of insulting.

Also, the reason we agreed to reducing the deposit is because both tenants were furloughed and we wanted to help them out even in a small way.

I feel for any landlord that gets her in the future. She's going to get a shock if she thinks that other landlords are as accommodating as we have been.

OP posts:
IDontReadEyebrows · 20/06/2021 10:25

I think you’ve been pretty restrained tbh. I wouldn’t reply to her anymore for now unless it’s urgent- building rubble in the yard is not urgent- and when someone does need to reply to her let your husband deal with her assuming he’s got time to. I’m guessing he’s got his hands full with a small baby and you being in hospital. Hope you’re better soon and you get tenants who aren’t dicks next time.

AnnaSW1 · 20/06/2021 10:25

I'd literally just reply with what you said above "the yard is shared usage between the flat and the shop"

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 20/06/2021 10:29

Renting isn't cheap, Op. People rightly want the best for their money and want perfection. If she's pissed off about rubble then you have to acknowledge that. Wether you agree or not. If you can't handle complaints as daft and small as they may be to you perhaps you shouldn't be Landlord/Lady.

newnortherner111 · 20/06/2021 10:29

If there was an awful tenant's register to warn anyone letting a property then your tenant should be on it. (There will never be one of course).

Please exercise restraint when your tenant leaves and do not get too drunk in celebration.

Thehop · 20/06/2021 10:31

Yikes. Hang in there and count down the days! Also tell her to replace the door or hold from the deposit.

I really hope you’re home well soon, it must be hideous being away from your baby x

PlanDeRaccordement · 20/06/2021 10:33

99% YANBU. Only 1% is BU because her complaints about mice getting in from the shop and to pull up a floor boards to remove decaying mice were the only not ridiculous complaints. But, I can understand you frustration as the tenant is like the boy who cried wolf story, she makes so many false and petty complaints, that it’s hard to see one is that is legitimate when it happens.

Newmumatlast · 20/06/2021 10:33

@Bluntness100

Honestly? Yes she’s a pita but you should just have forwarded it to hour partner to deal with it. Sometimes there is no point in engaging with some people, it just escalates it, you’re not well, you should have just let him sort it.

And congrats on your baby, I hope you get better soon 💐

Agree with this. Based on what you've said the tenant has been unreasonable but you probably shouldn't have responded as you did and referred it to your partner to respond. But its done now and isn't the end of the world. Rest up and take care xxx
CaptainBarbossa · 20/06/2021 10:34

She's a CF but you've also not kept good professional boundaries here. Obviously she is the primary problem, but by you offering money for the fridge, reducing deposit, letting them move in early etc. you have made this situation worse. Once she is out, please have clearer boundaries with the next tenant, and make sure everything you are and are not responsible for are outlined in the tenancy agreement before they move on (and don't let them move in early or pay less!). You may have another bad tenant or a great one, either way it's important to have a proper agreement about all this stuff, even more so if you can be on the soft side IRL.

pigsDOfly · 20/06/2021 10:34

@DaphneMoonsSeattle

No I get it what Crepescular is trying to say. It's so unfair to have to have over some money for the tiny, insignificant, trivial little thing of having a roof over your head! Maybe OP should actually pay the tenant for the warmth of their company.
Yes, there does seem to be the idea with a lot of MNers that paying rent in order to keep yourself housed is a terrible imposition and landlords, rather than providing a service, are highway robbers who are exploiting their vulnerable tenants. Do these people think the roof over their heads should be free.

I often wonder how these people feel when they go into Tesco or Sainburys and hand over their cash for the food they're buying.

Do they think they should just be able to walk into the supermarket and take what they want and Tesco or Sainburys (other supermarkets are available) will smile and wave them on their way.

They're both businesses and both are entitled to charge the market rate for the service they're providing.

Oddly enough you don't seem to get people having the same attitude towards mortgage companies and the huge interest rates they charge for the money they lend.