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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask for help with financial pickle

880 replies

ShoebillStork · 19/06/2021 18:11

In 2009 FIL had a win on the Premium Bonds. He gave us £10,000 to invest for DS (at low risk) and the money to be given to DS when he's 18.

I put the money towards a loft conversion. DS is 18 soon and I'm due to remortgage for a better rate. How much do I need to release for him so he gets the £10k plus what it might have gained in interest since 2009.

And should I encourage DS to get a Help to Buy ISA with it?

OP posts:
sunglassesonthetable · 20/06/2021 21:55

Have to disagree, because when i know that the kid has been effectively missed out on somewhere between £10k to £50k based on risk, on top of the original £10k,

Like most people are missing out on by the sound of it.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 20/06/2021 21:55

@ShoebillStork go with 5% compounded interest over 12 years.

Ignore most of the comments on here.

Wheretobuy · 20/06/2021 21:56

Anyway, we've been deducting expenses for years - dirty nappies, washing, cleaning, emotional support, etc I think DD1 owes us by now!
Which I am sure you planned to pay for before the money from the will became a reality and before you had your DC!

sunglassesonthetable · 20/06/2021 22:00

Have to disagree, because when i know that the kid has been effectively missed out on somewhere between £10k to £50k based on risk, on top of the original £10k,

The request was low risk.

You could argue that every child with basic investments is missing out.

You could also argue that not every child needs their own space.

Bard6817 · 20/06/2021 22:06

@sunglassesonthetable doubling your money over 10-12 years is low risk.

Savings accounts returns of 1% are no risk.

Harmonypuss · 20/06/2021 22:08

@sunglassesonthetable

^All our children 'benefit' from anything we may do to improve our homes but most of us don't 'dip into' their piggy banks to make those improvements.

DS specifically benefited. I would feel differently if OP had the new attic conversion for herself.

OP used the money but as part of a plan which involved refunding ( with interest). Like most things it comes down to wether you have the cash or not. Lucky if you do, eh.^

Personally, I made improvements to my home, one of which was to my DS's bedroom. I didn't have spare cash floating around, I took out a loan. My son benefited from the improvements made to the whole house and specifically his bedroom but I certainly didn't use his savings to make those improvements.

We, as parents, are expected to do what we can for our children but we don't expect them to pay for it!

sunglassesonthetable · 20/06/2021 22:11

FIL. £15,00 you say, lad ? Excellent.

DS Yeah thanks Gramps. Want to go for a spin in the wip? Just round the block though. Got to run the hoover round the cool attic room. I want to keep my 5 star rating.

I know, ridiculous. DS is not going to be hoovering.

MolyHolyGuacamole · 20/06/2021 22:12

@ShoebillStork

I'm starting to think this a troll. Your comments about bedroom's haven't added up. WHy would they need to share in a 3 bed house?

Let me spell it out for you:
3 bedroom =
1 for DP & me
1 for DP office - he works from home and has a lot of equipment
1 for DS which DSS used to share before I committed fraud/stole from my son and did a loft conversion.

Right I'm in the car ...

You forgot 'and got a new man'
Bard6817 · 20/06/2021 22:13

@sunglassesonthetable Yes anyone with Cash ISA’s are missing out. That was my first ISA too and it barely returned inflation and thus I missed out too. It took a bit of effort to understand Stocks and Shares ISA’s were different, then a bit of effort to gamble on a fund or an equity.

But then amazon, microsoft, apple shares are all known about for decades now, and a bit more digging tells you, that you can invest in a fund and not be at the whim of single shares.

And that all depends on having a bit of spare cash. It’s not difficult. It’s just not as widely understood how easy it can be.

sunglassesonthetable · 20/06/2021 22:13

We, as parents, are expected to do what we can for our children but we don't expect them to pay for it!

When DS receives the 14/15 thousand ( can't remember which ) OP decided do you still count that as him 'paying' for the extension?

sunglassesonthetable · 20/06/2021 22:14

And that all depends on having a bit of spare cash. It’s not difficult. It’s just not as widely understood how easy it can be.

Exactly. Nothing criminal going on here.

Bard6817 · 20/06/2021 22:19

@sunglassesonthetable If you give £10k to an advisor, and they return £14k to you after 10 years even though the company it was invested in, achieved “spectacual” performance and doubled (or more) in value, would you accept it?

I wouldn’t. I’d report them.

Wheretobuy · 20/06/2021 22:20

I don’t know if it’s exactly criminal. It’s immoral and OP knows this will cause a rift, hence the secrecy.

Wheretobuy · 20/06/2021 22:21

[quote Bard6817]@sunglassesonthetable If you give £10k to an advisor, and they return £14k to you after 10 years even though the company it was invested in, achieved “spectacual” performance and doubled (or more) in value, would you accept it?

I wouldn’t. I’d report them.[/quote]
I would too.

Thehouseofmarvels · 20/06/2021 22:34

Will FIL not ask DS exactly what has happened to the money and how it grew with the investments? He may want to personally assist DS in putting it towards a house deposit. Would FIL not get slighly annoyed when OP talks to him about how the amount should be 14,250 ( or whatever previous poster calculated) if it was put in a junior isa but that she is taking a management fee and rounding it down to 14k. What if FIL does not like the idea of OP taking a management fee? Also Op has talked about her son getting his 'grubby hands' on the money, I hope she will not say that to FIL ! He might see it as his grandsons rightful gift not something he is getting his grubby hands on? If anyone else invested 10k in a property they would expect a return on that investment from the increase of property value. If FIL tells son this but Op only wants to give 14k. Lastly how much did DSS stay and for how many years since the loft was done? If it every other weekend for a few years thats not the same as sharing a room for a whole childhood onna permanent basis. In the latter situation having a your own room is more vauable.

3moons · 20/06/2021 22:39

I think you made a sound decision that benefited everyone in the family due to your smart thinking- and was low risk as intended

TSSDNCOP · 20/06/2021 22:40

FGS, criminal? Are you shitting me?

If FIL, that savvy premium bond investor, was that bothered he'd have invested the money himself in gilt.

For the record, I've paid DS back the 20 I swiped from his birthday money. But should I alert the rozzers?

sunglassesonthetable · 20/06/2021 22:43

*le If you give £10k to an advisor, and they return £14k to you after 10 years even though the company it was invested in, achieved “spectacual” performance and doubled (or more) in value, would you accept it?

I wouldn’t. I’d report them.*

👍🏻 Excellent But missing the point.

if you'd put the money in a Junior ISA ( as millions do - not withstanding their duty of care ) what would be the interest rate be? And the consensus is about £4/5,000.

Thehouseofmarvels · 20/06/2021 22:45

@KateOr you say your daughter inhearited 15k and you spent it on the house. You say she owes you for dirty nappies ect but I happen to know a bit of law due to my brother being a solicitor. I believe that legally the money your daughter inhearited would be seen as hers. Its not impossible that she might be talking about how to put together a deposit one day and some relative says to her ' well you inhearited that money didn't you? Use that ! Could be good to give her her inhearitance plus interest for a house deposit ? To avoid an awkward situation if someone tells her about it !

Bard6817 · 20/06/2021 22:47

@TSSDNCOP Nope - kid has had somewhere between 10k to 50k defrauded from him by my guessing.

If an advisor did this, and kept the profits themselves as the OP has with the property value increase, id be gutted if it wasn’t jail time when it got to court.

Thehouseofmarvels · 20/06/2021 22:48

Op has said that FIL will not be happy, but probably best to just tell him and DS the truth and hope FIL is ok with it after possibly having a grumble. Theres not real option except to be honest.

sunglassesonthetable · 20/06/2021 22:50

*@TSSDNCOP Nope - kid has had somewhere between 10k to 50k defrauded from him by my guessing.

If an advisor did this, and kept the profits themselves as the OP has with the property value increase, id be gutted if it wasn’t jail time when it got to court.*

Here we go again. 🙄😂

Bard6817 · 20/06/2021 22:52

@sunglassesonthetable. interactive investor, Junior isa, not withstanding the annual limits, invested in a standard sp500 fund at 8% pa, for ten years, the total payable at 18 would be £22,500.

sunglassesonthetable · 20/06/2021 22:54

I have no idea Bard. Going with the consensus on here . You're the one coming out with the big numbers and the talk of CPS, prosecuting and defrauding. 🙄

VestaTilley · 20/06/2021 22:57

YWBVU to use your DS’ money to convert your loft. That’s theft.

Make sure he gets it all back.