Anyone else feel fat, frumpy and untrendy?

[Onewayoranother88]

I live in Manchester, and go to the Northern Quarter sometimes, if anyone knows it.
All the girls are around 22, incredibly slim and I'm only a 6-8, but they're all built like supermodels by the looks of it.
All seem to have very niche styles and interests, artists, musicians and so on.
How can so many just know what suits them and look so good?
They all seem so intelligent and with trendy, well paid jobs too, if not students.
It's a confidence thing, I know. I have things going for me and I'm attractive, just feel like I'd be a complete outcast among these sort of people. My boyfriend has friends like this but I don't feel part of this world at all. I know he loves me for who I am but I just wish I had more confidence. Anyone else felt like this?

Op you saw something you didn't like in the way your boyfriend was interacting with this woman and now you're seeing her everywhere.

What is it that's really bothering you? Do you know? I'm not saying for one second there is anything going on between them but something has upset you - is your relationship missing a spark it used to have or do you feel unappreciated or...?

I can relate. My ex once made a very pointed and ill-timed remark about a particular ethnicity. I do not fit the description but his previous two girlfriends did. I used to get a feeling of dread whenever I saw a female who looked like that on the street, it really ate me up.

Honestly my relationship wasn't happy, I didn't feel happy and secure. Do you?

I can sympathise to a point OP. I’m nearly 50 but live in an area where quite a few of the mums are real yummy mummy types. I’m a good 5-10 years older than the vast majority of mums from my younger two DC’s friendship groups. I am very average in face and figure compared to many of them, too, and very often feel old and frumpy. I wasn’t born with the cool, effortlessly stylish gene .

But you know what? I’m actually fairly happy with the way I look, and I’d certainly rather look like me and enjoy my life than look like them and have theirs. Virtually all the gorgeous slender super-toned yummy mum types are neurotic, anxious about their looks and bodies, very self centred and constantly working on their appearances. There’s a huge amount of disordered eating and obsessive, relentless face and body maintenance (gym, classes, diets, beauty procedures, Botox, you name it, they’re doing it).

I would bet a lot of money that those beautiful skinny girls you’re admiring are a neurotic, writhing mass of insecurity underneath all that glossy perfection.

Seriously, OP I think you need to talk to someone about body dysmorphia. You see yourself as fat/unattractive and you see the NQ as being full of model types, when it's really really not (its famous for being full of an eclectic/alternative/diverse crowd).

I honestly dont know where really groomed smart tidy people find the time. Im always dashing about, i have to schedule in extra time to polish if i have a 'do' - others achieve the same thing every day

Don’t know the Northern Quarter but I recently visited Manchester and noticed that were loads of attractive/trendy types, all perfectly groomed just to go shopping. I felt like a bit of a tramp in comparison.

Come to Norfolk, no expectations here!