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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

For not picking up a dead cat in the road?

22 replies

GoodGrief100 · 16/06/2021 08:27

Driving home last night and happened to see a poor cat dead on the side of the road as I was driving past. Popped something on the local FB page when home to ask if anyone had lost their cat and gave as many details as I could. Woken up to a bunch of shares and general comments of how sad it is etc. One person has decided to blast me though for not stopping and picking it up...said they were 'disappointed and how would I feel if it were my pet?'. I haven't responded. I was driving through a town I don't live in and thought it would be a nice thing to just put it out there in case the owner was worrying. I absolutely have no intention of picking up a dead cat because A. I'm squeamish and it looked like all it's insides were now outside, B. I don't own a pet of any kind and wouldn't have a clue what to do with the body and C. I'd just finished work and just wanted to get home. Part of me knows I'm being a bit selfish, but is it really my responsibility to pick up dead pets from the side of roads? First time I've ever posted something like this on a FB page so don't know what the etiquette is. AIBU for not picking it up, or is that the done thing??

OP posts:
moanyhole · 16/06/2021 08:29

What would you do with the dead cat after picking it up. The cat was dead with insides out- surely that's a health hazard. I pass dead animals a lot, I'm sure a lot of us do, Ive never picked one up

Wanttocry · 16/06/2021 08:32

YANBU, are they being serious? Pick up a dead animal and put it in your car? What did they want you to do with it once you had it home, clear out it space in your freezer?

bewilderedhedgehog · 16/06/2021 08:33

Don't worry, I would definitely not have stopped to pick it up, and you were thoughtful to put it on the facebook page. Sensible not to respond I think....

PracticingPerson · 16/06/2021 08:38

I wouldn't post anything on FB about this sort of thing, you just attract grief.

Menora · 16/06/2021 08:39

I did pick one up in my street and took it to a vet. It was all intact but it was really horrible to pick it up to be honest I found it hard to do

The reason I did this was because it was in the middle of the street and going to get further run over also no collar and needed to get it scanned for a microchip

Someone did pick up my dead cat when she was run over and the vet scanned her and called me

As a gesture it’s kind to pick them up and get them to a vet because it saves the owner having to go searching and identify the body which may have been run over even more times

But I don’t blame people for not wanting to pick them up.
I may have moved it out of the road though, but not if it was already in a very bad way

Sparklfairy · 16/06/2021 08:40

What were you supposed to do, bring it home, find the owner and do a handover? Confused

I can do one better. I was staying at my DMs and was looking at the local fb group. Someone posted that they had found a dead ginger cat that had been run over, at the end of DMs (small, very rural) road.

DM has a cat, and I've only seen two other local cats, one of which of which was ginger and lived at the neighbours at the back. Knowing I would want to know, and having had cats disappear before and never finding out what happened to them, I plucked up the courage to go round, even though I've never met them.

I knocked, and a woman answered the door with two very young children playing indoors behind her. I told the neighbour what I'd seen on fb, and just said I'd want to know if it was me, and left it at that.

Her ginger cat appeared in DMs garden a few days later.

I told the poor woman her cat was probably dead and he wasn't Blush

I stay away from fb now Blush

SticksAndStoned · 16/06/2021 08:41

If you want to respond, just say that you don't live in the town, you were just passing through, and didn't think it would be fair to take the cat further away from it's owner.

But then they'd probably tell you you should have taken it to the local vet or something, so you are best to leave it. If it's your post you might be able to delete that response and maybe even make it so nobody can respond.

Nicolastuffedone · 16/06/2021 08:41

I have cat phobia. I can’t be within 100 miles if a live cat, definitely couldn’t have picked up a dead one!! What were you expected to do with the poor thing anyway!!!

Ducksurprise · 16/06/2021 08:42

Honestly you did a nice thing. I'm fucking sick of the fb vigilantes that like to impose their views. Picking up cold dead cats is not for everyone, there is nothing wrong with that.

redcarbluecar · 16/06/2021 08:43

Jesus, I don’t think I’d have picked it up, rightly or wrongly. Ignore the fb message anyway.

swapsicles · 16/06/2021 08:46

The only reason to pick up a cat is to check its collar for its owners details or take to a vets for a microchip scan to alert the owners.
It happened to my mums cat, the person who knocked her over moved the body to the side of the road but it was 5am and left in a quiet place no footpath so without the call we may never have known, they did call a bit later though.
The owners would be very grateful and by putting up a local fb post someone would have been willing to move the animal, tagging local rescues might help too.
I could probably move an injured or intact cat but not an inside out one.

motogogo · 16/06/2021 08:48

You did the right thing, I wouldn't scoop it up either, though if there was a collar with a name tag (few owners bother) you could have told them of course.

InpatientGardener · 16/06/2021 08:50

YANBU, I found my poor cat dead by my house in a horrible state and whilst it might have been nicer to have had the choice to see her like that or not had some passer by taken her to the vet, it is absolutely not an expectation and I think I would struggle to deal with a mangled dead cat that wasn't my own as well! All the vet would do is scan for microchip and contact the owners and you've already made your own efforts to let the owners know. People post 'seen a dead cat of x colour on x Road all the time in my local area and normally someone with more time/inclination will go and take it to a vet. Never seen any comments like you had!

LeroyJenkinssss · 16/06/2021 08:52

I’ve only picked up one dead cat and that was because it was recently dead and I knew it was my neighbours. Otherwise I’ve never stopped

CanofCant · 16/06/2021 08:56

@Ducksurprise

Honestly you did a nice thing. I'm fucking sick of the fb vigilantes that like to impose their views. Picking up cold dead cats is not for everyone, there is nothing wrong with that.
Agree with this. It's easy for arseholes on Facebook to theoretically state what they would have done. Ignore them.
GoodGrief100 · 16/06/2021 08:57

Well I'm pleased I've not been unreasonable. To be honest, I've seen this person post on the FB page quite a bit and they're a bit of a tyrant and seem to nit pick at a lot of stuff posted (I remember one telling someone they shouldn't leave stuff to give away for free outside their house as it looks messy Confused ). I'm definitely not going to respond and it looks like people are completely ignoring her based on other comments. I'll leave the post up in case the owner does see it - hopefully they do.

OP posts:
Mochudubh · 16/06/2021 09:39

You can report dead animals (and other roadkill) to your local council and they will send someone to remove it (my DH used to work in Roads Dept).

I doubt if they scan them though.

GreyhoundG1rl · 16/06/2021 09:40

Ignore them, they're nuts.

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 16/06/2021 09:49

And do what? Go door to door with it? You have no idea if it had a microchip or not or how long it had been there. If its insides were outside it was likely already incubating maggots. It would have been unpleasant to handle at best and at worst a health hazard. I wouldn't have picked it up and I love animals. I get upset over roadkill.

takingmytimeonmyride · 16/06/2021 09:50

I went to pick up a dead cat I drove past once, but only because it was round the corner from my house so I went home first to get bags and gloves. When I got back the owner was there Sad so I helped her put it into a box. It wasn't a nice sight at all, and I wouldn't have collected it if it hadn't have been so close to home. You can't just put a dead cat in your car with nothing to put it on or pick it up with!

makingmyway10 · 16/06/2021 09:57

Oh gosh I had a similar experience at my old house. We lived on a fairly busy road and one morning I found a poor dead cat by my driveway on the grass verge. I checked it was not alive and noted it had no collar. I then telephoned the council who came very quickly to collect it as it was a school morning and lots of children walk past on their way to school. They came within 30 mins. I then posted on the local Facebook page with a description of the cat and stated that I had called the council to collect it. I was berated by the cats owner who felt I should have taken it into my house and tried to find the owner!

I did my best and had the cat been alive I would have taken it to the vet myself but it was very gone and not in a good way.

The owner posted a pic and asked if it was that cat and I could confirm that it was. I apologised for her loss and gave her the council number. She telephoned them but they had disposed of the cat already as it was horribly injured. She then was very cross with me . Sad

TakeYourFinalPosition · 16/06/2021 10:04

My foster parents used to pick up any dead cats and take them to the vets… who’d then store them for a few days incase anyone came forward for them. I have no idea if that’s still the etiquette… but I don’t think you can complain if people haven’t. It’s a big ask.

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