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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask about Hysterectomy experiences

56 replies

Nats1984 · 15/06/2021 16:04

So I’ve just booked a private consultation after losing patience with the NHS. It’s Friday. After then I’m told just 4 weeks until the rotten things comes out. I have 4 separate conditions of the uterus , have been blue lighted to hospital with haemorrhage and needed transfusion and still I’m suffering and handed packets of tablets that don’t really work. Mirena was a disaster and all hormone Based treatments have failed. 36 year old, chunky but not big. Reasonably fit. What shall I expect post op? I was home 24 hrs after EMCS and doing a Tesco shop on day 4 ( well dosed up on painkillers) I suspect this might be a bit more severe though. Will book help for 2 weeks as youngest is only 4. Will that be enough? And am I strange to be absolutely buzzing that the week each month of agony and flooding and passing out might be over before august Smile

OP posts:
Mixitupalot · 15/06/2021 16:18

Hi op, what prompted you to go private. I am also 36 and my periods sound similar, I also have a cervical erosion and several other things they can’t explain (because the waiting lists are so long and they won’t investigate) I am in agony most of the time and I’ve been out on a 3 year waiting list.

Nats1984 · 15/06/2021 16:22

I’ve just had enough! I honestly can’t take it anymore . I’ve missed weddings, exams, a driving test etc and I’ve literally just managed to scrape the money together. It’s my birthday present to myself this year, I’ve been losing clots bigger than my hand today and was terrified is faint at the school gate . So I rang them and booked it! I see her Friday

OP posts:
Mixitupalot · 15/06/2021 16:29

Well done, I know it’s a lot to take on and it’s very scary. A hysterectomy is a massive operation and it will take at least 6 months to recover. Do you have good support at home?

Bridezillamaybe · 15/06/2021 16:33

Hi, I don't want to disagree with the pp who said six months is the recovery time but that wasn't my experience. I'm 8 weeks on and really feeling good. I was nervous about sex but it was fine.

Don't take any risks with lifting. It's hard to say no to your child but you could really damage yourself. No swimming, baths or sex for six weeks.

Nats1984 · 15/06/2021 16:38

I will need to get paid help really. It’ll clear out the savings a bit but long term will allow me to go back to work and be fully functional again so I’m happy to go ahead. I might be lucky, my mother was 10 years older than me and was gardening within the week with hers. Keyhole , ovaries and cervix left . Just the bit that bleeds coming out. I’ll have a nanny and cleaner in for two solid weeks. Hopefully I’ll be able to hobble about after that and get by. Keeping an open mind though, if I need more help I do . New house has a gorgeous garden so I’m sorta planning on laying on a lounger with a book for the first time in my adult life for a couple weeks ( teenage mum been busy forever!) really hope to be fit for back to uni in October too. I’m sorry you’re suffering too! Have you had to try all the other crap they make you do? The coil and pills etc?

OP posts:
Dishwashersaurous · 15/06/2021 16:46

Op i just want to say that I'm six weeks post operation and private as well and undoubtedly the single best thing that I have ever done.

Its mind blowing to not permanently be in pain and I have more energy than I ever thought possible.

I felt very sleepy and achy for a few days. Then about three weeks of resting when kids at school but cooking dinner, doing laundry no problem etc.

Now back at work and basically feel fine, just occasionally twinge if lift something and I haven't done any proper exercise yet.

But compared to the normal monthly pain and life its a breeze.

I haven't taken any painkillers even paracetamol for a month.

Ps youngest child is same age.

BlueyIsMyBae · 15/06/2021 16:49

Hi op. It will be depend how they do your op. I had once last year due to cancer diagnosis and it was keyhole. Took a while for the gas bloating to go down but recovery was fairly quick and easy, back at work after 4 weeks, not much need for painkillers. Just took it really easy and got a cleaner in. Best of luck.

Nats1984 · 15/06/2021 16:50

Thanks for the tip bridezilla , in all honesty son comes from giant stock and wears age 7 clothes and weight 4.7 stones. With slipped discs I haven’t attempted to lift him for quite a while anyway Grin Sex will be a struggle . We lasted exactly 12 days after Ds was born . Soon as the bleeding stopped I couldn’t wait. Perhaps I’ll send DP away for a few weeks for safety Grin I’m kidding , this is gonna cost a lot of money so I want good results and not to risk a poor outcome by not recovering right . DD 19 will no doubt pop over between shifts to make herself useful .

OP posts:
Dishwashersaurous · 15/06/2021 16:54

Oh I assumed that you were single with the nanny and cleaner talk. If you've got a partner he will easily be able to pick up the slack for a couple of weeks.

And you'll be too sleepy for other fun for a while!

AuntyMabelandPippin · 15/06/2021 16:54

I had a keyhole hysterectomy, they took everything out.

I was absolutely fine a week later, though obviously I wasn't lifting stuff or doing tons of housework.

Fingers crossed you're the same.

Menora · 15/06/2021 16:55

I had one 3 weeks ago
I was at the end of the line with all other options

When I woke up he had done an abdominal hysterectomy, he had hoped laparoscopic/ vaginal but not possible.

This was a blow as I think you recover faster from a vaginal op.

Going to the toilet… I had 2 natural births (one very long and vag stitches) and this was WAY worse. It was even painful and v slow to wee for nearly 2 weeks. Constipation was horrendous. You will need a lot of time to sit on the toilet and a lot of toilet trips. You will need plenty of pillows and to learn to sleep on your back as you can’t roll over in bed. You will need to rethink even small things like picking things up off the floor, carrying things or even folding washing.

It’s a nice idea sitting on a sun lounger 😂 but you need to be able to get back up off of it… it’s not easy! Also like me you may have to wear thick tight surgical compression stockings for 4 weeks in 30 degree heat

I can now get up from sitting and lying down with less pain. I can get trousers on and shower standing up straight. The wound is healed mostly apart from a big lump at one end. The skin around my belly button area is painful and I don’t know why! I am so tired

It is not just like a c section, you need to not tear or damage your new vaginal cuff if you have your cervix out.

The never bleeding again is worth it

I would say 6 months to be back at your ‘normal’ self but 3 weeks I felt so so much better and more mobile

Good luck

Menora · 15/06/2021 16:57

Do not have sex 🥴
You will have so many internal stitches it would not be worth damaging yourself and having a repair op?!

brambee · 15/06/2021 17:00

I had a vaginal hysterectomy at 35 due to prolapse- this was done in Australia as I was living there at the time. Ovaries left in.
It is not something I wanted to have done (you should always think seriously about any major operation), but it was the right decision. My recovery sounds much like diswashersaurous. I had a 5 and 7 year old at the time, plus a husband who worked long hours.
I was back in pilates classes and work 5 weeks after surgery. I think it being through the vagina made it a quicker recovery as my abdominal wall was left intact.
I had been a life long sufferer of awful period pain. Nothing like as bad as the OP. The relief of no monthly pain was joyous. I got so much of my life back.
By two months I was completely normal. Never looked back. Good luck.

Nats1984 · 15/06/2021 17:02

@Dishwashersaurous

Oh I assumed that you were single with the nanny and cleaner talk. If you've got a partner he will easily be able to pick up the slack for a couple of weeks.

And you'll be too sleepy for other fun for a while!

I’m single 7am-7pm 5 days a week. He can’t really take time off and can’t really afford it. He’s gorgeous and lovely but he’s very much a caveman type and I think I’d prefer women around me if that makes sense? He’s fab with ds too so any night dramas he gets up for . I’m loving all these positive stories. I think it’ll be manageable and I’ll have to buy a bottle of bubbly Friday if she books me in
OP posts:
MeanderingGently · 15/06/2021 17:02

I had a hysterectomy when I was aged 34. It was bloody marvellous, the best operation I have every had. Up until then every month was terrible agony, flooding and all sorts.

Different people react differently to the hysterectomy operation. As you are young and (I presume) fit, you'll be physically OK. I was 'chunky', not slim but not overweight, never caused me any problems.

On the same ward as me were a number of much older ladies, they found the hysterectomy harder to deal with, but some saw it as "taking away their womanhood" and so it was more upsetting for them anyway. I just saw it as complete relief and total freedom!

The operation can be done keyhole but mine was a proper large cut and take-everything-out-operation. I always react to anaesthetic so I felt very sick and sleepy when I came round and really just threw up and slept, alternately, for 24 hours. For that reason I had a catheter in too, I hated that.

The op is about 1.5 hours, I believe, although it may be quicker these days. I was all sewn up, the scar looked HUGE but over time it really does shrink down and you can hardly see it these days. The hospital explained to us (TMI warning) that when the surgeon is looking for the uterus they need to "wade through" (their words!) the bowels, and so the bowels are bruised afterwards. That makes it difficult to poo for a few days, I just ate very soft stuff that would move through easily and it wasn't a problem.

I had 'sharp' pain from the incision but it wasn't half as bad as the period pains I used to have and so I found I didn't need the painkillers after a few days at all. I also had a dull pain deep inside, it felt more as though it was in my lower back, but that was the site of the operation. It was bearable, took a couple of weeks to go. They take the stiches out before you go home from hospital.

You feel quite weak afterwards when you go home. The muscles had been cut which 'hold' you (assuming you don't have keyhole surgery) so it's surprisingly difficult to pick things up, like the kettle, or to push a chair under the table etc. I couldn't drive for about 6 weeks - that's what they told me - but actually I drive an automatic and found I could manage after about 4 weeks. It was hard to walk at first, I borrowed a walking stick, I needed it for the first few weeks and wondered whether I'd every run again, but of course I did. As soon as I healed I could climb ladders, run races, lift heavy loads....all no problem.

They like you to try walking as soon as possible, I found it too painful for the first few days, everyone else was shuffling around. But by the time I went back for my 6 week check I was pretty well back to normal and the others, whom I recognised, weren't doing so well.

For those who say it takes 6 months to recover from, I would dispute that in my case. 6 weeks, yes, 6 months, no way. But it may be different for other people. I am a great believer in listening to your body, it will tell you what you can do or can't; follow it and you will recover better.

Personally, I still think it was a great operation, I managed to get mine on the NHS but I would have paid if I could, and I would do it all over again in hindsight.

Menora · 15/06/2021 17:02

To ask at the consultation you need them to be honest with you about whether they can get it out vaginally. Mine (NHS) did not examine me until I was under GA. so waking up I was shocked. There is always this risk though but if the womb is too large or tilted they won’t be able to take it out the vag.

lucky the anaesthetist gave me an epidural just in case. (This was better than having a lot of morphine which just makes me throw up)

I still look 5 months pregnant too which is annoying.

StiggyZardust · 15/06/2021 17:10

I have a laproscopic/vaginal hysterectomy 7 years ago. I was 52 and had everything removed. I didn't have be seen by a private surgeon, but it did take a year to find someone who was willing to do the surgery.
It was the best thing I've ever done, I was having ridiculously heavy periods and was breathless due to severe anaemia.
Recovery was fine, felt a bit sore and tired for a week, but nothing unmanageable. Make sure you have a supply of laxatives! Good luck.

Menora · 15/06/2021 17:12

Agree with getting up and mobile, this is made harder by morphine (sick itchy and dizzy) for me so I stopped them giving it to me and I was up within 24 hours and had a very pathetic shower half bent over but felt like a victory. I didn’t lie in bed all day, even in hospital I got up and got dressed (with assistance) and sat in a chair not the bed but went back for naps. I’ve got up every morning since and had a shower and got dressed too and kept busy, they want to avoid DVT so you need to keep mobile. I have found pulling the stockings on hard so my DD helps me

I can’t drive for 6 weeks as my car insurance won’t allow it (I checked)

I’ve been working too from home although signed off sick, keeping busy is good but don’t be tempted to overdo it, you will pay for it later on that night or next day!

Standrewsschool · 15/06/2021 17:15

I had keyhole surgery takes years ago wher they took everything out.

The first week I took it very easy, partly due to the anaesthetic which always makes me larthargic. Dp and teens did cooking etc Second week, had my dm up, to help cook meals etc. Third week, I felt a lot better, and ended up cooking. My dm actually said it was nice that someone cooked for her! Went back to work after six weeks.

Hysterectomies today are not like they were in the past if you have keyhole surgery. You’ll feel pretty normal pretty soon, apart from avoiding lifting heavy objects. I managed to get out of the hoovering for months afterwards!

Be prepared for the painful wind though!

Welliesandpyjamas · 15/06/2021 17:19

Do you mind me asking how much it will cost privately, OP?
I am on the waiting list but will be lucky if I'm done in the next year and I am really struggling.

MissyB1 · 15/06/2021 17:21

Rennie deflatine for the wind pain (there will be lots of trapped wind). And Dulcoease to prevent constipation. You will be bloated for a few weeks that’s normal.

I had keyhole surgery, everything out. The first 10 days were miserable I’m not going to lie. But I’m 3 weeks post op today and feel so much better! I drove the car a short distance today and was fine.

Dh is desperate to try sex but I’m not ready.

Menora · 15/06/2021 17:26

@MissyB1
I think it’s safer to abstain. The internal stitches take longer to heal and you can end up with infection or granulomas or tears it’s not worth it. Everything I’ve read says to be careful of the vaginal cuff tearing and my consultant said I wasn’t even allowed a bath. I don’t think I could face it my stomach is still too sore anyway!

Nats1984 · 15/06/2021 17:27

@Welliesandpyjamas

Do you mind me asking how much it will cost privately, OP? I am on the waiting list but will be lucky if I'm done in the next year and I am really struggling.
I’m expecting to pay about £8k all in. It’s not easily affordable to me , certainly forgoing other things to afford it but I’m very confident in my decision .
OP posts:
Nats1984 · 15/06/2021 17:31

@Standrewsschool

I had keyhole surgery takes years ago wher they took everything out.

The first week I took it very easy, partly due to the anaesthetic which always makes me larthargic. Dp and teens did cooking etc Second week, had my dm up, to help cook meals etc. Third week, I felt a lot better, and ended up cooking. My dm actually said it was nice that someone cooked for her! Went back to work after six weeks.

Hysterectomies today are not like they were in the past if you have keyhole surgery. You’ll feel pretty normal pretty soon, apart from avoiding lifting heavy objects. I managed to get out of the hoovering for months afterwards!

Be prepared for the painful wind though!

This sounds really similar to my c section. Definitely started to feel like me by the third week. I could handle that quite easily. I went to the pub for lunch when DS was 4 days old with family. I think I cried because my nice boots didn’t fit ( swollen legs a bit still ) but wore jeans and felt quite alright really. I’ve been on heavy opioid pain killers a lot over the years because of my back so I could write books on sleepy bowels and how to manage them! I think I’ve a drawer dedicated to medicine just for gut issues Smile
OP posts:
nicknamehelp · 15/06/2021 17:32

Had mine privately earlier this year. Will be in at least 1 night. I didn't drive for 6 weeks so will need to plan around that. You will need help for at least 2 weeks I could hardly do anything not just because of pain but I was so tired slightest thing wore me out.

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