To inject excitement into my 30something life.

[daylightforever]

Ok, this is shamelessly inspired by another thread but I realised mumsnet may be able to help me!

Im 34, spent most of my 20s and 30s in one very long serious relationship and then a shorter equally disastrous one. And have emerged having completely lost myself.

I used to be fun loving and happy in my own company and now I’m sad a lot of the time and feel like I wasted the best years of my life staying in, not having fun on someone completely unsuitable.

Ive recently got a dog and would love to build up my confidence doing new exciting things. I think I’ve always been quite boring to be honest and I regret not going out more when I was younger. I seem to have suddenly grown up and now have a lot less patience or tolerance which is sometimes good but I’m definitely a lot more spikey now and have lost a lot of my carefree joy which does sadden me.

More than anything, I think I’ve just got far too used to doing things with a partner and I would love to try and build up my own life again and the confidence and freedom to enjoy doing things alone.

Please hit me with any suggestions and if they’re dog friendly even better! Thank you!

Hopeful bump

dog agility classes are fun?

Don’t have much advice but wanted to bump! And good for you.

I am quite lazy when it comes to socialising so my advice would be to say yes to anything that comes your way!

What kind of stuff are you interested in?

Ive always been into fitness and moved to a new area where I know nobody. I joined a crossfit gym because it combines fitness and is quite social.

I second the dog agility, fly ball, sniffer dog training. Are you sporty and into the outdoors? If you are, what about Canicross?
I do empathise, I became single at 37 after a 10 year relationship, and there were a few wilderness years, but I met my now partner a few months after I turned 40. In the last few years I have developed a passion for road cycling and have joined a ladies cycling club, making several really lovely friends and I've also developed a love of strength training in the gym - so good for the mind and the body!
My 40's were much better than my 30s and hopefully I'll continue to go from strength to strength after turning 50 in the autumn!
Onwards and upwards. Good luck.

Good for you OP!
I second the previous posters advice about strength training - if you can afford a handful of personal trainer lessons, get yourself to a gym, learn how to lift, and you will feel amazing. Strong, confident, capable. And you don't have to bulk up - just do it for the endorphins and sense of feeling strong and it will carry over into other areas of your life.

Also, do you like dancing? Not dog friendly obviously, but maybe join a dance class of some kind- a great way to tap into joy, get out of your head and into your body.

I spent a large chunk of my 20s travelling and working abroad, often alone. Travelling alone is wonderful for that feeling of adventure and freedom. I know you have a dog and there's covid, but maybe you could take yourself on some treat weekends away in the UK, just you and the dog! Go explore and get used to having time to yourself and enjoying whatever you want, whenever you want it.

Maybe an art class, or a pottery class, or a drama class. Something really new and different?

But yes, what sort of things are you into? Do you know?

Pole dancing. Find a friendly, inclusive studio and be brave. It’s incredible for fitness and self esteem, it’s fun and I’ve made some amazing friends doing it. I’m 41 and never thought I would do something like that but I’m hooked.