AIBU to love looking in people’s windows!

[LittleRa]

I’m on maternity leave and my baby loves the pram (was a surprise as older DD hated it!) and naps well it, but wakes up when I stop walking. I also do the school run twice a day for older DD. So I find myself wandering around the streets, exploring parts of the neighbourhood I haven’t been to before. I love looking into people’s front windows! It feels so nosy What they have on their walls; art work, photos etc, how their furniture is arranged, where their TV is positioned (and how big it is!) have all become a source of fascination to me. Has my baby brain turned to mush and I need to get out (of the nearby streets) more? Is is terribly bad manners? Anyone else like a good nose into front windows?
Disclaimer- from the street! Not entering gardens/yards and pressing my nose up against the glass! And also not stopping and gawping- always moving along (aforementioned sleeping baby!)

@Myxisaprat

I have vertical blinds and if you’re on the pavement you can kind of still see through them. I just went out and checked.

So I’m going to close them all the time and live in semi darkness because Nosy rude people look in.

How is it my fault that someone can’t just walk past looking where they’re going?

If the same person was walking past often and staring in I think I’d talk to our community police officer.

I’m sorry you’re feeling anxious but what on earth do you think the police/community support officer would say/could do if you told them people are glancing into windows as they walk past?! They can’t police where people’s gaze lies!

I live rurally and my neighbours would need binoculars to look into my house.. but this thread makes me wonder if I need to close the blinds more often people are nosey fuckers.

I think it’s rather rude personally, I wouldn’t dream of doing it. I always pick my DC up when they do it and comment on what someone is watching on TV. Maybe just the way I was raised.

@Mabelface

I put privacy film on my front and back windows to stop people like you doing this. I'm a very private person and my home is my sanctuary.

I understand you doing that. I love to visit London but whenever I see houses with the privacy film I always think the people living there must feel claustrophobic and miss looking outside. Or can you still see out?

Could you get one of those cycling helmets with the camera on the top?

Then you can leisurely glance around on your walk but when you get home you can view the recordings, pause them, zoom in etc.

That's what I do.

If it’s the same person staring in multiple times a day I’d speak to the police and ask if they could suggest anything more I could do and also ask them to check the person wasn’t involved with my stalker.

@TwoLeftSocksWithHoles

Could you get one of those cycling helmets with the camera on the top?

Then you can leisurely glance around on your walk but when you get home you can view the recordings, pause them, zoom in etc.

That's what I do.

I especially love those London streets where you look down into the 'area' window - what used to be the servants' area but is now usually a self-contained living area.

I don’t understand what’s funny about this.

I know I’m anxious but I was also brought up to believe it was at the very least incredibly rude.

It’s not as if my windows are uncovered inviting people to stare.

I love to do this, as you say, especially at Christmas it makes me feel really cosy. I love just seeing what others are up to

I’m actually amazed so many assume people are walking past houses with their necks cranked firmly to the left or right to purposely stare in through closed nets/half-turned blinds.

If (like me!) you live in a standard terraced with a tiny front or no front on a busy pavement, and your blinds or curtains aren’t shut: WE CAN SEE IN. We can see glimpses of your walls as we are approaching from next house or two down, and we can see in as we walk past via the edge of our peripheral vision (or just walking like a normal person). To not see any bit of your front room we would have to fix our gaze firmly on the ground in front of us or be glued to our phone and, to be quite honest, I like to be aware of my surroundings so no.

I love looking in people's windows, especially at Christmas - if you don't like it then live somewhere where people can't do it or put up something to stop it being possible. There's no law about where you can and can't look when you're out for a walk!

I once rented a house abroad . The house was part of a big broken period building in a fairly downtrodden area with a lot of history. There was a local neighbourhood system where each Sunday morning a group would gather for brunch at one of the houses and have a proper nosy round each other’s properties together pretending to look for ‘historic features’. It was bizarrely brilliant. And quite competitive. You got to go in maybe, 15 houses each Sunday morning . The brunches we’re fabulous and the styling of some of the homes was out of this world in a quite bohemian arty way. You’d get to see in bedrooms, bathrooms, gardens… so much fun until your turn to reciprocate!

@evtheria

I’m actually amazed so many assume people are walking past houses with their necks cranked firmly to the left or right to purposely stare in through closed nets/half-turned blinds.

If (like me!) you live in a standard terraced with a tiny front or no front on a busy pavement, and your blinds or curtains aren’t shut: WE CAN SEE IN. We can see glimpses of your walls as we are approaching from next house or two down, and we can see in as we walk past via the edge of our peripheral vision (or just walking like a normal person). To not see any bit of your front room we would have to fix our gaze firmly on the ground in front of us or be glued to our phone and, to be quite honest, I like to be aware of my surroundings so no.

Definitely- I really don’t have to try that hard to see in as I pass!

We get a fair few people glancing in which doesn't bother me, but if I notice anyone really staring my response is to smile and wave. Every time I've done this they have looked guilty or surprised and then moved on quickly - problem solved with no aggro.

I love it. And I don’t care if people look into mine (always lived in the city). Top deck of the bus, on the train, out walking with baby. Get some great ideas! I always say to baby, look at this or look at that when passing different houses.

I didn’t realise you see so much, until I had laser eye surgery. I just thought the inside of houses was “far away” and nobody can see. It’s been so enjoyable! I love being on holiday & seeing homes in other cities, too.

What I’ve noticed is that the really posh estate near me, where I walk with baby, nobody has net curtains. They want to show off to the neighbours, I’m pretty sure! They always have work-men is doing jobs on their houses, keep up with the Jones’s.

By contrast, earthier areas (yes, I mean council estates) always have net curtains. Not sure I’m allowed say that... But the houses may not be as nice inside. MC three bedroom ordinary houses usually have blinds, and boring furnishings. And people carriers parked outside.

My favourites to look into are large Georgian houses. Especially at Christmas! I live in an apartment & the neighbours across can see directly into our place. Doesn’t bother me a bit. I used to live across from a hotel, the things I used to see!

@evtheria

I’m actually amazed so many assume people are walking past houses with their necks cranked firmly to the left or right to purposely stare in through closed nets/half-turned blinds.

If (like me!) you live in a standard terraced with a tiny front or no front on a busy pavement, and your blinds or curtains aren’t shut: WE CAN SEE IN. We can see glimpses of your walls as we are approaching from next house or two down, and we can see in as we walk past via the edge of our peripheral vision (or just walking like a normal person). To not see any bit of your front room we would have to fix our gaze firmly on the ground in front of us or be glued to our phone and, to be quite honest, I like to be aware of my surroundings so no.

Pretty much this. Unless you're wearing blinkers or walking along staring at your phone, it's impossible not to see into people's rooms as they form part of the general visual landscape on a lot of streets.

You don't have to turn your head and have a full on staring contest with the window to see there's a cute cat on the windowsill or someone has a nice mirror above a fireplace or someone is watching Pointless.

Human vision has an arc of approximately 120-130 degrees, which covers quite a large sweep in front of you and to the side!

Well since mine is an ex council I must get nets. Never knew I was living in an earthy area. How condescending.

@Myxisaprat

Well since mine is an ex council I must get nets. Never knew I was living in an earthy area. How condescending.

Mine is ex-council too 🤷‍♀️ Not bothered. You don’t have to be offended about everything.

And you don’t have to look into peoples houses if you have manners 🤷🏼‍♀️

That's what instagram is for.

There is a big difference between a glance when passing (quite natural when for example colour catches your eye) and staring so much so you know what art wall people have. Also a reason why I have blinds on

@FiveShelties

Me too, drives me mad when people draw their curtains and I cannot see.

The reason I have blinds closed all the time. Plus, house is on a hill and people can see in from the higher side due to the design of the windows so when I do open the slats a bit I never open that side.

I can't bear being stared at in my own home. Or having potential burglars peering in.

I never close blinds in the back though because that's a fair play with neighbours 😂 they can stare into mine and I can stare into theirs😂

I’ve noticed a lot of people have the same artwork up around here- it’s a coastal area and lots of people have the same prints of the coast at our area, or of the distinctive lighthouse. People think their decor is original and unique I remember when BIL was house-hunting few years ago, he said every house had a print by Pete McKee (a popular local Sheffield artist, where he was house hunting) and the Wire DVD box set on the shelf Its interesting spotting trends and fashions.

@evtheria

I’m actually amazed so many assume people are walking past houses with their necks cranked firmly to the left or right to purposely stare in through closed nets/half-turned blinds.

If (like me!) you live in a standard terraced with a tiny front or no front on a busy pavement, and your blinds or curtains aren’t shut: WE CAN SEE IN. We can see glimpses of your walls as we are approaching from next house or two down, and we can see in as we walk past via the edge of our peripheral vision (or just walking like a normal person). To not see any bit of your front room we would have to fix our gaze firmly on the ground in front of us or be glued to our phone and, to be quite honest, I like to be aware of my surroundings so no.

Honestly, this makes you sound like you have eyes fixed to the side of your head, like a flat fish. You really don't have to walk with your eyes on the footpath or 'glued to your phone' as the only way of not gawking in people's windows, and as danger is highly unlikely to lunge out and grab you from a window you're passing, I think the need to be 'aware of my surroundings' as an excuse for nosyness is more than a bit disingenuous.