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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wedding hair make up trial awful... help!!

51 replies

headinhands2021 · 13/06/2021 23:19

AIBU to send a really negative email to my wedding hair and make up lady?
And - please help me draft it!

I know today was hot but the finished make up was shiny immediately and foundation had pooled in my pores - she said this is where I have dry patches but I actually think my skin is generally ok and I have been having facials to get ready for wedding so I think maybe the product just didn't suit me. Her technique when applying products under my eyes felt literally like she was jabbing me and I can't let her loose on my mum who is also having her hair and make up done on the wedding day. (Mum is elderly and I think k she may literally cry...!) It hurt so much that my eyes were watering and her way of getting them to stop was to poke some of the skin where apparently my tear duct is, as that would make them stop (it didn't work!)
Lots more I could say but the nail in the coffin for me is that the eyeliner flick was in totally the wrong place on both eyes. I kind of feel like eyeliner is one of the things that make up artists should be good at?! And one of the reasons I want my make up done on the day.
Final note - she is not cheap!

Help - AIBU?
YABU = being fussy, get over it.
YANBU = need to give some frank feedback or find a new MUA. Mumsnetters are great at drafting responses so any help appreciated!

Thanks!

OP posts:
PixieDust28 · 14/06/2021 08:21

You're not being fussy.

If you didn't like the trial. Imagine going ahead and feeling like this on your wedding day!

It isn't worth it. Do you have any big boots near you or any MAC shops?

They have MUA's in there. Go round to a few, see what you like and snap them up there and then.

LondonJax · 14/06/2021 08:34

I had the same thing with two make up trials when I was getting married. In the end I went into my local Boots, sat down with the woman at the Clarins counter, she taught me what I didn't know (more around the foundation side of things as I was perfectly fine with my eyes having done them for 30 years). I bought the items she'd used as I liked the look and then did it myself on the day with a couple of practice sessions beforehand. My make up lasted all day and I think it looks much more 'me' as it's colours I would normally wear.

Both my make up trials had me looking like something out of Love Island - but without the body...

AngelDelightUk · 14/06/2021 08:44

I did my own after seeing some pretty awful results. You can do this! And what you save can go towards other bits and pieces.

Do cancel her soon though or she may charge you

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 14/06/2021 08:50

At least if you go to somewhere like Lancôme you can buy decent makeup and have it to keep after

Saisong · 14/06/2021 08:57

I hated my trial - I actually came home and cried! I'm not a big makeup person, so I wanted professional advice on things I would never even think about. Instead the beautician just asked me questions about my usual look - and then basically did that. I pretty much could have done it myself with a bit of time. There was no suggestions, no exploration of other colours etc. It was so disappointing because I felt like if there was one time to be made up well target than my amateur attempts it was on my wedding day!

Anyway I rang them up and just said I didn't feel it was right for me. Then found someone from Facebook who came to my house and tried all sorts of colours and looks to find something that worked. I was so relieved - and she was very reasonably priced too.

kidneynewname · 14/06/2021 09:00

Agree with the masses, don't try and fix it, this is obviously her technique so a polite decline to love forwards is the way.

How close is the wedding?

Original poster
headinhands2021 · 14/06/2021 09:18

@ChrissyPlummer

Ask on FB, there are loads of people asking this all the time on mine and my town has loads of beauticians/hairdressers. When my friend got married, she went into MAC, had a makeover, liked it and tapped up the girl who did it and just paid her to do the whole bridal party. Would something like that be an option? I appreciate it’s harder now with COVID.

Whereabouts are you?

This is such a good idea! Thank you
OP posts:
Original poster
headinhands2021 · 14/06/2021 09:18

@MsHedgehog

Where are you based? For recommendations!
North London x
OP posts:
Original poster
headinhands2021 · 14/06/2021 09:19

@WhatAWasteOfOranges

If anywhere near london/ Surrey really recommend Eloise Parker. She’s fantastic...lots of work on her Instagram. She’s never hurt me!
Thank you!!
OP posts:
Original poster
headinhands2021 · 14/06/2021 09:19

@LondonJax

I had the same thing with two make up trials when I was getting married. In the end I went into my local Boots, sat down with the woman at the Clarins counter, she taught me what I didn't know (more around the foundation side of things as I was perfectly fine with my eyes having done them for 30 years). I bought the items she'd used as I liked the look and then did it myself on the day with a couple of practice sessions beforehand. My make up lasted all day and I think it looks much more 'me' as it's colours I would normally wear.

Both my make up trials had me looking like something out of Love Island - but without the body...

Lol - this was me yesterday!! My hubby saw me and sort of gulped Grin
OP posts:
Original poster
headinhands2021 · 14/06/2021 09:20

@AngelDelightUk

I did my own after seeing some pretty awful results. You can do this! And what you save can go towards other bits and pieces.

Do cancel her soon though or she may charge you

Thank you x x
OP posts:
Original poster
headinhands2021 · 14/06/2021 09:20

@Saisong

I hated my trial - I actually came home and cried! I'm not a big makeup person, so I wanted professional advice on things I would never even think about. Instead the beautician just asked me questions about my usual look - and then basically did that. I pretty much could have done it myself with a bit of time. There was no suggestions, no exploration of other colours etc. It was so disappointing because I felt like if there was one time to be made up well target than my amateur attempts it was on my wedding day!

Anyway I rang them up and just said I didn't feel it was right for me. Then found someone from Facebook who came to my house and tried all sorts of colours and looks to find something that worked. I was so relieved - and she was very reasonably priced too.

So sorry to hear this, but glad it's not just me. Thank you all for your supportive replies x
OP posts:
PermanentTemporary · 14/06/2021 09:22

If you normally like the way you do your own makeup, do it yourself. I think people often look a bit odd after professional makeup, not really themselves.

AdelindSchade · 14/06/2021 09:27

This happened to me. I went home from the trial and dh said 'who are you and what have you done with my finace?'. I got another MUA wh understood that I wanted a more natural look.

reader12 · 14/06/2021 09:27

I went to the Mac counter in selfridges & got a nice lady to show me how to do everything and bought the stuff she recommended & did it myself. I don’t normally wear lots of makeup so felt much more like myself than if someone else had done it on the day. It’s quite an intense busy morning on your wedding day and I think having a makeup lady there and wondering if she was going to turn up etc would have just been stressful.

For my sisters wedding we had a hairdresser come round all blow dry all our hair which was lovely, I think that’s much harder to do well yourselves than makeup. Maybe have a look at beauty and the boutique only too, they have lots of natural-looking stuff that’s very easy to apply.

Littlefluffyclouds13 · 14/06/2021 09:33

@AdelindSchade

This happened to me. I went home from the trial and dh said 'who are you and what have you done with my finace?'. I got another MUA wh understood that I wanted a more natural look.
I agree! My friends who had make up artists, looked weird! Just really odd and clearly made up by someone else if that makes sense? Far better to invest in some really lovely brands and do it yourself.
80sMum · 14/06/2021 09:40

Maybe just do your own makeup? You know yourself best and know what looks right on you. Just be yourself.

Whereisthechicken · 14/06/2021 09:41

I work in the wedding industry so I'm part of many wedding supplier groups. If you PM me your wedding date I could send over a list of MUAs who are available by this evening? That should make your search for a new one easier.

Also, ignore the magazine features that attracted you to your mua in the first place - I'm guessing they were styled shoots. Work from a styled shoot is not a real representation of the suppliers work and shouldn't be treated as such. You need to ask all potential wedding suppliers to see their real work from real weddings - not styled photo shoots.

MsHedgehog · 14/06/2021 09:43

I was north London too! I’ll PM my shortlist for when I got married!

HyggeTygge · 14/06/2021 09:44

@PermanentTemporary

If you normally like the way you do your own makeup, do it yourself. I think people often look a bit odd after professional makeup, not really themselves.
I agree, you probably know your skin and face better. I did a make up trial before my wedding, it was ok i guess, but not better than what I could do, so I did my own and don't regret it!
Littlefluffyclouds13 · 14/06/2021 10:08

@80sMum

Maybe just do your own makeup? You know yourself best and know what looks right on you. Just be yourself.
This is so true. Dh & I had attended many weddings before we got married and although dh would never tell me how to dress or look, he did say he'd love me to look like 'me' when we married and said so many of his friends wives were almost unrecognisable on their wedding day Grin
Footloosefancyfree · 14/06/2021 10:12

That's what trials are for. I booked with one lady and when I enquired about my trial denied all knowledge of the booking despite messages sent, I later heard bad reviews. I went with someone more professional.

Overdueanamechange · 14/06/2021 10:12

My local lovely Estee Lauder counter consultant did mine for me in the shop! I used to always buy my projects from her, so it wasn't a piss take. Whoever you go with insist on them using your foundation and face creams, you don't want a reaction to something that doesn't suit you.

Lesssaideasymended · 14/06/2021 10:50

Try elsewhere, makeup is subjective, you’ll find the makeup artist that works for you ❤️

Also now that you know what you definitely don’t like, you can use it to give instruction to a new makeup artist. Create a board on Pinterest of looks that you like so you can show them.

That said, makeup application should never hurt 🙈 people always say that when I apply makeup it makes them feel relaxed and sleepy. Don’t be afraid to say if it hurts, I always check on the comfort of my clients throughout.

(Professional makeup artist for over 14 years)

notalwaysalondoner · 14/06/2021 11:55

Just say no to her, it would be better to do your own make up than hate it on the day. Many normal hairdressers do good up dos and proms etc so are perfectly capable of doing wedding hair too. In the end my sister did my make up and my hair was done in the salon down the road and I don’t think anyone would have known the make up wasn’t professional, even though it was a boiling hot day, I certainly felt great and the photos look great. Do you have a friend or family member who is good at make up and might already have some higher quality products they’ll use on you on the day if you don’t already have some?