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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be really cross about this feedback I’ve received at work today?

122 replies

BiscoffAddict · 11/06/2021 19:35

I’m a teaching assistant and am working on supply via an agency at the moment. It’s obviously been a tough year but most schools are just glad of the help. This week I’ve been working everyday at an Infant school. They seemed lovely, I was only supposed to be there four days but they asked me to do an extra day. Of course I was happy to help. Today as I left the teacher thanked me profusely and said she hoped she’d see me again soon.

I then get home to a message from the agency asking me to ring them and it turns out that the school had some ‘concerns’ about me. Apparently there had been ‘incident’, which I have no recollection of where I told a child with additional needs to stop dancing during circle time. They also accused me of using my phone whilst in the classroom, which I couldn’t have done because my phone was in my bag in the cupboard!

I was and still am absolutely gobsmacked! They were so nice to my face, and I came away thinking what a lovely week it had been.I just can’t get my head around it. This has never happened before ever, and even my account manager admitted she didn’t understand it because I always get good feedback and no one has ever had a problem with me before.

The whole thing has left me reeling and actually and I’m really fucking fuming! I can’t understand why they didn’t talk to me directly if they were unhappy with my work? I also don’t understand why they kept me for the whole week?

AIBU to be furious about it!

OP posts:
CoffeeRunner · 11/06/2021 20:23

She could potentially have mixed the feedback up still. For example, she has two TAs on her books called Emma.

A message comes to her with some feedback for Emma.

She looks on her records & you're the first Emma she sees who has been booked this week so she assumes it has come from your school. She would be getting the school name etc from her own records rather than the message if that makes sense.

Do you recall an incident with an SN child not keeping still?

Angelica789 · 11/06/2021 20:28

The dancing thing is weird. That would just warrant a quiet word about the circumstances of that child. You can’t always tell immediately which children have SEN or what their SEN means in terms of behaviour and it’s natural to remind a child to sit down if that’s what’s been asked. Sounds like a total over reaction.

Original poster
BiscoffAddict · 11/06/2021 20:29

That’s just it. I can’t remember the incident at all! Apparently it happened earlier in the week.

OP posts:
supermoonrising · 11/06/2021 20:32

Contact the school

DogsSausages · 11/06/2021 20:33

Surely if they felt you were at risk with a child they would have addressed ii at the time not in a feedback to your agency days later, I would ask who reported you to the Head and why this, if any if it actually happened, wasnt addressed.

mcmooberry · 11/06/2021 20:36

I wouldn't let it go. The phone thing is just wrong and the dancing thing - if it happened at all - was such a non-incident that you don't even remember it.

Is it likely to be the teacher of the class who has made this up for reasons known only to herself.

I would ask the agency to take it up for you or write directly to the head of the school.

Very annoying!

Soontobe60 · 11/06/2021 20:36

First of all, if you did tell a child to stop dancing about during circle time, that’s just doing your job.
Regarding the phone, did you use it at break or lunch time?

Original poster
BiscoffAddict · 11/06/2021 20:40

@Soontobe60

First of all, if you did tell a child to stop dancing about during circle time, that’s just doing your job. Regarding the phone, did you use it at break or lunch time?
I used it at lunch. But that was in the staff room! I have an Apple Watch that sometimes beeps with updates, but I’ve got it set to silent. It’s not like I sat in class mindlessly browsing Facebook?
OP posts:
wasgoingmadinthecountry · 11/06/2021 20:40

They are either looking for a free day or this is feedback from an entirely different school and nothing to do with you.

SleepyPartyTime · 11/06/2021 20:43

I would straighten this out. Using your phone wuld make you massively unprofessional and it sounds very clear you didn't. I think either the agency or the school have you confused with someone else. I would call the agency and insist on having it cleared up.

GeorgiaGirl52 · 11/06/2021 20:48

Something similar happened to me. Took a call in the school office from an irate father screaming that his 3rd grade (age 8) daughter had arrived home with no lunch box AND her homework was graded wrong AND the teacher had not let her exchange her library book AND the teacher was a too young and skanky to be a role model. He had met her at parents' night and she wore a skirt so short that when she sat down the skirt didn't even bend.
That remark turned on a light bulb. I asked what school his daughter was in. He said North Avenue. I said I'm sorry but this is North Street School and our 3rd grade teachers are both in their 60's.
He hung up without another word.

Herecomesanothernamechange · 11/06/2021 20:52

@BiscoffAddict

Definitely not a mixup. I was the only supply there!
Have they mixed you up with someone who worked in a previous week?
SleepyPartyTime · 11/06/2021 20:52

Couldn't the agency have your feedback mixed up with someone else's?

Ostara212 · 11/06/2021 20:53

@CoffeeRunner

She could potentially have mixed the feedback up still. For example, she has two TAs on her books called Emma.

A message comes to her with some feedback for Emma.

She looks on her records & you're the first Emma she sees who has been booked this week so she assumes it has come from your school. She would be getting the school name etc from her own records rather than the message if that makes sense.

Do you recall an incident with an SN child not keeping still?

There's this possibility

Given the workload most people are managing, I'd say there are several others, lots of things go completely mad, especially if they log stuff on a portal.

Do you actually know the consultant who gave you the feedback?

HotChocolateLover · 11/06/2021 20:54

Definitely need feedback. Don’t allow this to go on your record so to speak. Not going to hijack your thread but I got some work feedback yesterday that was a blatant fairytale from someone senior to me. Not exactly earth shattering stuff but still infuriating and made me look bad.

3scape · 11/06/2021 21:00

Be very clear with your agency these incidents did not occur. Were you supposed to be there longer? Is the school slipping out of an agreed length of contract with you? Or have found a different agency (I've seen that happen).

Catra · 11/06/2021 21:17

My DH is a teacher and had a lovely, helpful TA in his class on supply for the week. When he found out she wasn't coming back he asked the head what had happened - as far as DH was concerned she had proven herself indispensable. Without even flinching the head admitted he didn't like the woman - no reason, he just didn't like her - so he'd lied to the agency and given her terrible feedback to get rid of her. DH was gobsmacked.

So while the feedback you received isn't true, it doesn't necessarily mean it wasn't meant for you, I'm sorry to say.

AbsolutelyPatsy · 11/06/2021 21:32

no, it could still have been the wrong message, someone wrote the wrong school/wrong person.

AbsolutelyPatsy · 11/06/2021 21:32

i think you should get this retracted

poppycat10 · 11/06/2021 21:40

It's quite obviously a mistake. The agency needs to sort it out.

shouldistop · 11/06/2021 21:43

I'd think they've mixed you up with someone who was there a different day. I'd definitely ask for it to be looked into further.

WorraLiberty · 11/06/2021 21:54

@BiscoffAddict

Also I should add when talking to me she even mentioned the name of the school and the headteacher so it was definitely about me! I don’t think I’ve been confused with someone else.
Email the Head and CC the agency in.

If you're telling the truth then this needs clearing up.

MrMucker · 11/06/2021 21:59

@Catra

My DH is a teacher and had a lovely, helpful TA in his class on supply for the week. When he found out she wasn't coming back he asked the head what had happened - as far as DH was concerned she had proven herself indispensable. Without even flinching the head admitted he didn't like the woman - no reason, he just didn't like her - so he'd lied to the agency and given her terrible feedback to get rid of her. DH was gobsmacked.

So while the feedback you received isn't true, it doesn't necessarily mean it wasn't meant for you, I'm sorry to say.

I completely agree, this can happen. However, the reason for the school lying (or at least the person who deals with the agency) could actually lie with the approach the agency take. Some agencies are way too pushy with schools, they bombard with news of someone they've got, they push for work even when there is none, and when turned down, they can still call the school with the same the next day. Schools are really busy places, and if someone is fed up with fielding agency calls, eg one that continues to push for OP to work there even though they don't actually need them, then they might just say that it is a person they don't want. Just to make the agency go away. In this case, OP, I'd put the blame in the hands of the agency. Lots of second guessing, I know, but I reckon they went overboard on hard sell when they realised the school liked you enough for a fifth day.
SwanShaped · 11/06/2021 22:01

That’s terrible catra

DavidTheDog · 11/06/2021 22:01

Are you going to challenge it?