To hate this stereotype?

[MiaMarshmallows]

When a nanny or housekeeper is employed, people say that I need to be careful of my DP even if she is not attractive. Mostly it is said in a joking sense but having a nanny in my home even on a temporary basis is not going to make my DP leave me and fall in love with her. He and I are incredibly strong and I know he does not see her that way at all.
Aibu to wish people would stop being so immature and ridiculous about this?

I expect people who work as nannies and housekeepers are far more annoyed with that sort of stereotyping, but no, YANBU. If anybody said that to me and I were in your position I think i'd play dumb: "I don't get it. Why do I need to do that? What's the joke? Why would someone do that?" etc.
It's such a ridiculous, internalised misogyny/jealousy thing.

Why would it bother you unless you are worried.

I imagine it's annoying because people are constantly trying to plant seeds of doubt, distrust, and paranoia in OP's head. It would get to you after a while, regardless of how confident you are in your relationship

YANBU. It annoys me because it makes it harder for women who are attractive or young to get those jobs. It’s ridiculous for a qualified childcare professional or housekeeper to be disadvantaged in their job because of how they happen to look.

If my DH was enough of a dick to cheat or have an affair then i really wouldn’t be thinking that the appearance of our nanny or cleaner would be the factor that held our marriage together or not. He’s a grown man and can keep it in his pants however hot the women are he comes across. And if he doesn’t, then fine, he’s shown himself to be the sort of man I don’t want.

It's insulting to the people in the job

First world problems

Why would it bother you unless you are worried.

Because it implies that the husband is a cheat just waiting for an opportunity, that the OP's judgement is flawed, that the nanny they have hired is unprofessional and that the commenter has more inside knowledge about the state of the OP's relationship than she does.
Just off the top of my head.

It is insulting to both your husband and employee. It is based on an assumption that most men can't help but lust after women they have regular contact with. Could you come back with 'Are you suggesting that my husband is capable of sexual harassment?'

How hideously heterosexist. The nanny au pair could be a lesbian and lure you away.

Who is telling you this? I've only see this level of paranoia among British expats in the ME, whose attitude to the maids from the developing world whom they were employing for peanuts was often an unpalatable mixture of paranoia, insecurity and power-crazedness.

Is that you Carrie?

And still I know two cases where the father of the family has left for the nanny. It is a stereotype that is partially true, in my experience. And no, nannies weren't specifically attractive or young (in one of the cases the nanny was 10+ years older than the mother), and the families looked (at least to an outsider) rock solid. My theory is that having daily closeness to a woman in a clearly subservient position + caring about his children may play weird tricks with some men's brains. Not all, obviously.
In one of these cases, by the way, the court awarded the residence to the father exactly because there were two "parental" figures in the new family.

Tbf I’ve heard It happening Quite a bit so if I was to employ a nanny (which I never would anyway) I would definitely choose someone older/less attractive

Averyyounggrandmaofsix

It's never harder for attractive women to get work