Calling your kid stupid

[YummyButter]

SIL went round to visit great uncle today, her DC is 2 weeks old and she wanted to let her great uncle meet DC. SIL happened to mention this visit in the family group chat when I was visiting PIL with my DC.

MIL started complaining that they weren't vaccinated yet etc., and that they shouldn't be visiting anyone. She went on to describe SIL as "careless and stupid" (with a laugh thrown in for good measure). FYI, this isn't the first time I've heard her call her daughter stupid.

Is it just me, or is this just nasty? Never in a million years would I dream of calling my child stupid, especially behind their back. I think I worry that she may speak of my DC this way, and that's why it's bothering me so much? I don't know.

But there’s a difference to calling an adult stupid compared to an actual child

"Kid" suggests a young child rather than an adult daughter. Not as harmful saying it about an adult as a child, but still an unpleasant and hurtful way to talk about your offspring.

It's also an unnecessarily unpleasant way to describe the normal and legal action of visiting your family. Presumably the great-uncle is old enough to be double vaccinated (or young enough not to be high risk) so neither baby nor great-uncle have been put at significant risk by the visit.

But you also said she put a laughing face so don’t know why your taking this so seriously tbh

Oh ignore me. I thought they were referring to the baby as stupid😅😅😅

If it's an adult I wouldn't care.

I think you’re being over sensitive/critical. People are allowed to think other people are stupid and/or do stupid things and voice that even if they share a family tree.

As far as derogatory terms go it’s not particularly offensive. It’s not like she called her a stupid c*nt. (I’ve only censored that because I get the feeling you’re not a swearer).

@Chocolateemergency

There is a difference between saying they are doing something stupid and actually calling them stupid. Did she definitely call her stupid?

Yes