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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Do I take this job?

3 replies

Avasmama6 · 11/06/2021 01:19

So currently I work at a small local supermarket. I work 2 weekday afternoon/evening shifts and one Saturday a week. I have 2 young DC and my DP works full time. I’ve been in my job for five years and stuck at it so long as it allowed me to be at home with my DC for most of the week and be available for school drop offs and most school pick ups. However from day one I really disliked the job. The management have extremely unrealistic standards of their staff, it’s a very stressful environment to work in and I return home from work after most shifts completely worn out and flustered. I am not interested in climbing the ladder to management there as the supervisors are grossly underpaid and massively overworked. I really hate having to work public holidays such as Easter Sunday, Boxing Day, New Year’s Day and weekends, and missing out on quality family time. There have been some good points however, although I have missed lots of time where all the family are together as me and DP mainly work around each other to avoid extortionate child care costs, I do get to have lots of time just me and the kids. I’ve met some really lovely people and made great friends, & it is easy enough to book time off, swap shifts to be there for kids appointments/clubs etc. But on the whole I feel like I am staying in a dead end job that makes me miserable most of the time purely because it fits around my family, I’m not doing it for me and it’s not helping me develop professionally.

So I’ve been on the lookout for jobs for a very long time. But as it’s been years since I’ve had any relevant experience for some of the things I’ve been applying for and due to covid etc, I’ve had no luck. However on a whim last week I applied for a job I came across online, similar line of work which I did pre- kids and loved, had a phone call on Monday, discussed the role, all sounded great, had interview yesterday and have been offered the job today. The start date is in 3 weeks. I have to give 2 weeks notice at my current job so I’ve a week to make a firm decision. I was ecstatic to get the job at first, but after doing some more in depth research into the company I’ve found lots of poor reviews from previous employees and I’m wondering if I’ll be going out of the frying pan and into the fire if I take the job. It is also a full time position, working 10am - 6:30pm Monday to Friday. So I will get my weekends back and I will still be able to drop of DC at school. However my youngest is going to have to go into full time childcare and my eldest into an after school club which will be an additional cost, with that plus income tax I won’t be that much better off financially. What also concerns me is that some of the reviews I’d read online stated that it was near impossible to book time off or to get time off for appointments etc. At the minute my preschooler is having regular appointments with a speech therapist and special needs nurse and I need my work to be flexible with me on that. I’d also read reviews stating that they messed up peoples pay quite often which is also concerning.

However I have waited years for another opportunity to come along and I’m scared I’ll regret it if I don’t give it a go, I’m also worried I’m making a terrible mistake and I’ll end up way more burnt out than I already am if I accept the job, and I will miss being around my kids terribly. Am I too comfortable in a job that isn’t serving my personal and professional needs? Am I making excuses to stay cause I’ve shit the bed and scared to make the leap of faith? Should I let this job pass, keep applying and wait for something better to come up? Or am I ruining my chances of ever getting into the industry I want to work in the longer i stay out of the game waiting for the perfect job to be handed to me on a plate?

YABU - take the job
YANBU - don’t do it!

OP posts:
Rainbowqueeen · 11/06/2021 01:48

I’d start with more research

I’d first consider how many negative reviews there are compared to how many staff there are. Are they recent reviews. Can you tell if the negative reviews are at a specific location ? Is it possible to speak to someone who works there now?

As far as logistics go can your partner cover appointments and sick leave? If you’ve been doing it for years then he should have built up some goodwill and some degree of flexibility. How many more appointments does your DC need?

Just from the information you have provided I would take it but have a one year plan to gain as much experience as you can and to apply for other jobs at the end of that time, earlier if something perfect comes up. If you and DP both have 4 weeks leave you should be able to cover most of the school holidays if you are willing to sacrifice a long holiday together and just do short breaks over bank holiday weekends etc. This will save on costs and you can do some of the appointments during that time.

As far as pay goes, is the pension better? Take that into account.

Good luck with your decision.

FaceyRomford · 11/06/2021 02:04

If you feel the need to ask the question, I would say don't take it.

KarmaStar · 11/06/2021 09:24

I would advise you to trust your instincts.
If this was the job for you there would be no hesitation,but the bad employee reviews and the potentially inflexible hours are causing you concern.
This does not mean that the right job will not come up in the future,when things are meant to be everything just falls into place.
You are stressed coming home,at least that is just three days a week and you have flexibility and very limited,if any,childcare costs,your stress levels might go off the roof of you were unhappy five days a week and you were unable to get your dc to medical appointments and childcare was ££.
Your dc will soon be older and more independent,enjoy this time with them for a little but longer until the right job comes along.
I've a feeling,not long after you've turned down the position you will have a big sigh of relief that you did so.

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