How do I get my 2 year and 9 month old to listen to me and stop running off

[wingingit987]

Not an aibu but I'm in desperate need of advice.

I'm 35 weeks pregnant and my toddler is hard work im sure they all are but mine seems to be very hard at the moment.

We've had issues with him running off for a while now but for me today was hard and I'm not in agony. We went to a soft play kid is like a whippet runs so fast and doesn't stop. He does this a lot when we've been out I find it really hard aswell being so huge we've stopped going out as much.

When the baby comes there's no more push chair only a buggy board so I can no longer strap him in. I've tried everything to stop him running off but he just don't listen.

If he does try to run off what is the best way to discipline him?

He talks quite well but we are on the waiting list for speech and language therapy due to constant drooling he also doesn't pronounce some words very well.

I know it's probably not the case but slot of my friends can let go of there children's hands without them running off. I can't do that as he would run off and wouldn't come back. He wouldn't care if I wasn't in sight either.

I feel like a terrible parent all the time recently

He will have to go on reins for his own safety
It's hard I've been there and it does (eventually) get easier

This is what reins are for. And anyone that gives any judgement about it has never had a bolter.

Buy a set of reins.

There's an awful story on here when a small child slipped his mum's hand and bolted onto a road and was killed. Reins will keep him safe and will reinforce that he can't run off.

A backpack with reins attached, so he can be independent without wandering too fa for running away. If when you’re holding hands you put the ring over your wrist and you can hold hands, if he breaks free then you have the reins as back up. Take no chances, and you are not a bad mum he is just pushing the boundaries and if you can’t rely on him then you need a back up to ensure his safety and to show him you mean it by stopping him from being able to run away if he tries to

I work with toddlers and they can be massively impulsive and don’t always understand consequences they haven’t experienced so ‘you might get run over’ means nothing to a toddler. He needs natural consistent consequences such as going in the buggy or having reins so that he learns what he can and can’t get away with

Oh bless you OP, three under three. I thought I was mad with two under two.

Push chair or reins are the best ways

My children have a similar age gap, and honestly, I tended to use the pushchair for the toddler and a sling for the baby. Or reins. Basically, you can't actually trust a toddler to make sensible decisions about safety, or to control their impulses enough to be consistently and reliably obedient.

I read this really wrong. I thought you had a two year old who runs off and also a 9 month old who runs off. I was thinking ‘wow - mine didn’t even walk at 9 months. This must be a very advanced child’

Backpack reins and a double buggy. I'm glad it's just your 2 year old though. I read the title as your 2 year old and your 9 month old!

I’d sling the newborn for the first few months and keep Usain Bolt strapped in his pushchair.

Reins, and if he runs off when you catch him you go straight home. Every time. No matter what you're doing and how much fun everyone is having. Hopefully he'll catch on fairly quickly

Reins are the answer. He is too little to have developed impulse control.

You can also keep to bigger child in the buggy and have the baby in a sling if it is easier.

I’d sling the newborn for the first few months and keep Usain Bolt strapped in his pushchair.

I'd also say reins!

Can you get a double buggy? Definately reins etc

It’s like you’ve described my DS!
We’re also waiting for speech therapy, mine doesn’t talk much but he understands my firm voice and if I have to raise my voice slightly saying ‘no’ he stops.
We use reins, he likes to have abit independence and freedom but I have control. If we hold hands I still hold the reins in around my hand/wrist.
You’ll be knackered being so pregnant I would advise a double buggy so you can get out and about and not worry.

Reins.

And read how to talkso kids will listen.

As everyone else has said - this is what reins are for.
Plus, before the baby is here, consistent, repeated boundaries and strapped in the pushchair when they aren't ready to listen (a lot at first but the penny drops in the end).

You could also look on freecycle / gum tree / local selling sites / local giving sites for a double buggy for a while. Or ask amongst people you know if anyone has one you can borrow.
I borrowed one when dc2 was born. Found it invaluable. Bought a 2nd hand one for very little money, then gave it away in the ends when dc3 outgrew it.

@Bellbottomstovetop

Oh bless you OP, three under three. I thought I was mad with two under two.

Push chair or reins are the best ways

I read it like that but I think she means a just under 3yo. 2y and 9m

I read this wrong and thought wow how did you get pregnant again so quickly and how is your 9mo running . In all seriousness I used reins

Reins!

Backpack with reins.

Reins for sure. Can’t believe people get judgy about them.

My oldest was never a bolter, my 2nd drove me nuts. He's 5 now and really good at staying close. But my god, it is not something I want to repeat.