I'm really down today, so I'm asking for help to find a better way. I have no family. I had to cut myself off because they were all severely dysfunctional/abusive. I don't have a partner either so this means I spend all my time on my own. I'm usually ok with this but sometimes I get down missing out on having a nice family to interact with. I'm also very-long term unemployed and although I quite like the idea of working now, I have no idea how to start. I need a gentle helping hand to try and start without getting overwhelmed. I'm not sure anyone would want me though as I have no employment history for a cv. I've moved house over 25 times so I feel rootless too and that's not nice.
Going on antidepressants isn't an option for me because when I tried them I felt doubly suicidal, so now I prefer to try and change my life without. I have a couple of friends I see once in a while but not often. I just feel so uncomfortable in the world, like I have no place in it that I feel safe & cozy & welcomed. What can I do? I want to stop feeling what's the point?