To wonder if my postnatal feelings are normal

[Floopyandtired]

Shamelessly posting here for traffic. I gave birth on Wednesday morning to DS2, c section but not traumatic, bf going well and baby generally happy and content. The last day or two I’ve been feeling very weepy and anxious; feeling like a failure as a parent to DS1 and only feeling properly calm when I’m holding or feeding the baby. I had previously been on cloud 9 so this feels like a huge crash down to earth. My 3.5 year old DS now seems like a giant and I feel very protective over the baby. It feels like my world has been turned upside down even though this is everything I’ve ever wanted. I see the midwife tomorrow so will ask her for advice but fear being fobbed off with leaflets so would really appreciate some advice from others who’ve been there. Thank you.

TOTALLY normal. I suffer really badly with ‘baby blues’ and have with all 3 of mine around the same day as you. Please be kind to yourself, acknowledge this is totally normal and should pass quickly. If it doesn’t then please please speak to your midwife/health visitor (I didn’t with dd1 as I/midwife passed it off as normal and suffered with prolonged postnatal depression).

Totally normal! The weepiness is almost certainly hormonal. I felt tearful for weeks after my second c section, very anxious, and felt very vulnerable in a way I find difficult to describe. I also found the shift in terms of how I saw DC1 (from baby to giant overnight) to be tricky as well.

Definitely mention it to your midwife but I wouldn’t worry at this stage, I think most feelings are pretty normal so early on.

And congratulations!

Congrats on DS2! I have been here too and it’s totally normal. Things will settle. Xx

Hi op congratulations on your new baby. Yes this is very very normal and it will pass. It's hormones. Do you have anyone you can chat to?

11 dc here. Totally normal. Feelings quickly faded and luckliy never had pnd..
Despite a so called mate gossiping I did.
Cow bag.

Normal (ish). It is on to feel tearful and anxious as your hormones adjust and the milk comes in. However please do mention it to your midwife so they know to check in with you again. If it doesn't lift then there is lots of help out there. Hope you feel better soon.

Yes totally totally normal.

I would advise avoiding the news and current affairs for the next 6 weeks or so and massively lowering your expectations. Everybody fed, nobody dead, this too shall pass.

Snuggle up at home with the baby, spend some quality time with your toddler playing in the floor (once your tummy has healed a bit), watch lots of nice, gentle Jane Austen-type movies, ideally have people bring you food and tea, and remember that in a very short time your two DSs will be each other’s best friends, fiercest critics, partners in all sorts of mischief, and most deeply loyal defenders all at the same time, and you will love them both even more for the love they bear each other (apart from 50% of the time when you’re refereeing constant off the ball incidents but still).

I felt the exact same when mine were that age. They’re 4 & 7 now and hearing them exploding into giggles in their bedroom as I make their dinner makes my heart fill up to the brim.

Congratulations and go easy on yourself- my eldest spoke with a precise English accent from watching so much Peppa Pig while DD2 was tiny… we are not from England. Didn’t do her any harm!

I felt the same with my first which was a more traumatic birth but not my second. I has loud angry crying because some food was past its sell by date and because I hated myself because I'd considered an abortion, and because I fell over and was obviously a rubbish mum, amongst other things. Not like me at all. I think I felt better again after about 7 - 10 days.

If it goes on any longer than this though the I'd speak to a doctor, but a massive hormone crash and emotional meltdown a few days after the birth is completely normal

Definitely. I think you are day 4 so prime time for baby blues and you should feel better very soon.

Congratulations! X

Thank you everyone for taking the time to reply and be so kind x