Did anyone else feel relief when your child when to nursery and you returned to work?

[cucumberella]

I love my baby more than anything in the world and would do anything for her, but I'm really looking forward to getting back to work and putting some focus back on me. I feel terrible to put her in nursery, but at the same time feel relieved. She is only 11 months but I need this. Did anyone else feel this way?

God yes.

Yes. It didn't last long though. Working with kids in care or school is a hard slog.

Absolutely, I really need some when I am not primarily Mummy!

Yes. I don’t need to work but it makes me feel like a whole person. It’s lonely at home with baby and I like being recognised for contributing to society in other ways. I’ve been back 7 months now and I think ideal would be working 4 days a week but I’ve yet to sort it.

God yes and even more so when they started school and I wasn’t paying for the pleasure of them being outside the home!

Yes, no guilt at all.

You should not feel terrible! We are certain that you are a super-mom to your little one. You deserve time to focus on yourself while you rest assured that she's being taken care of. You got this, super-mom!

Going to the toilet unsupervised was great.

God yes, even more so second time around when I knew the nursery staff and so wasn't worried about her in the slightest. I've been back about two months now and I'm significantly happier.

@PleasantBirthday

Going to the toilet unsupervised was great.

My favourite things include crossing the road at the highest kerb rather than looking for dropped kerbs for the buggy.

Hell yes.

Thank god for the replies! I've been feeling like the worst mother in the world and like an absolute failure for feeling this way

Toilet trips and hot cups of tea (rather than half a cup of lukewarm tea that I hadn't been able to get to)

Oh definitely! After Ds I went back at 9 months and it was bliss, but I felt awful putting DS in nursery. When he was 13onths I increased my hours to get a better balance between home and work.
I'll be going back at 13 months with DD, mainly because I don't want to stop breastfeeding to allow me to go back sooner, but I must admit, I do look forward to it, despite it being 7 months away.
A hot coffee, not having to share my snacks etc are my top highlights!

@cucumberella

Thank god for the replies! I've been feeling like the worst mother in the world and like an absolute failure for feeling this way

Don't worry OP, some smug git privileged enough to not have to rely on two Full time wages coming in will be along in a second to tell you your child will be emotionally scarred forever because of your selfish actions.

Meanwhile, for those of us in the real world, yes it is good to not always have to 'be mum'. But depending on the job and how flexible your employer is, it can end up becoming a different type of hard. I used to go through spells of feeling really guilty about working full time with my first. I worked part time after my second was born and in all honesty, it wasn't any easier or better. I felt like I was just doing a bad job at everything. It's only been now my DC are a bit older and I'm WFH now, I actually feel like I'm not spinning a million plates at once.

So much yes!! I wasn't ready when my DD was 8 months and I went back full time but once I had my DS and nurseries opened again I was so happy to send them off and be P/T.

Now I'm waiting for them to go to school so I'm not spending £800+ per month for the privilege of a quiet house for 3 afternoons a week.

Only 2 years to go...

Yes, I was so excited to go back to work! My husband kept saying it probably wouldn't be as great as I thought, but if anything it was even better

Hot coffee, adult company, weeing alone, full salary... what's not to love? Plus a proper lunch break, to myself, every day!

My friend was a school secretary, she said there were two types of parents, usually mothers. The first type had to be almost forced out of the child's classroom on the first day and needed her to supply tons of Kleenex, the second type walked out after a few minutes, closed the door and threw their arms into the air yelling Great!!!

Hot coffee, adult company, weeing alone, full salary... what's not to love? Plus a proper lunch break, to myself, every day!

Hot coffee and a proper lunch break? Not teaching then! My year 10s used to express such disgust at how long I left coffee sitting on my desk then drinking it hours later!

I didn't feel guilty at all... I was working 3 days though so felt that was a good balance.

My DC loved going to nursery and made. friends that they're still friends with 10 years on.

They're super confident and sociable and I think that's partly due to time at nursery so remember that you're doing them (and you!) a favour.

@JudgeJ

Hot coffee, adult company, weeing alone, full salary... what's not to love? Plus a proper lunch break, to myself, every day!

Hot coffee and a proper lunch break? Not teaching then! My year 10s used to express such disgust at how long I left coffee sitting on my desk then drinking it hours later!

Haha definitely not teaching :) I work in an office (well, pre-pandemic I did), responsible for nothing but spreadsheets... bliss!

@maddening

Toilet trips and hot cups of tea (rather than half a cup of lukewarm tea that I hadn't been able to get to)

The uninterrupted cup of tea is just the best thing and what I remember so much about going back to the office. Work is much less distracting than a baby! She’s 4 now and I still cherish every cup of tea I have when I’m alone.