WIBU to expect teens to spend child trust funds on university costs?

[flyingtartar]

My dc are 14 and 12 so it's not an immediate issue but I'm increasingly thinking about costs when they are in university. The eldest is very academic indeed and it's so far looking likely that both will go.

I'm divorced and get nothing from ex who has been poor, although about to come into a considerable inheritance from what I hear, but obviously his contribution is not something I can depend on. From research I think I need to save about £7-8k per child. I earn about £50k and usually manage to save about £500 per month but also have to save £10k for a payout to ex when ds2 is 21 and have a number of largish jobs to fund around the house as well. Eg bathroom hasn't been touched in 30 years, just had to replace a faulty Velux window in ds1's bedroom, had to replace the kitchen last year as it was falling apart, my car hasn't cost too much up to now but has about 110 000 miles so won't last forever etc. There's always something that takes my short -medium term savings.

I have £26k put away from an inheritance and that would probably cover the £10k and most of the university costs but it would be tight and would then leave me with no savings.

I get so anxious about the future and money. Once travel opens up I'd love to take the dc to Canada as it's somewhere they'd both love to go and I absolutely loved travelling with them in Europe before Covid hit, but that would mean dipping into the £26k a bit. Not a lot, but I feel like I shouldn't touch it at all but then what's the point of everything if we can't have a treat now and then?

Looking at paperwork I've realised the dc's trust funds (the ones that labour gave out of £250) are worth about £7k - obviously ds's is a bit more. Would it be UR to say if needed at least some of this should go on the university costs? DS is adamant he doesn't want a car as he's very environmentally conscious and we live in a city and he will probably go to uni in a city too so he sees it as unnecessary. Obviously there is also a deposit for property but hopefully he'll earn well in his 20s (and ds2) and if I downsize at some point then I'll be able to help them out.

I would feel a bit more comfortable knowing using the trust funds is an option but don't know if it's completely UR.

We have combined income of £100k+. DS can borrow fees money and about £4300 for living . We add £5 k to top up to what low income students can borrow. He also has supermarket job in holidays which gives him extra. So you probably wont need to draw on the trust fund. Yours has obviously done well. Biggest mistake I made was putting DS2 fund in a middle option - should have gambled it on the high risk as it was free money.

@mrsm43s

I feel differently to many.

My children's CTF is their money.

The parental contribution is my bill, assessed on my income. I wouldn't take my children's money to pay this bill of mine, any more than I'd take it to pay the grocery bill or the council tax.

It's means tested on parental income for a reason, because it's expected that parents pay the top up. If the student was meant to pay the top up themselves, it would be means tested against the students income and savings.

Basically, if you take this money, the OP is making herself better off at her children's expense.

I understand that she contributed to the savings, but why if the plan was to snatch it back at the first opportunity?

My children have pretty hefty CTFs, they won't be using them to pay for uni. I would like them to use them to pay for the deposits on their first bought home - but ultimately it will be their money, so it will be up to them.

You said it much better than I did!

@mrsm43s

I feel differently to many.

My children's CTF is their money.

The parental contribution is my bill, assessed on my income. I wouldn't take my children's money to pay this bill of mine, any more than I'd take it to pay the grocery bill or the council tax.

It's means tested on parental income for a reason, because it's expected that parents pay the top up. If the student was meant to pay the top up themselves, it would be means tested against the students income and savings.

Basically, if you take this money, the OP is making herself better off at her children's expense.

I understand that she contributed to the savings, but why if the plan was to snatch it back at the first opportunity?

My children have pretty hefty CTFs, they won't be using them to pay for uni. I would like them to use them to pay for the deposits on their first bought home - but ultimately it will be their money, so it will be up to them.

But didn't you put the money into the trust fund in the first place? And didn't you do it to secure their opportunities when they were no longer children?

This is why I feel no guilt asking them to use some trust fund money to top up uni loans. It's part of what the trust was for. The rest is for a house deposit.

Depends on where they go. If they can live at home for second and third year you might need very little. Or if they're in a city which has lower costs. It also depends on their course. I teach students who work almost full time alongside their degree and yes they do struggle and it's hard but they are bloody motivated to get a good degree as a result!

To the OP - honestly don't make yourself broke taking the DCs to Canada. They know you love them and are looking after them, that's the most important thing.

For those saying don't use CTF for university living costs because it's the DCs money, I really don't get that. I can see if a DP was planning to use the money for an extension or indeed family holiday that wouldn't be ideal, but in my mind the money is for anything needed in the DCs future including uni costs, car, house deposit and/or wedding costs.

Not unreasonable at all- this sort of thing is exactly what it’s for.

You’re right about taking all the loans though too; it works out better then you just top up from the trust fund. Well done you for forward planning!