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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Wait to buy a house before TTC or rent with a baby?

40 replies

Adultingdecisions · 01/06/2021 09:24

I’m in a dilemma that I’m sure loads of people are also in because of covid. I’m 35 in a couple of months, so is my DP. We are renting a small two bedroom house with the second bedroom used by my teenage child from previous relationship. Space is tight here with the three of us now, I moved in as a single parent when DC was little and it was perfect but we’ve definitely outgrown it. We are able to save some money most months though as the rent is more than affordable on two full time salaries.

We have a house deposit ready to go to buy a 3 bed semi, but covid has screwed our house purchasing plans for the last few months with hardly any houses coming on the market and when they do they’re snapped up before we get a look in. We are tethered to our current area due to DC school and family. Adding to the issue is the fact we would love to TTC, and given my age I don’t want to hang about too long. Clearly I’ve had a baby before (unplanned as I was young) but I’m aware that’s no guarantee it could happen easily again.

We have discussed renting a larger house for now, which would mean no substantial monthly saving would be possible but would give us the much needed extra space we need for our current setup and for a future DC. Buying a house in the future may then be difficult however as I’d be on a part time wage and our mortgage affordability would be affected. Also we have a cat which 95% of landlords seem to rule out before you even get to have a viewing.

I have no idea what to do for the best.

OP posts:

Catswithflamingos · 01/06/2021 19:04

@shouldistop

I wouldn't wait at 35. I would get to the registry office first though (just personally, up to you obviously)

The 1950s called...

shouldistop · 01/06/2021 20:18

@Catswithflamingos it's nothing to do with the 1950s op has already mentioned she'll be going part time after the baby. Wise to make sure she's married before reducing her earning capacity and pension.

Overthebow · 01/06/2021 20:23

Buy before you have the baby. If you’re planning to drop to part time you may struggle to get the mortgage you need once baby is here, plus another dependant and any childcare fees will count against you too.

Dishwashersaurous · 01/06/2021 20:23

Ttc whilst house hunting. Baby in your room for six months anyway.

So you've got 15 months minimum to find a house.

Dishwashersaurous · 01/06/2021 20:25

And definitely get the mortgage before you go part time etc.

Also physically go into all the local estate agents and explain your position then you will get called even before houses officially go on the market.

ComeOnPeople · 01/06/2021 20:29

@SushiGo I agree

Newmumatlast · 01/06/2021 20:31

I would buy then ttc. Or else stay where you are for longer - baby can stay in with you for first year - and then move.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 01/06/2021 20:34

Also physically go into all the local estate agents and explain your position then you will get called even before houses officially go on the market.

This! If you’re looking on Rightmove or Zoopla, you’re already too late. The best places are being snapped up instantly in my area.

Have you got a mortgage in principle? If not, get one. A lot of estate agents aren’t showing people around if they’re not able to proceed straight away. You might find out you can’t get a mortgage for as much as you thought.

MyDcAreMarvel · 01/06/2021 20:36

A baby can easily stay in your room until age 2, you are really overthinking this. Most likely you will have 3+ years before an extra bedroom is necessary.

percheron67 · 01/06/2021 20:58

Buy before the baby I think. You have had children before so no reason to think you cannot conceive. Once the baby arrives you may not be able to arrange a mortgage etc..

Bluntness100 · 01/06/2021 21:00

Buy now. You just need to be quicker off the mark op. There’s no reason you can’t.

Dishwashersaurous · 02/06/2021 12:03

You need to treat house hunting like a job.

Phoning Estate agents fortnightly to see if anything is coming on.

And as soon as it go and see it, don't wait until the weekend.

Make it your priority

Original poster

Adultingdecisions · 03/06/2021 09:01

Such a mix of responses - my gut is leaning towards buying a house before TTC and I agree with a poster who said my existing child comes first and providing them with security is a huge priority.

I hadn’t thought about going into estate agents in person, last time we got on the lists it was phone contact only due to lockdown but I can see how this would ensure we come across as committed and serious.

And yes we are planning a (simple and cost effective ) wedding

OP posts:

VestaTilley · 03/06/2021 09:15

Definitely try and buy first. Once a baby comes along you’ll struggle to save with mat leave and childcare costs, plus renting is stressful owing to rising rents and insecure tenancies.

We’re buying now with a 2 year old, and I really wish we’d bought first. We’re only able to buy because the Govt have supported the return of 95% mortgages and our DPs have been able to lend us money towards a deposit.

Just wait. Late 30s isn’t too old.

dutchessmom · 14/06/2021 10:33

For now stay where you are, maybe start ttc, and remember even if you get a BFP from the 1st try, you will need a new room for the baby in at least a year from now. This way, you keep saving more money for the house, and hopefully things will be much better with the pandemic.

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