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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Preference please

17 replies

Mzy123 · 27/05/2021 22:26

So its our friends 50th birthday, 4 of us have put in £75 each to buy her a birthday present . There are differing views as to what to buy. One friend who collected the money decided to buy a canvas tote bag, perfume, flowers and a rope bracelet. Two of us think as its a special birthday we would prefer to buy something more expensive like a decent bracelet/pair of earrings using the bulk of the money. Something she could keep and something she wouldn't just go out and buy herself. Other person has no fixed view and doesn't mind either way. We would only buy flowers/fizz with whatever is left over. So what would you prefer if you were the recipient? Happy to have Mumsnetters settle this for us

OP posts:
FangsForTheMemory · 27/05/2021 22:27

One big thing, every time. Canvas tote bag for a big birthday? No way.

WithRosesAroundTheDoor · 27/05/2021 22:28

Second option

UpTheJunktion · 27/05/2021 22:28

Lovely bracelet, bag, or something significant.

Thedogscollar · 27/05/2021 22:33

Totally agree with @FangsForTheMemory
One big thing over a lot of tut.
A canvas tote bagShock just no.

Original poster
Mzy123 · 27/05/2021 22:40

Well that's what I thought, it is a designer name tote bag but canvas never the less and the bracelet although nice is just a fashion accessory, and will date terribly (if it even lasts).

OP posts:
Jizzonmy · 27/05/2021 22:41

Second option

TheTeenageYears · 27/05/2021 22:56

A bigger present or whats the point of clubbing together, presumably you could buy one each of those items as individuals.

MumW · 27/05/2021 22:57

Big birthday, quality not quantity every time.

sbhydrogen · 27/05/2021 22:59

Second option, please. Something really luxurious.

SheldonesqueTheBstard · 27/05/2021 23:02

The special present.

Something to remind her on her lovely friends forever.

pheasantsinlove · 27/05/2021 23:03

Definitely option B. I'd like some earrings with real emeralds please! 😁

Anoisagusaris · 27/05/2021 23:23

Definitely the 2nd- one big thing. My friends gave me the first option for my 40th and I was disappointed as we’d done the 2nd for everyone else’s.

Elouera · 27/05/2021 23:27

How did you come up with each putting in £75 each without having a clue what you would be spending it on firstly??? Confused

Option 2 for sure! IF you know her taste for a bracelet/earring etc. Canvas bag for a special birthday is naff!

Leeds2 · 27/05/2021 23:29

I would prefer one "big" gift, if it were me.

MiddlesexGirl · 27/05/2021 23:32

Option 2 also.
Unless you know that canvas tote bags are absolutely her thing.

Original poster
Mzy123 · 27/05/2021 23:40

We put £75 in each for first friends 50th in December. Quite a lot but as its a special birthday and it was lockdown we couldn't go for a meal/drinks so we agreed on that figure. We bought her a weekend away in a lovely spa hotel which she's delighted with. She's booked to go next month. Different person collecting this time and she obviously thought she would buy the gifts she thought best. We decided to just stick with the same amount but I thought that we would again spend the bulk on one gift. As others have said, what's the point in all pooling together to buy 4 separate items.

OP posts:
ToffeePennie · 27/05/2021 23:41

Something really luxurious that she wouldn’t normally treat herself to. If she wears earrings/necklace etc, get her something truly special.

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