Are they being Cf's?

[mumtoallbhoys]

I have had my son in Creche since he was 1-5.5 (Ireland so kids go to school later), second son 1-3.5. With school starting in September I am moving them both to the school site. No complaint or issue with the Creche, purely logistics.

I have always had a good relationship with the Creche, I actually paid them in the lockdown even though my sons weren't there. The government bailed them out in the end so they refunded me all but 1 month. They have 45 parents and only 2/45 paid them this month, the other parents were key workers so they actually had the childcare I didn't.

When I cancelled my places I was giving 5 weeks notice, the contract states 8 weeks. The co-owner said not to worry she can make an exception, she has a waiting list etc. I messaged her twice saying I could help her fill the 2 slots she said, "don't worry it is fine". She sent a Creche wide message saying it is 8 weeks notice, a separate note to me saying "not to worry about my boys, it is just they do need the 8 weeks from most people". I said fine, confirmed again that she doesn't need help filling the spots.

Stupidly I didn't amend my monthly direct debit and it went to them. I met the other owner outside and said apologies the direct debit went... could I have a refund for the 2 weeks when she gets the chance. She is now saying I have to give the full 8 weeks. I said that isn't what I agreed with other co-owner and she said she doubted it but she would check. Later that day she sent me an email confirming I was mistaken.

AIBU to be seriously annoyed by this? I have treated them with such respect and kindness.

I would still send a polite email with the screenshots. You're not kicking off, you're asking for something that was agreed.

I think I will ask to see the woman who agreed it with me and discuss it, how could she look me in the eye.... she surely knows what she said on the phone. I will send a follow up mail though because obviously her word can't be trusted.

I think I will say " I am surprised by this communication from co-owner 2 because that isn't what we agreed.".... see what she says if she denies it I will say these messages don't make any sense if I am indeed being held to my full contractual period....

I would say fine I’ll keep my kids in there till the end and make sure they don’t double book my kids place.
Niceness gets you nowhere.

I would message the original co owner and say you're confused because you thought you'd agreed 5 weeks notice and send her the screenshots. I would then put that if you do need to give the full 8 weeks notice then you will keep your child with them until that time is up.

Don't bother talking to them face to face, get everything in writing!

I would tell them they either give you a refund or you're sending the kids in until the end. Don't let them sell the same place twice! Also push to get the 1 month refund back that they didn't give you before. You have been too nice so they think you're a pushover. Something like:

Hi Nursery

There must be some confusion here. On a phone call on X date told me the 8 weeks notice did not apply in my case and followed up with this message .

Unfortunately my full direct debit still went through. Please refund me X amount as agreed with . If you are unable to process my refund, I will continue to send Kid1 and Kid2 until the end of the 8 week period.

Also, as you are aware, I paid full fees during lockdown. You later partially refunded these after receiving the Government bail out, however one month has still not been refunded. Please transfer this outstanding amount to me at your earliest opportunity. My bank details are XXXX.

Thanks in advance
Mumtoallboys

That keeps all the personal stuff out of it, but is clear about what they owe you and your expectations.

It’s tricky because their rule is 8 weeks. Did you sign a contract? I did for DD’s nursery which has clauses like this.

It’s probably a case of them now having a bit of friction between each other. The owner who doesn’t say it’s ok sounds more annoyed with the other owner.

While I agree with you OP based purely on those messages I don’t think you have a case unfortunately
I would still argue but if it comes down to it those messages don’t really help

Ask for a meeting with both co-owners present & bring your text msgs/emails albeit they might be a bit vague. I'd ramp it up rather than let it go...as you said, you've be more than fair in challenging months & they can fill the place without difficulty. I imagind it's a few quid for two kids for a couple of weeks & not to be sneezed at. If the don't back down...I'd be checking if new kids arrived during period I was still paying for my kids places & if so, I'd kick up holy murder that creche were cashing in like that....or maybe, as your husband said, leave kids there for duration...they may have to inconvenience new incoming parents then if had alreasy agreed start date two weeks earlier than now can offer... they might value the new relationship more & re-think trying to make the extra money by holding you to the contract. I doubt your kids would suffer for it in terms of care...that would be taking things to a different level, I can't imagine they'd be that immoral or stupid & presumably are reputable in their care if they are so sought after with such a long wait list. But...even though I think I might follow the above, perhaps you are just increaaing your stress unnecessarily around this situation & if that is do...sometimes it is better to concede & think I should have cancelled the SO/DD...learn from that & move on a bit angered but leaving it in the past sooner.

Also, unless it is different in Ireland, you don’t control the direct debit - the company does so it should have been them that cancelled it not you.

Unless you mean officially calling their accounts department to cancel your contract? Then yes you would have had to do that at least 5 days for the payment was due otherwise it would already be in the process of collecting

Sorry...lots of typos..rushing to work!

I spoke to co-owner 1 and she said that she is fine with 5 weeks. The way the government funds Creche's in IRL (because of covid) they have lost a lot of control of start dates. They are really being held over a barrel on everything out of the ordinary. Normally she wouldn't bother trying to argue the point, but because I was made redundant she can claim exceptional circumstances (it is a category on the list). I said I won't see her out of pocket which she appreciated. I am going to pay her the money and when she gets it back she will refund me.

@SionnachGlic

Something about your post really resonated with me. I just dealt with it straight away.

My husband is good with stress but this would consume me, which just wouldn't be worth it. I am glad I spoke to the one I know really well. We were both diplomatic abs respectful. Obviously if they lose money I should pay as per the contract, if they don't shouldn't. She agreed

I think you seem to think that you can breach your contract with them because you paid throughout lockdown. Unfortunately the two situations aren't related.

It would have been nice to have let you off with the three weeks, but ultimately they ask for 8 weeks - and you know this - so you don't really have a leg to stand on here.

@LindaEllen

Contractually yes, But you can mutually agree an early end date. Contracts are not always enforced (or maybe they are with you). It makes the world a warmer place are more about partnership then contracts. Obviously one party can't be left suffering.

If the owner had said we had to go with the contractual term I would have been upset but accepting. That isn't what she said, she said we will make an exception. She didn't tell me there was an official loophole, she thought the redundancy was enough to process. She didn't tell the other co-owner probably because the other one is hard work

I would save some of the money you will lose by not giving the leaving gifts I would have otherwise have given and I would put a review on the Internet explaining all you have told us here. Keep it factual but explain how long you were a customer, how you paid over lockdown when you weren't using it and they offered to waive 2 of the 8 weeks notice and agreed on 6 weeks and then reneged on this and took 8 weeks. You aren't using 2 of the weeks and they had a waiting list for the spaces. Keep to accurate facts so they can't be annoyed by it if you are in a small village.