To not get them present/ card?

[Capricorn8990]

I'm always one for getting friends cards/ birthday present. Last year I got my friends vouchers sent via email.

This year, 2 of them didn't get me a present which I am not fussed about, but they never even sent a card.

My partner says not to bother getting them a present let alone a card now.. I said I don't give to receive (presents) but cards don't cost much and the sentiment is meaningful.

AIBU to not get them a present and/ or card?

For context my mum gives, gives, gives and rarely gets acknowledged by "family" and I always harp on to her not to bother.. maybe I should listen to my own advice

I wouldn’t take a lack of card as a reflection on your friendship or how they feel about you at all. It’s just less of a thing these days, most people are happy with reciprocal texts for birthdays. Obviously if it’s in a wider context of you feeling taken for granted that’s more of an issue.

You sound very kind OP. Personally I would rather not get gifts from friends, it's just another thing to remember to return - I do love birthdays though and enjoy fussing over people ( with cake etc)

I send cards even if someone has forgotten to send me one that year I still do it; I don’t send them to receive them. I send them because I want that person to have something from me

I much prefer to not have to buy presents for my friends, and I really don't want them buying me one. To me it's just one more thing I have to remember and plan for. I have a couple of friends who always buy me a present and I do the same, but I really wish we had never started, We don't need more stuff and it's getting harder to think of things to get.

Regarding cards, I avoid buying them as much as I can. Mainly for environmental reasons but also because I don't like getting them myself. I just feel bad because you can't recycle most of them. A text or a call is fine if you don't see the person irl..