Celebrating other people's wedding anniversaries

[MaizeBlouse]

Maybe IABU here but is it really accepted that we should buy a gift and send a card etc for other peoples wedding anniversaries? AIBU to say No?

I have a big family with 4 siblings and I am expected to donate towards a gift for my 2 siblings wedding anniversaries as well as my parents'. Every year!! Along with buying birthday gifts and Christmas gifts. It's bloody expensive for one thing and for the other part I don't really see the point.
Surely it's just thier celebration from tthen on

I would be happy to donate for a milestone anniversary I.e 10/25 years and would.perhaps send a text on the day if I remembered in other non significant years but I thinj that'd probably my limit.

It may colour my view that I am not married (though I've been with my DP a long time) so maybe I don't "get it" but surely if I attended a wedding, gave a gift and ccelebrated n the day theb I've kind of done my bit.

I rarely remember my own, or have money spare to celebrate.

I don't know anyone who buys presents for their siblings wedding anniversaries. Even for parents it would have to be a big one. Now I am older I need far less presents in my life.

It's not a thing.

Our parents send a card (well, MIL does). DH does something a week after it happened and I don't remember it at all so he gets to look like the great romantic.

This is pretty much replicating what my DM and DF did as well.

You only get gifts for a major anniversary and even then only because you have personally paid for a massive party.

I don’t get it either. I always find it a bit weird if we get a card for our anniversary from anyone else.

I don't expect other people to remember our wedding anniversary. We got lots of cards for our silver though, and my auntie bought us a couple of really nice teacups and saucers, but we didn't and don't expect anything. It is our ruby wedding anniversary this year, so a card or two to acknowledge it would be nice. DH and I never buy each other cards and presents for our wedding anniversaries as we prefer to celebrate with a nice meal.

Milestones yes, if the are throwing a big do every time, yes. Other than that it's their and only their celebration.

But you do sound grinchy about birthday presents etc. Nothing wrong with celebrating.

Friends have been having silver weddings lately; I don't think they expected anybody but spouses and children to remember. If they've mentioned it in passing, I've said congratulations. Golden weddings, there's usually a party - so that's a reminder and I've sent flowers.
Normal anniversaries are of no significance to anyone except the couple, and even then - not much!

Absolutely not. Wedding anniversaries are for the couple except maybe milestone ones. And then I would only do it for parents. The first milestone one for me would be the 25th followed by the 40th and each ten years thereafter at which point if they have children then they should be the ones to help celebrate.

No.

I'd celebrate the milestone ones. And of course join in with gusto if there was an anniversary party.

But not beyond that. Though my siblings and I did step up to mark my parents' anniversary with my DMum after she was widowed - which is not exactly 'celebrating' as per thread title but which feels like an important commemoration

I send a 1st anniversary card if I've been to the wedding, but after that I don't bother.

I'd do a gift if I was at a party for the anniversary.

I'd probably send a card to a friend or family member if I knew it was a big one, but I don't keep track so I'd have to be reminded!

We get an anniversary card each year from my parents and a couple of the older guests always remember but I wouldn't expect it.

I don't think it's normal to have a whip round every anniversary and birthday, just for big ones.

A card is sufficient if you wanted to, maybe a small gift for 25+ years but definitely not a present for every anniversary.