Posting here for traffic. Last Jan I was diagnosed type 2 diabetic. Not really a surprise as I had it in my pregnancies. I was keen to share it with my family members as I know it can run in families etc. So I held off for a month or so until I processed it myself and then told me sisters, no big deal. I held off on mentioning it to my parents as my mother had been referred for a biopsy on a her boob. She was since diagnosed with very early breast cancer but is doing fine. I told my dad 3 weeks ago and asked him not to mention it to my mam for now, he agreed it wouldn't be a good idea. She was awaiting results and was a nervous wreck. She is in really good form this week, test results were good. So I told her. Cue sh!t storm. Caused a huge fight that she was last to find out. I explained why I didn't tell her at the time. It caused a huge fight between my parents, she was "devestated" he didn't tell her.
So I've had 2 of my 3 sisters phone me, having a go at me for telling her everyone knew. She has been so upset she was the last to find out. Phoned my dad today and he doesn't want me to tell him anything anymore that I'm not telling mam and advised me to tell her everything that is going on because if she finds out later she gets vwry upset.
I am so upset that my family have treated me this way. There is a long history of her exaggerating things I have said to her and then I get dogs abuse from the rest of the family. She completely alienates me from the rest of the family if I do anything"wrong". We range in ages from mid twenties to late thirties and she always has to be at the centre of everything. I lost a baby a few years ago, halfway during the pregnancy and she got mad at me when I said I didn't want to talk about it, in response to her questions about us spending time with him in hospital. She didn't speak to me for an hour.
I'm so sick of walking on eggshells around her. I'm so sick of my siblings always jumping on me for "upsetting mam". They acknowledge that her reactions to things are not "normal" but it's my fault, I should know she is like that and live my life in a way that doesn't upset her. I really would love to reduce contact with her but I would miss my dad and the rest of my family. I just don't know what to do. Should I just tell her everything or should I just keep her at arms length all the time. I'm afraid to tell my sister's anything now incase they let something slip. She now isn't sleeping as she thinks we are keeping things from her. Just to add she has suffered with her mental health dreadfully over the years and refuses to get any help.