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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not know how to get into beauty?

49 replies

ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:04

Largely posting here for traffic. I'm in my mid-20s and I have no idea how to get into beauty - I'm baffled by the whole thing.
I want to be "beautiful". I'm very pale, and just very plain looking but I'm anxious about booking treatments because I have no idea what to book or how to maintain things. I'd really appreciate any tips.
I'm looking into:

  • Lip filler - do I go for .5ml or 1ml, how different will they look? How much does it hurt (I'm pretty good with pain and needles in general but does the filler burn or anything?). How often do they need to be done? Do I need to do anything to maintain them? Will they swell up or anything after having them done?
  • Waxing - I'd like a full Hollywood but no idea how often I'd need to get it re-done or what the etiquette is? Due to a sexual assault, I have some scarring down there and not sure whether to mention this in advance or not? Do you give a tip for a wax? Are there different types of wax or do you just get one?
  • Tan - is a professional tan much better than one of those spray bottles? How long will it last? Will it go blotchy?
  • Eyelashes - what the hell?! What is "Russian"? How often do they need to be redone? Will they look awful if I don't get them redone? Do you still need to wear mascara? Do they need any extra maintenance? Do they need to do the bottom lashes or just the tops?
Are there any other treatments you'd recommend? I've always been out of the loop or behind with these kinds of things and just got by on being young. But now I really think I need a bit more oomph in my looks and I have no idea where to start.
OP posts:
Kidsaregrim · 21/05/2021 16:08

I could have written this post a few years back!

Start with a salon that does all what you need and then book a consultation with a beautician, they will guide you on everything you need. Eye lashes normally last about a couple of weeks and waxing about 4-6 depending on your regrowth.

Tan, I prefer sun beds as an all over tan which is even and doesn’t give me orange hands and ankles, they can be used safely if you follow guidance.

Good luck with your makeover!

Merryoldgoat · 21/05/2021 16:08

Well. I wouldn’t start with cosmetic procedures! That’s a bit drastic to begin.

I’d start with fixing ‘problems’ do proper treatment for dental issues, skin issues etc.

Then a good haircut and some makeup lessons.

See what kind of look you like.

If you want fillers etc after you’ve played around with makeup and a new look then fine but I’d leave it until you’re sure.

Also, if you’re not used to being ‘high maintenance’ I’d go slow because if you get bored and neglect everything you’ll end up looking mangled.

Merryoldgoat · 21/05/2021 16:09

Tan, I prefer sun beds as an all over tan which is even and doesn’t give me orange hands and ankles, they can be used safely if you follow guidance.

You might like sun beds but they cannot be used safely and it’s ridiculous saying they can.

Peace43 · 21/05/2021 16:10

I’d say “sod that” and go do something more fun with my time and money!! Rock climbing, trampolining, sailing, lunch with friends!!

ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:11

@Kidsaregrim

I could have written this post a few years back!

Start with a salon that does all what you need and then book a consultation with a beautician, they will guide you on everything you need. Eye lashes normally last about a couple of weeks and waxing about 4-6 depending on your regrowth.

Tan, I prefer sun beds as an all over tan which is even and doesn’t give me orange hands and ankles, they can be used safely if you follow guidance.

Good luck with your makeover!

Thank you. I'll do this. Unfortunately, I'll never tan on a sun bed. Quite frankly, I could lie on the surface of the sun itself and still look like Edward Cullen.
OP posts:
woodhill · 21/05/2021 16:12

So would I.

I'm sure you are lovely. It's a right con imo

woodhill · 21/05/2021 16:12

Why do you need to be tanned. You could use a gradual tanner on your face like Clarins drops?

ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:13

@Merryoldgoat

Well. I wouldn’t start with cosmetic procedures! That’s a bit drastic to begin.

I’d start with fixing ‘problems’ do proper treatment for dental issues, skin issues etc.

Then a good haircut and some makeup lessons.

See what kind of look you like.

If you want fillers etc after you’ve played around with makeup and a new look then fine but I’d leave it until you’re sure.

Also, if you’re not used to being ‘high maintenance’ I’d go slow because if you get bored and neglect everything you’ll end up looking mangled.

Thank you. I'm not a complete novice - I wear make up every day and will spray tan at home with those spray bottles from Boots. My teeth have always been straight, perhaps not as white as they were before I began drinking 58907 cups of tea every day. I don't think I have any skin issues?
OP posts:
MolotovMocktail · 21/05/2021 16:13

I can’t believe people still use sun beds in 2021, how dumb can you get. The Style & Beauty board on here is really helpful OP.

ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:15

@Peace43

I’d say “sod that” and go do something more fun with my time and money!! Rock climbing, trampolining, sailing, lunch with friends!!
I just want to look good. We did go rock climbing recently, I used to do it as a child (not on real rocks, just inside in those big rooms). If you could see the size of my breasts you'd know trampolining is a pair of black eyes waiting to happen and sailing unfortunately makes me very sea sick. I could do the lunching though. Maybe I'll do both? I'll be outdoorsy with plump lips and a tan?
OP posts:
ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:18

@woodhill

Why do you need to be tanned. You could use a gradual tanner on your face like Clarins drops?
Honestly, I just look ill otherwise. I'm so pale that I'm almost translucent. I look so much healthier with a tan. I'll look up the Clarins drops, I hadn't heard of them - thank you!
OP posts:
ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:19

@MolotovMocktail

I can’t believe people still use sun beds in 2021, how dumb can you get. The Style & Beauty board on here is really helpful OP.
Thank you - I'll have a browse. I did have a beautician tell me a few years ago that certain sun beds can now differentiate between UVa and UVb light or something and that makes them safer? But I don't know - they wouldn't work for me anyway.
OP posts:
ZenNudist · 21/05/2021 16:24

Yeah get on with all that. Now you're mid 20s you must be looking really haggard. Better pump in the fillers and plaster on the fake tan.

Everyone has a different definition of beauty. Most people don't associate it with fake tan, brow treatments and fillers. I think I'm more for the natural approach. I reckon you'd look better if you saved youd money and just did your hair and had nice clothes and make up. Oh, and exercise.

baldafrique · 21/05/2021 16:25

Why do you equate being very pale with not being attractive?

ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:29

@baldafrique

Why do you equate being very pale with not being attractive?
This is what I've said "I just look ill otherwise. I'm so pale that I'm almost translucent. I look so much healthier with a tan". That's my reason.
OP posts:
ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:30

@ZenNudist

Yeah get on with all that. Now you're mid 20s you must be looking really haggard. Better pump in the fillers and plaster on the fake tan.

Everyone has a different definition of beauty. Most people don't associate it with fake tan, brow treatments and fillers. I think I'm more for the natural approach. I reckon you'd look better if you saved youd money and just did your hair and had nice clothes and make up. Oh, and exercise.

"Everyone has a different definition of beauty". I'm entitled to mine without the sarcasm and nasty comments.
OP posts:
HollowTalk · 21/05/2021 16:38

I really wouldn't go down the lip filler route. Can't you just go to a beautician and ask for some advice? You don't want to look fake, do you? If you're not even used to make up etc then all of the things you talk about are just too much for you.

MargosKaftan · 21/05/2021 16:39

I would say if you look ill without a tan, there's a chance what you need is a decent make up lesson for your skin, not change your skin colour. Pale can look fabulous, but many foundations, concealers, blushers etc are slightly the wrong tones for very naturally pale people, so you end up looking a bit peaky.

Id go for a very good make over/make up lesson and if you still don't like the professional make up look on your skin, then look at fake tan. Dont sun bed, am beginning to see the damage to my face from natural suntans. Avoid if you can.

ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:39

@HollowTalk

I really wouldn't go down the lip filler route. Can't you just go to a beautician and ask for some advice? You don't want to look fake, do you? If you're not even used to make up etc then all of the things you talk about are just too much for you.
Thank you - I wear make up every day, I just don't get beauty treatments professionally done.
OP posts:
MargosKaftan · 21/05/2021 16:40

For Brazilian waxing, assume about 4-5 weeks in between. It hurts.

ThatChristinaAguileraSong · 21/05/2021 16:42

@MargosKaftan

I would say if you look ill without a tan, there's a chance what you need is a decent make up lesson for your skin, not change your skin colour. Pale can look fabulous, but many foundations, concealers, blushers etc are slightly the wrong tones for very naturally pale people, so you end up looking a bit peaky.

Id go for a very good make over/make up lesson and if you still don't like the professional make up look on your skin, then look at fake tan. Dont sun bed, am beginning to see the damage to my face from natural suntans. Avoid if you can.

Thank you, but it's not just my face. My arms and my hands look very odd without a tan, almost like that wrapping on summer rolls - you can see everything underneath. I do my fake tan at home but I'm not sure what's different about getting it done professionally.
OP posts:
Bunny2021 · 21/05/2021 16:49
  • Lip filler - don't for now. I know so many peers who had it done in their early 20s and regret it. As a PP said - maybe get some make up lessons and learn how to apply make up rather than going drastic from the start.
  • Waxing - I get Hollywood waxing done - it's usually every 6 weeks or so. Find a place that uses Lycon wax (and knows how to use it properly) - it's usually a bit more expensive but significantly less painful. Take paracetamol and ibuprofen an hour before. It will be more painful around your period. I never tip. I would suggest having a look at several salons and maybe try and talk to them about your past assualt and just ensure you feel comfortable going there. I've been to some weird places when I haven't been able to go to my usual and always regret it - when you find a great waxing place, it's totally worth it.
  • Tan - I tan at home (I get my husband to do my back / have used friends in the past). I'm casper pale and so many tans turn me orange! The best I've found are Dove gradual (get the dark one) - the darker based ones have more green base, so less likely to go orange. I find one layer, will still show as a tan. It goes on clear so slightly harder to see where it streaks. For proper fake tan, always use a mitt and I really recommend St Moriz (it's about £6) mousse - again I always use the dark (not Ultra Dark). It comes out with a guide colour so you can see where you've been which is really helpful.

I do find the colour transfers (when guide colour is on) to my sheets and clothes, wear dark loose clothes whilst it develops and I bought a tanning/sleeping bag thing to sleep in when I'm tanning.

I've heard really good things about Isle of Paradise drops that you can add to moistouriser etc but again, for me I need the guide colour to see where I've been. I would avoid St Tropez at all costs - always makes me so orange.

Exfoliate in advance - I usually do a couple of sessions a few days in advance and moistourise (oil free). On the day, I will only add a small amount of moistouriser to my knees, elbows and feet.

  • Eyelashes - just go for hybrid or less. Russian lashes are way too much for everyday, especially if you're not used to them. Mine have lasted several weeks. You don't need mascara with them (except for bottom lashes). I often get my lashes tinted before having extensions so that the bottom ones have some colour. You can get bottom lash extensions but it's really not worth it. I would suggest starting off with quite simple/everyday lashes - you can always have more added if you want.

The first ones I ever had done, I looked like a clown. Find somewhere reputable, if you're in a city, use something like Treatwell to look for reviews. They should always give you a patch test before applying lashes - the good places will do a patch test on your actual eyeline (many do it on your neck but your neck isn't anywhere near as sensitive as the eyes). Don't use any oil based cleanser and they will last a really good time. Most places will give you a clean mascara wand to brush them - I also use a microfibre towel to pat them dry when I get out of the shower.

If you're not ready for extensions, have a look at LVL (with a tint) - my friend used to always have extensions but now swears by LVL.

Your natural lashes won't fall out (unless you pull out the extensions) - they might just look more sparse after you've had extensions.

Eyebrows - if you don't already, I really recommend having them tinted - mine are blonde and just disappear if I don't fill them in. Having them tinted (for me) makes such a difference.

Hope that helps! I was totally useless for years when it came to this stuff - my mum had no interest in beauty and I have older brothers.

BrownEyedGirl80 · 21/05/2021 17:10

I had 1ml of lip filler recently and it's looks natural.You need to research the person you choose to do it though as results can vary.

ZenNudist · 21/05/2021 17:28

OP you are indeed entitled to go for what look you want. I was reacting to your suggestion that in your mid 20s you are no longer beautiful. Maybe you're right. I just didn't think you should do yourself down.

Not everyone can be beautiful and if a tonne of treatments make you feel better about yourself then crack on. The problem is no one can sell you self esteem.

MargosKaftan · 21/05/2021 17:56

The professional fake tanning is more the colour is more even and hopefully they'll do a better match so you don't look orange like you are wearing fake tan, more that you've been on holiday.

Fake eyelashes can look fabulous, for the first time stress you want to look natural, and then you can always go more full on next time round.

(Actually thats good advice for everything, start asking for as natural as possible and scale it up. )

Its expensive though.

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