To expect to not have to chase him for child maintenance every week

[cadburyegg]

H and I split in December. We’ve had a lot of quibbles and issues since then but one thing I’ve never had to worry about until recently is child maintenance - he set up a standing order and pays weekly (it’s easier on him weekly cos he gets paid weekly).

However, 3 times in the last 4-5 weeks or so I’ve had to chase him because it hasn’t come through. First time I was like ok, just a mistake. Second time, again I didn’t mind too much. But I just had to chase him again today.

I’m so tired with the kids and so I may be overreacting but he came over last night and told me that he’s earning lots more now 🤔 but the maintenance hasn’t increased. He also said he’d pay for half of DS6’s beavers subs but that hasn’t materialised. I’m so sick of having to chase him. I know it’s only a small thing but it’s really wound me up. When I chased him this week he was like “oh yeah it’s cos it comes out of my bills account lol”??? Kids are 6 and 3 so we have many more years of this. Am I going to have to chase him EVERY week for the next 15 years???

Oh and it also irrationally annoys me that this has only been happening since he met his new girlfriend

CMS.

If you go through CMS then maintenance will increase with his earnings and you won't have to chase.

this was me. CMS sorted that out for me. No more arguments about the amount or payment

CMS. It’s what they are there for

I suspect if you mentioned CMS and if he failed again you would go through CMS, he would pay promptly every time. Though it must not be an idle threat.

CMS, they will send an order to his HR department and payroll will deduct it from his pay each month.
We are not allowed to cancel it unless we get a cancellation order from the CMS. Safest way of securing payment each month.

Get on to the CMS ASAP. Otherwise it's a slippery slope into paying nothing

Just go through cms

I agree that CMS is the way to go, but just to manage expectations ime they will not deduct the maintenance at source except as a very last resort, which despite my ex being late paying repeatedly, and me telling them every single time, they have never yet agreed to move to collect and pay for me. It is much better than trying to work it out without outside help, but it is not a magic wand that removes all hassle or the potential for him to continue to piss you around, at least for some time to come.