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Contact is always on his terms

5 replies

Tothemoonandbackx · 16/05/2021 14:04

AIBU to be slightly miffed that my long distance partner is always the one to organise contact, and then just not bother!! Case in point, this morning, he messaged me and asked if I was free for a chat (in the morning) and then a message after saying he missed me, I said I was at work, but would be free to take a call anytime in the a.m (it's very quite at the moment). He asked if I was on my own and I said I would be till 10:30, he then asked if it would be OK to call when the other person was there, and I said yes, that'll be fine.........we're now on 2:00 and no phone call, no message to say why, nothing, the thing is, it isn't the first time he's done this, it's not really an AIBU,I just feel like a vent, but no doubt he'll call later in the evening for a 10 minute chat on the way back from the pub, I feel so disheartened, I have told him before that I'd rather he just not bother telling me he's going to call me, as I won't be let down AGAIN when he doesn't Xx

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?


You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

AnneLovesGilbert · 16/05/2021 14:07

You’re being very passive. Why don’t you initiate contact?


AFS1 · 16/05/2021 14:15

How long have you 2 been together? It doesn’t really sound as if either of you are that bothered, to be honest.


Tothemoonandbackx · 16/05/2021 14:23

@AnneLovesGilbert I really do try to, but as he's self employed and works odd hours, I'll always ask if it's ok to chat, as I don't want to just call if he's in the middle of a job and sometimes I'll get a message back, and sometimes I won't, but it always seems to be on his terms, as he says he'll call me when I've asked if he's free for a chat, and then say something like, I'll call you in 5, and then a couple of hours later, he'll get in touch Sad Xx

OP posts:

MackenCheese · 16/05/2021 14:31

It sounds like he has other relationships on the go. I once went out with a guy like this, and he was playing 3 of us at once! Sorry, OP, but I smell a rat!


Tothemoonandbackx · 16/05/2021 20:03

@MackenCheese the more I re-read what I've put, it does look that way Sad, we've only been together for just over a year, (couple of weeks before the first lockdown), and at first it never bothered me, as I thought I was being considerate to his working hours and I always try to people please, and he seemed to appreciate that I wouldn't disturb him at work, but now looking at it, really looking at it, I've been such an idiot. 3 at once, bloody hell!!!!! Shock Xx

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