Aibu to not know what I'm doing!

[Heartofstrings]

I'm such an incompetent adult.

Two preschoolers. Work around 30h per week. I have the boys alone weekends as husband is at uni. Work into the evenings, finishing around 8pm.

Exercise is my issue. I've put on weight. I'm 172lbs. It's too heavy. I'm tired, stiff and feel old.

I want to feel lighter and for my body to struggled less.

My diet is disordered at best but I really want to try to incorporate some exercise into my routine. How the hell do I be strict? I like the idea of a gym but literally don't know where to start.

Gym program? When do I go? What to wear? How rubbish will I be at it? How do I stick to it?

I have no clue where to start

most gyms will have some kind of induction plan when you join and wll show you the different equipment and how to work it
some will even work a plan for you

I just feel they will think I'm so fat and gross

They say weight loss is made in the kitchen, and exercise is for toning up and mental health. You can't outrun a bad diet.

I would address your food first - you say your diet is "disordered", can you explain a bit more what you mean? What sorts of things do you make for your kids? Would you be willing to measure portion sizes and track using an app like MyFitnessPal just fo understand how much you're eating?

And don't worry about people judging you at the gym - no one thinks others are fat and gross, if they notice you at all (which they probably won't!) it will be to think "oh look, another person working out, just like me, good on her!"

@Heartofstrings

I just feel they will think I'm so fat and gross

Of course they won't! This is literally their job, helping people get fit/healthy/at their ideal weight. Take it one day at a time, don't think about the total weight that you need to loose. Best of luck, OP!

@Heartofstrings

I just feel they will think I'm so fat and gross

I promise that they won't. Gym staff love helping people get fit and healthy - that's why they work in gyms in the first place. The other members certainly won't give a stuff - they are all too busy with their own workouts to notice other people. Please don't allow these thoughts to take over and prevent you from doing yourself the best favour to yourself that you could.

Have a look at you tube "get fit with Rick".

They are walking exercise videos where you choose the number of steps to fit the time you have. They are easy to do once kids are in bed or whilst they are sat at table eating lunch etc.

Just starting to move more will help positivity and you can work on the rest from there.

The boys have a good diet. We ensure clean food and a balance of food groups. The eldest goes wild on sugar so very very low in refined sugar.

Me, on the other hand, I don't bother fixing anything for myself as I don't fancy their stuff. I just grab myself a pot noodle or something.

I tend to binge and then fast. I just can't get my head around three normal sized meals - let alone working out calorie cutting.

Its the toning up that I really want but I know I need to sort my eating first.

Husband is currently studying for exams and away a lot. I just can't seem to get it sorted

Stop even buying rubbish like pot noodles and start eating exactly what your DC eat, as it sounds like you’re providing them with a good diet. Eating with them, rather than separately, will also help as you’ll take longer over your food while you chat together etc.

Also, no gym staff will think you’re disgusting! They honestly see all sorts (DB is a PT and has seen it all!) Once you start exercising regularly, the endorphins will also help your confidence. Start slowly with little, realistic goals each week. Good luck!

So you make such an effort to ensure your kids eat well buy can't be arsed to do it for yourself? It's amazing how us mums fall in to this trap.

Make bigger portions of what your kids eat if cooking from scratch and add a large side salad and have that for dinner. Or try to get an hour in the kitchen to prep meals for the week, cook stuff to freeze down portioned out. I cooked 2 soups yesterday, 15 portions in the freezer. When you do cook things like chilli or bolognese, cook more and freeze it. Once you get in to this habit, it's such a relief to have healthy meals done because my god, healthy eating and calorie counting can be exhausting but its all in the prep.

Exercise is literally moving more, you don't need a gym right now, you need a good 10 minutes of dance your pant off music and move to it, it's stupid, fun and free.

Good luck x

Exercise is literally moving more, you don't need a gym right now, you need a good 10 minutes of dance your pant off music and move to it, it's stupid, fun and free.

This is what I do, a few boybands or some 80s cheese and I'm away. You could even get the kids involved, especially if you choose songs which have actions to go with them. (Agadoo, Baby Shark, Macarena, Cha Cha Slide.)

My eldest would not cope with excitable music sounds fun though.

I eat at weird times mostly because of work. But this is probably excuses. I just don't want to eat cucumber and egg and stuff. I know I need to.

This week will be a good week. It has to be

I don't fancy their stuff

I eat at weird times

I just don't want to eat cucumber and egg and stuff

Yes, I agree with you - these sound like excuses I think you need to get your head around eating healthier stuff and sitting down to eat with them, you need to model this kind of behaviour to your kids so they learn too but it sounds like you need to see them eating healthy whole foods and know that you could eat it too.

There's a hell of a lot more options healthier than a pot noodle that are not just cucumber and egg!! Why don't you tell us what you DO like, and we can suggest some ideas?