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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can a three year old sit through a panto?

141 replies

Liverbird77 · 08/05/2021 08:22

Aibu to ask if an about-to-turn-three year old would be able to sit and enjoy a two hour panto?

Me and my mum would love to take him, but we aren't sure if it is feasible.
There's no SEN or other special considerations to think about.

I am interested to hear from parents of older children. What age did you start to take them?

OP posts:
TheWatersofMarch · 08/05/2021 09:23

We took our son at 3. Enthralled by first half but 20'mins into second half was restless and fidgety so I had to take him into the foyer while DD watched it to the end with DP.

OutComeTheWolves · 08/05/2021 09:25

I thought no but when my oldest was 2 and a half we got a free ticket so I took him and he loved it. We've since took the younger ones and they seem to have either been really young and slept through it or older and enjoyed it.

Fizbosshoes · 08/05/2021 09:28

I think DS have and he is worse than DD for sitting still. I remember taking him to a panto when he was still in nappies so he must have been 3 or less.
However the theatre (and seats we normally choose) have space in front and at the end of the row where they could get up and wander for a few metres without obstructing others view. I think it depends on the panto too and how interactive it is. Like I say he was fine at a panto but couldnt sit still for the circus or a dance show.

Mellonsprite · 08/05/2021 09:30

Mine were probably aged 5 ish.
I think at 3 the novelty would wear off quickly and they would want to be up and down and wandering around etc.

ClarkeGriffin · 08/05/2021 09:32

Will he sit through a 2 hour movie? If so you'll probably be fine with a panto.

AbsolutelyPatsy · 08/05/2021 09:34

i think so, pantos are ideal for young children

DancesWithDaffodils · 08/05/2021 09:35

We had much more sucess with shorter productions aimed at a younger audience at that age.
Id say sone can, some cant, and it depends on the target audience of the panto. Unhelpful, I know!

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 08/05/2021 09:35

I took my daughter at 3.5. She has a long concentration span. She was terrified! The baddies were quite scary

lanadelgrey · 08/05/2021 09:43

Try a few shorter shows beforehand. Getting the hang of the whole theatre thing, will both help you work out whether they like it and also get them used to the whole experience - if you think about it from their pov crowding into a space through a noisy foyer and then the lights go down etc is unusual. We did the snowman at just under 3. We added a long lasting lollipop as well and then with DS 2 ended up going every year for about 8 years in a row.

CentrifugalBumblePuppy · 08/05/2021 09:45

It depends on the child! My son was brought up (and I mean from weeks old!) in a theatre environment as his dad & I swapped each other in & out of different productions. He was transfixed by this first panto at 18 month!

With panto, it’s controlled bonkers behaviour. There’s singing, audience participation, all the booing & hissing, there’s been wet seats from slightly older children when the baddie appears! People taking kids in & out of the performance is part of the deal.

If you take him, try to get seats as close to the aisle as possible, so you can take him out if it gets too much. Panto’s so bright & loud a lot of toddlers love it, some are terrified & it’s all too much!

Please support your local theatres this panto season. I have too many actor friends who have had no income during the pandemic, it’s been heartbreaking. Even their casual day jobs (a lot in catering, temping etc) are on zero hours contracts & have received sweet Fanny Adams as a result of lockdown. Likewise many of my tech friends.

Panto is wonderful.
Oh no it isn’t.
Oh yes, it is.

Definitelyrandom · 08/05/2021 09:47

I couldn’t stand pantos as a child so never took ours to any. Used to take them along to classical concerts with us from a very early age, with books to keep them occupied if they got restless. They were fine and didn’t disturb anyone.

MargaretThursday · 08/05/2021 09:51

Depends on the child.
Dd1 loved her first at just turned 2yo, but she would sit through anything from tiny.
Dd2 loved her first at 2 months. She was so excited and her little head was whipping round so fast to try and wat h the lights... However I wouldn't have taken her at 2yo. She sat through one at 3yo though.
Ds we were involved in an amateur one at that point, so he did see them, but until he was 3.5yo he didn't sit through a whole one, so we watched the first half one day and the second half another. I don't think he'd have even done that except because we were involved he knew lots of people so he was always wondering which friend would come on next.

Whoateallthechocolate · 08/05/2021 09:55

DS was a very wriggly child so I was a bit nervous when he went to his first one at 2.5. He sat on the edge on my knee, entranced for the entire first half, smeared chocolate ice cream over me and him in the interval (thanks, FIL!), resumed his position on the edge of my knee for most of the second half when, with about 5 mins to go, he keeled sideways having fallen asleep! He has behaved similarly (well, without the ice cream smearing & sleeping) at every performance he's been too since and he's now 8.
DD on the other hand was 4.5 at that first performance and, despite her usual calm demeanour, was more or less being physically restrained by DH and MIL towards the end as she was so bored and kept standing up. She hasn't been much better at subsequent shows. In the last panto she went to with Brownies aged 9 she fell asleep, something she repeated when they went to a big West End show matinee! I don't bother taking her to such things any more!

DarceyDashwood · 08/05/2021 10:01

I took my son to panto when he was two and he sat transfixed through (bar a little nap her had for about 20mins in Act 1). He’s 6 now and pre Covid we went to the theatre and cinema regularly. So depends on the child!

Agree with PP that there are lots of great kids theatre options that are shorter and less “full on” than panto - can recommend What The Ladybird Heard, Bear Hunt, In The Night Garden, Ben & Holly and Peppa Pig.

usernotfound0000 · 08/05/2021 10:03

DD1 managed at 3.5. We're hoping to go including DD2 this year and she will be just turned 3.

Looubylou · 08/05/2021 10:06

My son did and loved it. We usually sit front row upper circle as he is uncomfortable at the thought of being picked out or approached in the audience - he still felt safer up there 6 years later!!

littlepattilou · 08/05/2021 10:07

I'm going with no sorry @Liverbird77

I took my DD to the Cinderella panto at a theatre, when she was 3.5 years old, and although she loved Disney, it was SO LOUD. It was even a little too loud for me. The music blasting through the speakers, the audience cheering, laughing, roaring etc... Everything is mic'd up and amplified, and not suitable for a 3 year old.

Maybe take her to the cinema instead, to see a nice Christmas film? Smile

littlepattilou · 08/05/2021 10:09

Sorry posted too soon

@Liverbird77 25 minutes into the Cinderella panto I took my 3.5 DD too, we had to leave, because she couldn't stand the noise/loudness.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 08/05/2021 10:10

It totally depends on the child. Mine could and did at 2 - friends child at 6 couldn't.

NeverDropYourMoonCup · 08/05/2021 10:30

@RevolvingPivot

Depends. My now 9 year old couldn't sit through the cinema until she was 5.
I agree, it absolutely depends. My first trip to the cinema with my big brother was when I was 3 and he had agreed with our mother that he'd bring me home if I couldn't do it, but I apparently sat good as gold all the way through, whilst there are 10 year olds and fully grown adults who can't cope for three minutes without fidgeting, talking, using their sodding phones or getting up for a wee five times in the first half hour.

Panto tends to hold the attention more, as there are real people to watch, although I'd probably think a smaller scale play (things like summer shows in parks/large pub gardens) would be the easiest way to start if possible, as nobody expects little ones to be quiet as church mice for those.

Although I've never been to a panto where 'good theatre behaviour' was expected, anyhow. It's not what panto is for, is it?

In short, I'd take them.

katienana · 08/05/2021 10:39

I took my youngest at 2yrs 8 months and he sat through it but he was really frightened of the baddie. He was used to going to the cinema which probably helped

AnnaMagnani · 08/05/2021 10:49

Depends on the child.

This child loved theatre, hated panto.

Too loud, too shouty, too much audience participation, found baddies too scary, Dame intimidating, didn't like jokes that seemed to be at expense of other characters. Didn't think 'he's behind you' was funny.

However loved other kids shows. V happy memories of going to those which must have been just as loud but somehow much easier to cope with.

3scape · 08/05/2021 10:58

Two hours, probably not but our local panto does (did) a cut down version for matinee performances aimed at younger children.

Voomster953 · 08/05/2021 14:19

@emilyfrost

No, it’s not fair on everyone else there.
It’s panto, not Lear Hmm
KizzyMoo · 08/05/2021 14:26

No I wouldn't. And if they want to stand on the seat or be loud it just ruins it for other people.